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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
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#1
I only feel normal and relaxed, friendly, when I have the chemical of alcohol in my system. Other than that I'm totally socially awkward and actually hate being around people. Do not like strangers. Look upon them with distaste and, yes, hate. Why?
Internets fine because we're not actually in each others presence. But that's not right. Last edited by mote.of.soul; Dec 04, 2019 at 02:35 PM.. |
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bizi, Fuzzybear
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simplex, WastingAsparagus
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,126
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#2
Maybe I'm just too sensitive. It's a curse.
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bizi, Fuzzybear
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WastingAsparagus
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Student of Life
Member Since Mar 2014
Location: South America
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#3
I feel the same way usually at least with regard to socializing. For me, I had to get put on an anti-anxiety medication for it. Now I don't have as many cravings for alcohol. I don't know if that might help you, but now I feel more relaxed around people.
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bizi
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mote.of.soul
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,126
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#4
No, it's good insight thanks. But I've been on ant anxiety meds too which do help me to an extent but still. Hey I'm glad I'm not alone.
But just now I was talking to an interesting lady, because I've had a few drinks, but all I wanted to say to her in the end was you smell like sausages, go away. So...yeah. |
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bizi
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Student of Life
Member Since Mar 2014
Location: South America
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#5
Quote:
I actually don't recommend the anti-anxiety meds anymore. They are literally ruining my life--especially benzos. --So anyway. I definitely can't socialize at all without alcohol involved. It sucks. |
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bizi, mote.of.soul
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
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#6
Quote:
Why can't any motherf....rs help us? I'm 50! |
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WastingAsparagus
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Legendary
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#7
Well, at the end of the day it's obviously a case of just keep going forward and keep the hope alive, keep trying. At least the birds and the night sky give me good feelings.
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bizi
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bizi, WastingAsparagus
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Legendary
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#8
If you go to any AA or NA meeting pretty much from Rio to Akron, you will find someone or, more likely, several someones, who share this phenomenon you describe with you. Not saying you're an alcoholic, just saying that a very large number of alcoholics will say they only felt normal when they drank (until, of course, it got out of control).
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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bizi
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bizi
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#9
A big part of this is biochemical. If you're brain is used to having alcohol, then that is its "normal" it needs the alcohol to function. When you remove the alcohol, your brain misses it, and doesn't quite know how to operate.
I had the same problem with learning to socialize sober when I quit drinking. Going to AA helped because it helped me realize I wasn't alone, but for a couple of years, I just stayed close to a few of my IRL friends and mainly socialized with them, and gradually added larger gatherings. But even now, I don't feel comfortable going to large parties where I don't know a lot of people. splitimage |
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bizi, bpcyclist
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WastingAsparagus
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Student of Life
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#10
Quote:
I kind of realized this too... I actually hate going to bars sober. I mean, it kind of makes sense. They're loud, etc. I don't know... I don't have to love going to bars. So I came to a similar realization. I am actually trying to make cafés my main hangout spots. As in, when I invite friends to do something, I'll invite them for a coffee instead of for a drink at a bar. I'll see how this goes. |
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bizi
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bizi, splitimage
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#11
Hey @mote.of.soul
Do you think you are an alcoholic? Are you a weekend warrior or binge drinker? Do you drink everyday? __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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bizi
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mote.of.soul
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Legendary
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#12
Hi. I'm a little bit more sober since I posted this thread but...
Yes, I do think I'm an alcoholic @sarahsweets, thanks. Actually, I know I'm an alcoholic. An alcoholic in the sense that, once I put a drink into my system, away I go on a binge, quite knowingly. I've known since a teen that that's the way I drink. I don't try to have one or two drinks - that's for normal drinkers. But I'm usually abstinent then I binge after a few weeks or months. Ever since a youth, I've struggled also with anxiety, you see. The medical system hasn't been able to help me much over the years with that, but I know it's the underlying reason for the drinking. Alcohol, my friend, gives me a relief - and then a terrible depressive hangover. It's a catch 22. What do you do to stay sober, sarahsweets? Do you have a daily program of some sort? And also do you suffer from anxiety? |
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bizi, bpcyclist, Fuzzybear
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Wisest Elder Ever
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#13
__________________ |
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bizi, bpcyclist, mote.of.soul
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,126
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#14
Thank you @Fuzzybear, I needed to hear that. Been struggling a bit recently but it'll be okay. New year, new beginnings.
I hope you're going okay, as well. |
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bizi, Fuzzybear
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Wisest Elder Ever
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#15
I think you're great just as you are. I do understand about alcohol making bears feel more relaxed. I don't (usually) ''over indulge'' in alcohol but I do like some with my salmon.
Hugs and respect @mote.of.soul (eta) I just noticed I had already replied to this. Just want you to know you're being thought of with kindness and respect if you're reading this out there. __________________ |
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