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blacksheep XX
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Member Since Apr 2009
Posts: 2
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Default Apr 09, 2009 at 05:14 PM
 
Well, I couldn't figure out how to start a new thread, so I'll reply to your Welcome Message by saying thanks, Doc!

I'm pretty certain I have a APD issue. I also have a bad case of treatment resistant depression from which I've suffered for 25 years. I've had unsuccessful ECT treatments and many drug trials. I have an unresolved sleep disorder as well. However; I write to you, here today about my problem with shoplifting. It's been going on for about a year and half and progressing. It's become a hobby. I'm a female, 44 yrs. old and every time I go into a store, I want to "get away with some thing." I feel childish and know I should be ashamed, but I love getting away with something for nothing, and with the economy so poor and us cutting back on our budget so severely, I always rationalize "buy one- take one."

I have a great therapist, but I don't want to share this with her. We have enough stuff that we are working on currently (unresolved family issues, cognitive & dialectical behavioral therapy, etc.) I fear that she will think less of me, too. It's such a stupid problem-- I can't believe that I can't figure out why I'm doing it, myself and why I can't just stop. I certainly know the unhappy end to this is getting caught, humiliated, and possibly sanctioned. It happened to me when I was in my early twenties and I had quit. Why can't I keep that in my head now and stop again? More importantly, why do I lack normal moral integrity?
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