Why do i feel like everyone hates me whenever I mess up?

It doesn’t even have to be a big thing or anything. For example, a while back I accidentally dropped one of my friends drinks on the ground while we hanging out. I FREAKED out. I panicked and kept profusely apologizing and started crying, I thought she hated me. Also, another example (something that happens frequently) would be when I answer a question wrong from my teacher and I would instantly think they hate me for not knowing. There’s more scenarios/situations where this happens and it’s a common thing for me. I don’t know what it is and why it happens so could someone please explain to me what i’m dealing with.

Hello AureliaUni: Thank you for bringing your concern here to PC. I see this is your first post. Welcome to Psych Central.

You asked why you feel everyone hates you when you mess up. I'm not a mental health professional. So I can't offer you anything in the way of an authoritative response. However my personal non-professional thought on the subject would be that there may be 3 or 4 different possibilities here. Two possibilities, just "off-the-cuff" so to speak, would be that what you are experiencing might be symptoms of depression & / or anxiety. However two additional possibilities might include: low self-esteem & what is referred to as childhood emotional neglect (CEN). At least these are all subject areas you might consider looking into further. Of course to get a professional opinion you would need to see a mental health professional, perhaps a mental health therapist or a psychologist.

Here are links to the self-esteem & the Childhood Emotional Neglect forums here on PC in case you'd like to take a look at them:

https://psychcentralforums.com/steps...r-self-esteem/

https://psychcentralforums.com/child...ional-neglect/

One thing you might do, here on PC, is to take some of the quizzes & tests that are on offer. There's a link to them in the banner at the top of the page. However here's an additional link as well:

Psychological Quizzes and Tests

And then here are links to 6 articles, from Psych Central's archives, on the topics I've mentioned plus links to 2 articles that offer tips for how to stop beating yourself up:

Introduction to Depression | Psych Central

Anxiety Disorders: Symptoms, Types & Treatments | Psych Central

https://psychcentral.com/lib/what-is-self-esteem/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/signs-of-low-self-esteem/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/childh...he-fatal-flaw/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/child...ional-neglect/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...or-messing-up/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...hing-yourself/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

Welcome.

How did I your friends react? Did they try to comfort you and reassure you that it was ok? Have you had the experience of making a minor mistake before and being harshly remprimanded for it?

Welcome to Psych Central! I suspect you might be hating yourself for being a normal human who makes mistakes and then you project those feelings onto others, but I'm not a therapist. I can understand because I used to kind of be that way, too. Just keep in mind that people will not hate you for something like that, and please try not to be mean to yourself. Give yourself the right to be a normal human who is not perfect. Okay?

Hi,
I’m very sorry to hear that you experience this. And I recognize it from myself. I’m not a therapeust, so this is just my thoughts on it; I think it could be due to the ‘awareness’- “theory”: that what you focus on inside feels as though it’s amplified in many situations that might not necessarily have that theme at all... like, for instance, if someone wants to be pregnant and thinks about it all the time, then they might feel like they see babies everyone, and feel like everyone they meet is talking/‘hinting’ about it.

I know that during periods of time where I feel more stable inside and more ‘sure’ of myself, then I tend to read/project the ‘blaming’ in situations a lot less