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Anonymous44539
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Trig May 27, 2019 at 03:23 AM
  #1
Please forgive me here if this is a long read, or if I seem a little out of sorts (not that anyone really knows me on this site, but still) here.

I'm writing this in an almost desperate act/ attempt at finding anyone out there who can relate, or knows how to interact/ talk with someone with issues/ conditions such as (listed below).

Along with dealing with things like working a full time job, trying to have a relationship (unsuccessfully), even dealing with something as simple as going to the store for food and supplies. All while continuing to struggle through one day to the next, feeling like you don't belong, you don't matter, that or no one wants you around. Feeling as if you're nothing but a burden on those around you/ in your life, that or nothing but a nuisance

  • Borderline personality disorder
  • Bipolar 1 (w/ Rapid/ or Ultradian cycling, along with psychotic tendencies)
  • Complex-PSTD (never served, or seen hand-to-hand combat, yet you'd have to hear my story to understand why I was dx'd with this, if interested in knowing)
  • Dissociate Disorder
  • Chronic Depression
  • Agoraphobia
  • Social Anxiety
  • Chronic Insomnia


Not to bore anyone with too much tmi here, yet I've never found anyone who can really relate, or for that matter knows how to interact/ talk with someone with such issues as mine.

We all have our own story's to tell, this is true, yet I spend a great deal of time isolated and alone (given how my issues effect my life on any given day), yet I've found it extremely difficult to open up to those who don't understand these conditions.

I spend far more time with no one to talk/ turn to, where the deafening silence of these four walls becomes too much to deal with, along with racing thoughts/ scenario's which continually play out in my head once something effects me when it comes to my conditions.

Its more like, once triggered, the anger slowly morphs into sadness and despair, the despair later turns into deep depression and self loathing, and before too long, I'm altogether wishing bad things and can't find any comfort from anyone, only able to find solace in sleep. In the hopes tomorrow will be a new day, and with that, new possibilities other then what's already been on my plate, if any of that makes any sense?
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Anonymous32451
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Default May 27, 2019 at 07:28 AM
  #2
I have experience with most (if not all) of these

my best friend was borderline (RIP), and I'd help her on a daily bases cope with her emotions

I'm diagnosed bipolar and DID, extremely light sleeper, and my level of social interaction is limited to say 1 person at a time (and only then when I really get to know them), I also have issues with trust- severe issues with trust
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nels13245
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Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: australia
Posts: 46
5 yr Member
Default May 27, 2019 at 07:38 AM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by KasperBlue View Post
Please forgive me here if this is a long read, or if I seem a little out of sorts (not that anyone really knows me on this site, but still) here.

I'm writing this in an almost desperate act/ attempt at finding anyone out there who can relate, or knows how to interact/ talk with someone with issues/ conditions such as (listed below).

Along with dealing with things like working a full time job, trying to have a relationship (unsuccessfully), even dealing with something as simple as going to the store for food and supplies. All while continuing to struggle through one day to the next, feeling like you don't belong, you don't matter, that or no one wants you around. Feeling as if you're nothing but a burden on those around you/ in your life, that or nothing but a nuisance

  • Borderline personality disorder
  • Bipolar 1 (w/ Rapid/ or Ultradian cycling, along with psychotic tendencies)
  • Complex-PSTD (never served, or seen hand-to-hand combat, yet you'd have to hear my story to understand why I was dx'd with this, if interested in knowing)
  • Dissociate Disorder
  • Chronic Depression
  • Agoraphobia
  • Social Anxiety
  • Chronic Insomnia


Not to bore anyone with too much tmi here, yet I've never found anyone who can really relate, or for that matter knows how to interact/ talk with someone with such issues as mine.

We all have our own story's to tell, this is true, yet I spend a great deal of time isolated and alone (given how my issues effect my life on any given day), yet I've found it extremely difficult to open up to those who don't understand these conditions.

I spend far more time with no one to talk/ turn to, where the deafening silence of these four walls becomes too much to deal with, along with racing thoughts/ scenario's which continually play out in my head once something effects me when it comes to my conditions.

Its more like, once triggered, the anger slowly morphs into sadness and despair, the despair later turns into deep depression and self loathing, and before too long, I'm altogether wishing bad things and can't find any comfort from anyone, only able to find solace in sleep. In the hopes tomorrow will be a new day, and with that, new possibilities other then what's already been on my plate, if any of that makes any sense?
I fully understand what it's like to have some of these conditions. Definitely am one of the most understanding persons I know of, I never look down on people no matter how different they are, as long as they are respectful and kind to other people than I'm there for them.

I have had really tough battles myself and still do. I might not have all the things you have listed but

But I'm the type of person to fully accept a person regardless or what they have experienced and despite what mental illness they battle with, AS LONG AS there intentions are good and they respect others, that's all that matters.

I can be there as a mate. We can link up through some social media? I play a lot of online games? I'dk upto you!
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Anonymous44539
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Default Jun 14, 2019 at 12:10 AM
  #4
Apologies for taking awhile to get back to this post. Kind of forgot about it. Thx for the huggs Turnout, and comment Raging and Nels..... What kind of online games do you play Nels?
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xmascarol
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Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: United States
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Default Jun 14, 2019 at 05:06 PM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by KasperBlue View Post
Please forgive me here if this is a long read, or if I seem a little out of sorts (not that anyone really knows me on this site, but still) here.

I'm writing this in an almost desperate act/ attempt at finding anyone out there who can relate, or knows how to interact/ talk with someone with issues/ conditions such as (listed below).

Along with dealing with things like working a full time job, trying to have a relationship (unsuccessfully), even dealing with something as simple as going to the store for food and supplies. All while continuing to struggle through one day to the next, feeling like you don't belong, you don't matter, that or no one wants you around. Feeling as if you're nothing but a burden on those around you/ in your life, that or nothing but a nuisance

  • Borderline personality disorder
  • Bipolar 1 (w/ Rapid/ or Ultradian cycling, along with psychotic tendencies)
  • Complex-PSTD (never served, or seen hand-to-hand combat, yet you'd have to hear my story to understand why I was dx'd with this, if interested in knowing)
  • Dissociate Disorder
  • Chronic Depression
  • Agoraphobia
  • Social Anxiety
  • Chronic Insomnia


Not to bore anyone with too much tmi here, yet I've never found anyone who can really relate, or for that matter knows how to interact/ talk with someone with such issues as mine.

We all have our own story's to tell, this is true, yet I spend a great deal of time isolated and alone (given how my issues effect my life on any given day), yet I've found it extremely difficult to open up to those who don't understand these conditions.

I spend far more time with no one to talk/ turn to, where the deafening silence of these four walls becomes too much to deal with, along with racing thoughts/ scenario's which continually play out in my head once something effects me when it comes to my conditions.

Its more like, once triggered, the anger slowly morphs into sadness and despair, the despair later turns into deep depression and self loathing, and before too long, I'm altogether wishing bad things and can't find any comfort from anyone, only able to find solace in sleep. In the hopes tomorrow will be a new day, and with that, new possibilities other then what's already been on my plate, if any of that makes any sense?
Hi I can relate to what you have anxieties,agoraphobia,depression,bipolar,and a mood disorder .I do have anger problems to .The shrink has tried so many meds for that but they dont get rid of my yelling and anger I think it is because of the very bad head injuries I had about 14 years ago.I had staples put in my head,oh yes insomnia to.
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Default Aug 24, 2019 at 02:05 AM
  #6
I used to have a bad anger problem when I was younger. Still get irritable and frustrated easily, yet I do my best to watch my tongue and walk away when able.

I had a brain injury when I was a child as well. Was hit by a moving vehicle (died), yet later was brought back. Was in a coma for over a week, and when I came out of it, I didnt know who anyone was, had to even relearn how to talk and had learning problems from there on.

Doc's told my parents my brain had swelled, and the day they were going to open up my skull to relieve the swelling, it begin to subside on its own. Yet still, had a broke femur, a fairly bad head injury, and had to seek out special ed through elementary school.
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