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Default Jan 06, 2019 at 08:28 AM
  #1
I have searched for a thread on this but no luck.

How is work going along? Is it affecting your mental health? Are you able to achieve a work/life balance? Have you advised your employer of your health? Have they been supportive or accommodating of your needs?

I returned to work four months ago and it is not going well. My anxiety is sky high and I often panic. I hate the job, I am scared of the job, but I have no choice. I have been looking for other employment to no avail. I am lucky then to have this one.

The problem is there is a huge lack of training and support. I keep having new duties slapped upon me without the preparation to teach and assist me. I keep getting thrown to the wolves and it feels as though they are throwing me under the bus instead of setting me up for success. I have a great deal of leadership and management experience so I know this is wrong and I know how it ought to be. So add in the infuriation into the mix.

I ask for assistance and all I get is a verbal list of things I should do. Messages are mixed and no answer is concrete - things like take the form and complete it without instructions as to how or even where to obtain it. There is no effort made to make sure I understand what is required and how to do it either. Verbally, and curtly, listing off the duties is not training me. They should be written down. I should have an opportunity to learn them first (job shadowing would be a good idea). Showing me and demonstrating the way to perform the duties should be occuring. This is all so wrong. Do they want me to fail because it sure feels like they don't want me to succeed.

I also informed my employer I have PTSD related to being assaulted on the sales floor by a customer in a previous work place. I explained too that there had at the time been a very real concern of stalking. That workplace supplied a security person to walk me to and from my vehicle. I parked at the door. At my present workplace we are not allowed to park in the store parking lot. The store is newly built and is on the edge of the city in an empty field all around. Getting to my car involves a long walk in the dark far out of sight of the exit door. I asked if I could be permitted to park in the lot near the door. Nope. Their response to 'accommodate' me was to tell me to wear a safety vest. This is the sort of leadership I deal with.
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Default Jan 06, 2019 at 08:44 AM
  #2
Sorry that you are having a difficult time at work. Adjusting to a new environment can be difficult. No matter what kind of experience or expertise you may have, most companies are looking for employees who are willing to adjust to the needs and the demands of the customers and employees they serve. Things just don't seem to be going your way on this one, and that is okay.

Chances are others at your workplace have struggled with the same issues. It is possible to seek out a co-worker or supervisor who may be understanding of your needs and may be able to suggest an effective way to speak to management. Are their other personal problems in your life that you have not had the resources to resolve and are using work as a way to run away from those problems? Is there a safe place to turn?

I commend you for getting assistance with your safety concerns and am happy your pervious workplace took you seriously. When a problem such as stalking, bullying or harassment is not handled quickly and effectively, there is a likely chance that the problem escalates and someone gets hurt (emotionally or physically), and often how that person is able to heal themselves is not in the authority or power of a large corporation. If a safety vest doesn't work(or is not an option), ask them to recommend something else and explain why. I suggest finding a co-worker or supervisor to check in with.
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Default Jan 06, 2019 at 10:08 AM
  #3
My job is going ok. I have a long shift on Monday which I’m nervous about. Work doesn’t know about my disability. Although if anyone there is familiar with autism I’m sure they have figured me out. My managers are nice. My coworkers are nice. There’s this one weird coworker who likes fool around with me. I think she has a crush on me. Based on her behavior towards management the last time I saw her I think she has mental health issues of her own

I avoid the customers. I have had very rude customers. I just don’t wear my name badge. No one at work has said anything. Customers don’t know I work there. I just avoid the situation altogether. Out of 3 of the jobs I’ve had, this is the best according to how I’m treated, pay, and hours. It still does really take a toll on my mental health though and I am unable to work full time or get a second job.

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Default Jan 06, 2019 at 11:01 AM
  #4
If you are in the U.S., and you ask for accommodation due to a mental health disability, your employer is obligated by law to work with you. You do need to submit medical note from your Dr or T if requested by the employer, but it can be as simple as just asking with the right wording if you haven't already done so. Sounds like a parking situation is an easy accommodation. If they won't do it under the disability category, then call an attorney because they're breaking federal employment law.

My work is a major source of triggering for my panic. Most days, I feel like I'm in a constant low-grade attack for the entire day. They happen so often that I can't tell where one ends and another begins. Unfortunately in my case, there are no accommodations that will enable me to keep doing it. I'm hoping to be out of this job very soon.

I hope things get better for you.
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Default Jan 06, 2019 at 07:54 PM
  #5
My local sports team just lost. I’m worried people are going to be upset/ angry at work tommorow and it will affect our performance and cause management to get angry and be in a bad mood. I know when Trump won a cashier was super nasty to my mom, and my mom wasn’t even doing anything. This is a legit concern of mine and I’m freaking the **** out right now.

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Default Jan 07, 2019 at 06:31 AM
  #6
Thx friends, I appreciate the kind words of support and the offering of your own examples. It suggests I am not alone.

In reply to AB2371 (I found your post very articulate), my life outside of work is actually pretty good. If there does exist an issue it is that the anxiety has robbed me of enjoying my life beyond the workplace. It is a struggle for my common law husband. He is doing his best to be supportive. WHile he may not understand the fear he sees me going through he does understand that anxiety will permeate everything else. You also asked if there is anyone I can approach - coworker or leadership. I have already tried this. A big source of the problem is that leadership of my small department doesn't get involved much; we are on our own fending for ourselves. The other issue is that the other staff in this department have been a group for years and years. Consequently they are very cliquey and I am doing my darnedest to break into the fold. They are intimidating and completely unsupportive; hence their snippy and terse replies when I ask for help or question something. As for leadership I once did approach them about this problem of feeling an outsider and feeling intimidated by several in particular. What did that person do? They told one of these people who responded by giving me royal crap for ratting on them - in front of customers no less. When I again approached the supervisor she laughed about it all and admitted telling the coworker about it.

As for the comment that I try to avoid customers I cannot do so. It is my very main duty of employment to engage them all.
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Default Jan 07, 2019 at 08:50 AM
  #7
Work in general creates anxiety for me. My personal theory is that the workloads people are required to carry these days is much bigger than 10 or 20 years ago - for various reasons - bottom line is we are all trying to do more with less. I notice in my own workplace... some people become very anxious by it... I am one of those... and many people just don’t care and don’t get their work done which leads to more work on the others. Customers are demanding and unkind but profit is the goal so we put up with a lot of bad behavior... I want to learn how to not care so much so I don’t get so anxious. I think it’s a mess. There was a time I enjoyed my work and I enjoyed friendships with coworkers... it’s not that way anymore... It’s changed.
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Default Jan 10, 2019 at 09:24 AM
  #8
So I had a melt down at work yesterday and I am really embarrassed. But it did generate some results. During this freak-out I pointed out that instead of being set up for success that I was being thrown under the bus. I accused leadership of failing in their responsibilities. Humiliating the way this was all brought about but there was some action that followed. I have been panicking for weeks about today's shift and the new duties and responsibilities that come with it. I've been asking for help and support all along. Well, I finally got some coaching last night on account of my little scene making going into work today a little easier. I am very embarrassed but I finally got some real leadership for a change.
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Default Jan 10, 2019 at 10:11 AM
  #9
I'm really happy to hear that, WishfulThinker66! I'm so sorry work is being so hard for you but I'm glad you were able to speak up a bit at least. Please don't give up. Work can be really tough, but I hope things will improve for you soon. I'd suggest to not give up your search for a new job. You may be able to find one that suits you better than the current one. Keep looking if you can. Try to hang on, and please don't feel embarassed. It wasn't your fault and it's clear that you're trying your best. You can do this! Feel free to PM me anytime. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Jan 10, 2019 at 10:51 AM
  #10
My job is currently responsible for the vast majority of my anxiety IMO.
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Default Jan 11, 2019 at 02:24 PM
  #11
Well I managed to get through the shift of new duties and responsibilities. It was eventful however with a lot that was out of my control going wrong. I did it but it sure wasn't pleasant.
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Default Jan 13, 2019 at 03:04 PM
  #12
At work today we had to move 5 foot tall-10 foot long shelves of merchandise. We had to make sure the racks didn’t separate so the merchandise wouldn’t fall through and break. This was before the store opened. Everyone who was there just chose a side to get on, and pushed while someone yelled at directions on which way to move them. It was so, so anxiety provoking. I suck at following these sorts of directions. I get so confused. Luckily I was doing ok. Stuff was breaking, but it wasn’t my fault. No one got yelled at. The whole day was just stressful and anxiety provoking. But nothing bad actually happened. It was just how I was feeling.

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Default Jan 19, 2019 at 09:41 AM
  #13
I quit the job on Wednesday. After having two public panic attacks during the previous week and a meltdown Wednesday night on the job, I found myself giving notice and signing all the paperwork. Maybe I was wrong. I could have asked to be switched to a department or some other accomodation of my anxiety. I doubt it would have helped however. It certainly wouldn't have solved the infuriating problem of lack of leadership.

I can tell you, I have lived stress free these last few days and it has been fabulous. I never realised just how sick work had made me.
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