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Xerox
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Member Since: Jun 2020
Location: Chicago
Posts: 32
3 yr Member
Default Jun 25, 2020 at 05:03 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeezyks View Post
Hello Xerox: Thank you for sharing this experience. I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.

I'm sorry I don't think there are any insights I can offer into what you experienced with this man. I think you mentioned that, perhaps, he's just really lonely. Or, as you also mentioned, he could be a predator of some sort. The bottom line is there's really no way to know. However the speed with which he seemed to want to push your relationship would raise a red flag for me. I think, since it sounds as though you're really not interested in continuing to see him on a long-term basis anyway, the best option here may be to simply chalk this up to experience, go no-contact, and move on. At least those are my thoughts on the subject.

At the end of your post you wrote you have more to say. So perhaps you'll write more about that in subsequent posts? I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

Thank you for your response.

I suspect this man has some mental health issues.


I have more than my share of my own, so I'm not prejudiced against him if he has any. I didn't think it was a good idea for two people with their own unresolved issues to be in a relationship, though. I think we would have only made each other even more unhappy.


I find myself missing him. At the same time, I'm not sure if he had the best intentions.

Some mornings, I wake up cursing myself for letting myself be taken in by this guy in any way when I felt something wasn't right about him. By night, I'm feeling sorry for him.


I didn't get to know him well enough, so I can never be sure what to make of him.


I blocked his phone number and deleted the e-mail address I wrote to him from after I spoke to my therapist, two days after I last saw him.


As I wrote, he didn't write or call me again after I left him that night. Maybe it was because he finally realized I wasn't going to do everything he wanted me to do just because he asked me. Maybe he really was seeking a relationship, and thought I had rejected him. I will never know.


My initial response was fear. I was completely paranoid for two days. I thought this guy was planning something. I thought maybe I had passed along an STI to him. I thought he was going to be out for revenge. I thought I'd have to disguise myself, or go into hiding. I realize now this was silly. I doubt I will ever hear from him again.


As far as inviting me to live with him, offering to take me to Alaska, and alluding to the fact that he has lots and lots of money to throw around (I jokingly told him that as a 'Taurus', I like material objects), he might have been trying to 'groom' me. All it did was arouse my suspicion and completely baffle me at the same time.
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Thanks for this!
Skeezyks