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Scienna
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Talking Sep 16, 2020 at 04:48 PM
  #1
When I was in college, I was diagnosed with ADHD. I was in my 20's, and up to that point never had any idea that the condition kids take ritalin for had anything to do with me.

But it was there, lurking beneath the biased perspectives of teachers, counselors, and other adults who could've done something, because hyperactivity doesn't present as commonly in young girls as it does in young boys.

I didn't do the obvious things that interrupted the order of the classrooms. But I certainly lacked a filter when speaking to classmates and teachers ("Oh, that's dandruff!" got a good reprimand). I was frequently told how "bright" and "perceptive" I was, how much "potential" I had, and how if I only "worked harder" I'd get better grades.

Somehow adapting various imperfect coping and defense mechanisms, I got by, which was only possible because even though my single working mother was always exhausted and overwhelmed she still always had my back, encouraged active curiosity, and fostered an ethic of solving most problems by doing it, making it, or building it yourself.

Eventually, without finishing high school, I made it to college. Apparently, being able to choose classes one actually has an interest in makes a huge difference! Even so, it wasn't enough. A semester that included Intro Chemistry broke all those hard-fought mechanisms, and while drowning, someone finally noticed the signs that my head held this ADHD brain. Suddenly, my entire life started to make sense!

I went on a medication, got help in gaining a few accommodations, and learned to develop some time management and organizational strategies to get through school. But even though so many things in my life improved with this discovery, there was still so much I didn't know, and didn't know to ask about.

With youth, more support, and especially more money, there are usually counselors, programs, treatment strategies, etc. that the 'grownups' structure around you, for you.

But, what do you do when you're diagnosed with ADHD as an adult???

Other than the occasional bout of independent internet searching, and reading a single book about ADHD ("Scattered" by Gabor Mate), I didn't really learn much else about the condition. Nor did I anticipate what sorts of related implications, consequences, or obstacles might turn up later...

Only within a couple years after graduating (triumphantly!), while learning how-to-adult and planning my next academic challenges, a somewhat tragically hilarious and ridiculously horrible sequence of events took place that I won't go into here (see the new members section if curious)...

And here I am, a decade later, finally paying close attention to my own Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, all because a friggin virus shattered my already brittle ADHD+C.Grief coping mechanisms...

Okay, so, why the monologue?

I didn't plan on writing so long a post, here. Clearly, I had more to say than expected.

I'm right in the middle of investigating ADHD more deeply than I ever have before, because I finally understand how deeply and thoroughly it is and has been at the root of my behavior and life... One's childhood, remembered and re-contextualized through this new lens, sparks, erm, many complicated feelings...

But the entire reason I started writing this post is to share some of the information I found in videos that enlightened, clarified, and even moved me enough that I felt less alone. It helped me, so maybe it could help you.

This list of videos are all on youtube, are ADHD-related, and have been VITAL in helping me better understand myself, and which I've shared with friends and family who want to understand me better, too.

*Note: If I can't make links because I'm too new to the forums, know these are all youtube videos, so search for the terms in quotes from the youtube site:
A. From the "How to ADHD" channel:
1. "What is ADHD?"
Basic introduction to condition [<4 mins].

2. "How to (Explain) ADHD"
Addresses the misunderstandings [~7 mins].
3. "Failing at Normal: An ADHD Success Story | Jessica McCabe | TEDxBratislava"
A TEDx talk that defines the condition, and challenges many myths about ADHD [~15 mins].

4. "ADHD - approach with science: Tracey Sweetapple at TEDxRockyViewSchoolsED"
TEDx talk addressing the importance of proper diagnoses and potential consequences of missing the diagnosis [~15 mins].

5. "ADHD - Not Just for Kids (Adult ADHD Documentary)"
Covers some of the implications of ignoring or missing diagnoses and treatment; very good, thorough, and informative [~41 mins].
Okay, DONE!!

One last note: It often seems to me that we humans tend to most strongly depend on our sense of sight to evaluate the people and environments around us, since it's the main sense we can use to evaluate what may be in front of us that's some distance away. And it seems we are more inclined to retain whatever that initial first impression was, whether it's actually true or not.

But unless mind-reading is found to be a real thing, there is no way to tell the entire truth, identity, struggles, triumphs, challenges, issues, or tendencies of another human being by appearances or any preconceived notions alone. Only through open and respectful communication can we begin to come a smidgen closer to comprehending the mind of another person...

It's a perspective I try to keep at the forefront of my mind, applicable to any and every situation (not always easy, but ongoing). Given that many of us are here on PC for reasons that aren't necessarily visible in person, I imagine many of you know what I mean...

- Scienna
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sarahsweets
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Default Sep 17, 2020 at 03:34 AM
  #2
I have adhd and I have been on stimulant therapy for 14 years. I agree with what you shared and wanted to note how important it is to find a psyche doc that specializes in adhd and is not afraid of medication therapy. So many doctors diagnose people but are afraid of medication ( which is a first line treatment for adhd with the highest success rate) so they either do not offer medication options at all or they engage in off-label prescribing practices or unfounded "natural" recommendations to treat it. Not that medication is the only solution but it shouldnt be nixed all together just because it falls under the C-II umbrella.

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Default Sep 20, 2020 at 01:04 PM
  #3
@sarahsweets
Thank you for your reply.

I don't know anything about what "C-II" means, but presume it has to do with or falls under the field of psychiatry, in some formal way.

I do have a therapist, but not specifically for ADHD. While I have thought about trying to find someone, or a team of people, to help me deal with my ADHD specifically, I've not followed through on it because I'm afraid of the cost (no health insurance).

All the treatment I have for ADHD is currently just the prescription medication, which I pay for out of pocket. Otherwise, I have no idea how to go about finding any additional support, coaching, etc...

*I'm now trying to look for that support, but am always worried that it'll either be too expensive, or that what I find may not be effective and whatever money paid will be wasted...

Lots of worries, but still trying to work towards some improvement...

How did you go about finding treatment, support, etc.?

Was it a lot of trial and error; did you have help/guidance; what has been working for you, beyond medication?

- Scienna
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Default Sep 21, 2020 at 03:20 AM
  #4
By CII I mean schedule II controlled substances.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scienna View Post
@sarahsweets
Thank you for your reply.

I don't know anything about what "C-II" means, but presume it has to do with or falls under the field of psychiatry, in some formal way.

I do have a therapist, but not specifically for ADHD. While I have thought about trying to find someone, or a team of people, to help me deal with my ADHD specifically, I've not followed through on it because I'm afraid of the cost (no health insurance).

All the treatment I have for ADHD is currently just the prescription medication, which I pay for out of pocket. Otherwise, I have no idea how to go about finding any additional support, coaching, etc...

*I'm now trying to look for that support, but am always worried that it'll either be too expensive, or that what I find may not be effective and whatever money paid will be wasted...

Lots of worries, but still trying to work towards some improvement...

How did you go about finding treatment, support, etc.?

Was it a lot of trial and error; did you have help/guidance; what has been working for you, beyond medication?

- Scienna

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Default Sep 21, 2020 at 01:21 PM
  #5
For me, I didn't get diagnosed until later as an adult. I had been treated for years for mood disorder concerns. I met with a new provider a couple of years ago who suggested ADHD as a possibility and asked me to get neuropsychological testing done. I did well on the testing, which I've learned since is not a surprise as people with ADHD can often do well on those tests because they are new, challenging, and in a controlled environment. Over the course of a couple of years I worked with the provider and my therapist, and the provider tried a number of medications to address my concerns including a non-stimulant for attention issues. The non-stimulant (Wellbutrin) worked for me but I discontinued due to some side effects. As soon as I did my symptoms worsened, so my provider put me on a stimulant and it has been a game changer. He also diagnosed the ADHD at that time, and things have been a lot different since.

I've taken time to gather a lot of information and education about the diagnosis. Not only do I follow the "HowToADHD" youtube channel, but I also participate in the forums there. I also frequently listen to multiple ADHD podcasts and attend the ADDitude webinars. I find that learning about the diagnosis is helpful not only in terms of giving me perspective on some of the challenges I face, but also in helping explain things to me and help me realize I'm not alone.

Other than medication I'm not yet receiving ADHD specific treatment. I have a therapist but we do not work on ADHD as a focus. I am considering starting to work with an ADHD coach but somewhat hesitant since I'm not sure what specific goals I'd have and also because coaching can be expensive. I hope that you're able to find some good direction and support as you continue this journey!
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Scienna
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Default Sep 22, 2020 at 12:28 PM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by quietlylost View Post
Not only do I follow the "HowToADHD" youtube channel, but I also participate in the forums there.
Thank you for replying! I didn't know there were forums... Where do I find that forum??

- Scienna
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Default Sep 22, 2020 at 02:54 PM
  #7
You can go here: How To ADHD
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