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MissLiliVancouver
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Default Dec 03, 2018 at 04:37 PM
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Hello everyone. New to this forum and not entirely sure that this is the right place to post, as I don’t have NPD, but I do have ADHD and comorbid mood disorders which may predispose me to attracting narcissists like a magnet.

Though I’ve gotten better at recognizing these folks and minimizing my interaction with them before I get sucked into the usual vortex, I’m still getting over one four years after the fact. I’ve come a long way, but what’s really bugging me these days is this:

WHAT’S UP WITH THE ENABLERS? This person who’s hurt me and many others has more old, loyal friends than anyone I know. At this point, I just want to find a way to release the judgement and anger I feel for some of our mutual friends—who are lovely, compassionate, intelligent people—and their absolute refusal to call out abusive behaviour. Is it that they can’t or won’t see it? Whatever it is, it frustrates and saddens me, as does the fact that he’s apparently capable of and willing to show some people love. Hope this makes sense.

Thanks in advance for any light you can shine on this.
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Smile Dec 03, 2018 at 07:24 PM
  #2
Hello Miss LiliVancouver: I'm sorry I don't think there is any light I can share on what you have experienced. However I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral. I guess all I could suggest is that lovely, compassionate, intelligent people are perhaps at as much risk of being taken in by a narcissist as anyone else would be.

You mentioned having ADHD. There's a forum, here on PC, dedicated to that subject. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/atte...der-add-adhd-/

And then one other forum that may be of interest would be the relationships forum:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.
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Default Dec 03, 2018 at 07:33 PM
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Thank you, Skeezyks ... I may edit this some and post in either of both of those. :-)
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Default Dec 03, 2018 at 09:57 PM
  #4
Welcome to Psych Central MissLiliVancouver. Sorry you are feeling the stress of dealing with difficult relationships.

A note of inforimation: this is the ADHD forum in the first link Skeeyzks gave you. If you want to do a similar or same post, I believe it's better to choose one other forum like relationships that Skeezyks linked to https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/ otherwise it may be flagged for being duplicate post in same forum.

The only power I have ever found is not reacting to others. That seems to take the air out of their balloon when they cannot get a rise out of you. That may be something that takes a lot of time to practice and perfect.

These articles may be of interest
11 Mandatory Rules for Dealing With a Narcissist | Liberation after Narcissistic Abuse

The Dance Between Codependents & Narcissists

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Default Dec 04, 2018 at 06:28 AM
  #5
I'm sorry you're struggling, MissLiliVancouver Perhaps these narcissists you're talking about are just really good at hiding it? Is that possible? I'm sorry you have to deal with these people
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Default Dec 05, 2018 at 02:19 PM
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I think that some are good at hiding it I’m sorry you’ve been hurt

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