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Default Dec 21, 2018 at 03:15 PM
  #1
Both my parents were alcoholics. My father was high functioning and my mother was low functioning. She drank herself to death by the time I was 13. My sister took up drinking for some reason. I never did. I wonder why someone would since alcoholism runs in families. Why not avoid the possibility of becoming an alcoholic by never drinking?

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Default Dec 22, 2018 at 07:05 AM
  #2
I don't think this is something we can fully control, AceRimmer... some people just pick up the habits and that's the way it goes. I don't think it's their fault. Others are able to avoid it. You never know what can happen in life. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Dec 22, 2018 at 12:15 PM
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Not being facetious here Ace, but I can tell you that personally I developed a taste for it early on, at my father’s knee as it were, before I had ever heard of such a thing as “alcoholism”. And once you do develop a taste for it, it can tend to sink its claws in pretty deep.
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Heart Dec 22, 2018 at 12:18 PM
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Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky View Post
I don't think this is something we can fully control, AceRimmer... some people just pick up the habits and that's the way it goes. I don't think it's their fault. Others are able to avoid it. You never know what can happen in life. Sending many hugs to you
Mickey you are such an angel. I wish you the brightest of Holidays.
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Default Dec 23, 2018 at 10:30 AM
  #5
Something I've wondered about some too. I come from a pretty long line of alcoholics. Mopey mentions acquiring a taste for it I guess one way I'm lucky is that I've yet to find hardly any alcohol I care for the taste of (save for flavored drinks that mask the taste).

I do know that coming from a childhood with an alcoholic parent or parents, a lot of us bring a lot of emotional baggage and pain. And life isn't guaranteed to get any easier in adulthood. Maybe for whatever reason that's what they choose to numb their pain.
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Default Dec 23, 2018 at 11:27 AM
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Something I've wondered about some too. I come from a pretty long line of alcoholics. Mopey mentions acquiring a taste for it I guess one way I'm lucky is that I've yet to find hardly any alcohol I care for the taste of (save for flavored drinks that mask the taste).

I do know that coming from a childhood with an alcoholic parent or parents, a lot of us bring a lot of emotional baggage and pain. And life isn't guaranteed to get any easier in adulthood. Maybe for whatever reason that's what they choose to numb their pain.
I think you have a very good point there, Mr. Walker. And by all means continue to avoid the stuff.
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Default Dec 24, 2018 at 03:50 AM
  #7
I don't drink 'hardly at all' for that very reason.

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Default Dec 24, 2018 at 02:50 PM
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Not being facetious here Ace, but I can tell you that personally I developed a taste for it early on, at my father’s knee as it were, before I had ever heard of such a thing as “alcoholism”. And once you do develop a taste for it, it can tend to sink its claws in pretty deep.
How old were you when you developed a taste for it? I had access to it when I was as young as 10. It was never locked up. I didn't know what alcoholism was but I knew it messed people up by seeing what it did to my mother. I wasn't going to end up like that.

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Default Dec 24, 2018 at 04:16 PM
  #9
Good for you Ace. More power to you. I would say that by the time I was in my mid teens I was drinking wine with dinner and the occasional hot buttered rum. Come to think of it, that souns pretty good as I sit here waiting at the laundromat with rain running down my windshield...
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Default Dec 25, 2018 at 09:38 AM
  #10
It can be difficult to resist the example set by parents. One grows up with that example, one sees it every day. That example can seem as natural and irresistible as the air one breathes.
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Unhappy Dec 25, 2018 at 10:11 AM
  #11
There are many reasons why children of alcoholics and drug addicts also end up abusing alcohol and drugs as well.

Mother's that abuse alcohol and/or drugs while pregnant will most likely have babies that are born already addicted to the substances they (the mother) are abusing ... These babies have to go through detox as soon as they are born.

Some kids are able to overcome it, but most are not as the monkey has already been put on their back long before they had the choice to choose to "Just Say No" to alcohol and drugs.

Also, some parents think it's funny to let their toddlers and children ingest alcohol and drugs and laugh at the kids when they get tipsy, drunk or stoned on the substances they (the parents) are abusing.

That to me is a very sick and evil thing to do to a child.

Oh!, and there are also parents that use their children as mules, dealers and runners when the parents manufacture, sale and distribute such substances illegally, and most often these children grow up to continue doing what it is they've been taught to do.

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Default Dec 25, 2018 at 10:22 AM
  #12
Well, here was my reasoning.

I had my first taste of alcohol somewhere around 8 years old. I was feeling a little sick to my stomach, and my step-father (an alcoholic himself, and the first of a string of several alcoholic/addict step-fathers) told me a can of beer would help. Gave me one, and said I should drink all of it. I hated it. And it didn't especially settle my stomach, either.

But I felt *so* grown up, sitting there drinking a beer with my step-father.

In our family, children had basically no value. Adults were the only ones who mattered. Life centered around what pleased them, while kids existed to basically sit there and shut up, do as they were told, and speak only when they were spoken to.

I didn't like being a non-person. I wanted to be an adult. And as far as I could tell, drinking, smoking, and cussing were what adults did. If you didn't do those things, then you were still a little kid. And who wanted to be one of those, if it meant you didn't matter?
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Default Dec 26, 2018 at 02:37 PM
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It can be difficult to resist the example set by parents. One grows up with that example, one sees it every day. That example can seem as natural and irresistible as the air one breathes.
My mother set herself on fire twice. She almost drowned in the bathtub once. She killed my dog. Dad lost his driver's license for a year once.

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Default Dec 26, 2018 at 04:24 PM
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My mother set herself on fire twice. She almost drowned in the bathtub once. She killed my dog. Dad lost his driver's license for a year once.
Oh, Ace, that is beyond 20,000 times HORRIBLE!!!
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Default Dec 27, 2018 at 04:53 PM
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Well, here was my reasoning.

I had my first taste of alcohol somewhere around 8 years old. I was feeling a little sick to my stomach, and my step-father (an alcoholic himself, and the first of a string of several alcoholic/addict step-fathers) told me a can of beer would help. Gave me one, and said I should drink all of it. I hated it. And it didn't especially settle my stomach, either.

But I felt *so* grown up, sitting there drinking a beer with my step-father.

In our family, children had basically no value. Adults were the only ones who mattered. Life centered around what pleased them, while kids existed to basically sit there and shut up, do as they were told, and speak only when they were spoken to.

I didn't like being a non-person. I wanted to be an adult. And as far as I could tell, drinking, smoking, and cussing were what adults did. If you didn't do those things, then you were still a little kid. And who wanted to be one of those, if it meant you didn't matter?
Highly irresponsible of you step-father. I see where you are coming from though. Being adult is what made lots of kids smoke and drink. But I thought adults were all morons. Not just my parents either. My teachers were idiots too. Like the time I got in trouble for going on the jungle gym in the playground. They told us not to play chicken on the jungle gym, so when I got on and a freak named Wendel got on I told him to get off because I was on first. He wouldn't get off after I told him 3 times. So before he got anywhere near me I jumped off. But the dumb teach still chewed me out for playing chicken.

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Default Dec 29, 2018 at 06:53 AM
  #16
I am 43 so growing up with an undiagnosed mentally ill, addict father, yet sober mother I had a 50/50 shot. I had never heard the word alcoholism until I was an adult. My parents were hippies that eloped in California and had me when they were 21. My mom has always been great and parenting made her an adult immediately. My dad, he wasnt ready. Easy accepted access to mind altering drugs from the 70's and lack of knowledge about addicts made it hard for my mother to accept things about her husband. Everyone that was a hippie mostly grew up and entered the 80's having given up party drugs, coke and stuff. People were fine with the town drunk but intolerant with the town crackhead and the war on drugs..anyway I am being long winded. My mom didnt realize until much later what an addict is, how good at being manipulative they are, plus she was emotionally abused by my dad. Unfortunately for me, I inherited the (old school label was massive depressive) bipolar II and addict genes and combine that with my personality and it was only a matter of time.
I am so fortunate I didnt get into hard drugs- I say that tongue and cheek though because stopping drinking was the most brutal thing I have ever done and I did it like an idiot on my own. I am so fortunate I didnt die trying. So... I basically was modeled coping mechanisms that were not viable or healthy even though I had a great mom, and had an abusive relationship with my dad even past their divorce. And I spent my entire 20's and early 30's learning how to grow up and be a healthy adult. BTW my dad never stopped drinking and recreationally using drugs and dropped dead of a heart attack at age 47 in his driveway so I am glad I stopped.

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