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Old 02-28-2019, 11:42 PM #1
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Default Self-identity issues

I have a difficult time reflecting myself as to who I am actually is. Even coming up with a decent nickname for myself is hard. My nickname may sound like I'm doing well but I'm struggling to an extent. I also don't understand my real personality, and how to portray myself properly in front of others without feeling anxious. It all seem like anxiety is my only personality and identity. Can anyone else relate to this and how do you cope with it?
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Old 03-01-2019, 03:10 AM #2
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

I'm so sorry, stayingalfoat I'm sure many other people here on PC can relate to what you've just wrote. Unfortunately we're so busy trying our best to survive that we can forget who we truly are. Just remember that you're NOt defined by your label or MI. Finding ourselves is certainly not an easy task. Many people are struggling with it. Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. You could learn new ways to cope with your feeling. I feel like it may be really helpful to you if you don't have it already of course. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. Please don't give up. Stay strong, stayingafloat. Stay safe and take care of yourself. You're a wonderful person. You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this
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Old 03-01-2019, 06:59 AM #3
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

To "know thyself" has been the goal of philosophies and religions from the beginning of written history. Many see this as a valid quest and many of the religions believe that if a person truly knows oneself, only then will that person know God.
I have been having many of the issues you speak of unfortunately it is not so easy to know oneself. Who is the captain of the ship? Can the "I" really know itself? The "I" or the "I am" is the experiencer or the witness, but it really is not the one always in control although it could be. We are not our minds or what minds feel or think, we are not the thoughts. The mind is a tool, like our lungs we have the ability to voluntarily use our minds, but our minds also work without our volition, our minds change, we do not. I have an anxious response in many situations, but really I do not, my body does, I am not anxious, but whispering to my body to calm down, if I were the body I would be able to control this without so much work. When we truly know ourselves we are the same person no matter who we are with and that is important because much anxiety comes from our questioning of why we acted the way we did. Do not worry yourself over it, when you ready you will learn it. Once you know yourself truly, you are free. Self inquiry and meditation are good tools to start.
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Old 03-02-2019, 08:11 PM #4
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

Great question StayingAFloat. I think a lot of people struggle with knowing and understanding themselves. Would you be open to discussing with a therapist? Or trying meditation? I wish you peace.
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Old 03-02-2019, 08:44 PM #5
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverTrees View Post
Great question StayingAFloat. I think a lot of people struggle with knowing and understanding themselves. Would you be open to discussing with a therapist? Or trying meditation? I wish you peace.
Yes we are working on this as part of therapy. Its just that I have great difficulty searching my real self and what are the personal values i stand for.
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Old 03-02-2019, 08:58 PM #6
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

Quote:
Originally Posted by stayingafloat View Post
Yes we are working on this as part of therapy. Its just that I have great difficulty searching my real self and what are the personal values i stand for.
I understand. That's a great goal. Perhaps you could try a stream of consciousness exercise. Write your name in the middle of a piece of paper and write down everything that pops into your head associated with yourself. See what presents.

Something I read suggested thinking about what causes you most hurt or pain in life...if you reverse that you can start to identify your values. For example, someone who feels deeply hurt by feeling disconnected would have a strong personal value of connecting with others. Just an idea for you.
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Old 03-05-2019, 03:28 AM #7
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

The opposite is true: the anxiety comes about because you can't show your real personality.
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Old 03-06-2019, 06:55 PM #8
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

Yeah I can relate feel the real me died along time ago. No idea now. Just felt nothiness just existing waiting to die really
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Old 03-09-2019, 12:56 PM #9
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

Here's what I think. In each one of the personality disorders you will find a list of symptoms. In each list, one of the symptoms is a consequence of living in America. If you have feelings like you don't know who you are, my guess is because you don't have the identity of a career. We forget all the time that the DSM is a political document and that diagnoses are but one metric the government uses to organize the populace into groups it can exploit. These metrics can also be used to gauge how will policies are working or not. Your diagnosis goes straight into the computer system and straight to the CIA, or whatever department is responsible for keeping track of the metrics this week. Could be a university somewhere.
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Old 03-09-2019, 06:05 PM #10
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Default Re: Self-identity issues

I have these thoughts too. ive heard of others dealing with identity issues too. I have no answer as I am in the same boat with you right now, especially recently. my son is too.
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