I am so sorry for your pain, neo. Do you have to live in the greater Toky metro area? I useed to work in Shnjuku ane Shibuya. It is very, very stressful living there, as you know. Someplace like Kyoto or even Yokohama would be far more relaxing. Just a thought.

I hve dealt with severe depression for most of my life. I know what it is like. What are your current meds? DO you trust your psychiatrist? Is ketamine available in Tokyo, by chance? It can work when nothing else does. That was the case for me.

Sending you strength and support and love. You are not alone. Spend some time here, post some feelings and share. You will find a lot of support here.

Love and hugs!!!!!!!!!