Hi Kriss, it's good that you are reaching out and asking for help, even though that is a really scary thing to do. That's what is going to get you through this. I've seen your post about your brother, and I don't know what else is happening in your life, and in your mind and your body to make you feel the way you are feeling, but I promise you (I have experience of this) it can get better, and as long as you keep on reaching out, it will get better.
It's good that you have role models like Keanu!