I inherited mental illnesses from my mother. The first episode I remember occurred when I was around 10, but I didn’t know what it was. These continued, not knowing what they were, until I was diagnosed after a breakdown.
I have been somewhat of a binge eater since I was little girl. My mother always made it a point to make me aware of my weight and would put me on diets.
Beginning at around 4 or 5 my uncle began abusing me. I tried to tell my mother, but she always sent me to my room, telling me she was tired of hearing me cry.
Later in life it came to me that I was probably overeating to distract men.
About 20 years ago I began working out and lost a lot of weight, getting down to a size 4 and I felt great, but work began to take up more time and as months passed I started to decrease my workout days. Then stress took over and eating started again. Now I am about 100# overweight.
I was finally diagnosed with my MH illnesses in my early 30s and realized that my binge eating was related to both the abuse and MH issues.
I don’t eat breakfast or lunch because I’m not hungry. I do eat a well balanced dinner, but later the cravings start. I know I should be eating better, that I shouldn’t even buy junk food and exercise more.
I did start exercising last week and I thought once I started my bingeing would stop,. As I placed my grocery order I found myself ordering junk food. It seems easy to say “just don’t buy it”, but I couldn’t stop myself.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I have my doctor’s appt in a few weeks and I’m pretty sure I’m heavier than last year.
PLEASE HELP!!!!