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Irlein
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Irlein idontwantthis
 
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Default Feb 28, 2018 at 10:01 AM
  #1
Does anyone else have a hard time distinguishing your PD symptoms from your real character traits? For example I know that I'm an introvert and that's okay and not something I want to change. Sometimes when I'm making plans with friends I realise that I'd rather be alone or quit the plans by lying and telling them I'm sick or some other BS. And I always wonder: Did I do it because I fear failing at conversation? Because I fear they don't like me anymore (for whatever reason)? Or am I just not up for company in general?
Oftentimes I just can't come up with an answer but I would like to know the difference. I'm fine with being a loner but I'd like to be a less avoidant loner.

Anyone?
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Default Mar 01, 2018 at 03:08 AM
  #2
I very much relate. I too am extremely introverted and believe I would choose to spend most of my time pursuing solitary activities even if I didn't have AvPD. I am fine with being an introvert. I think it's the degree to which I'm introverted that is the problem. The average introvert is perfectly capable of having fulfilling relationships and living fully. I think my overwhelming difficulty with these large scale areas is where my AvPD distinguishes itself from typical personality traits.
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Default Mar 01, 2018 at 03:18 AM
  #3
I would have to pretend in order to be something other than an Avie, and that's something that I can't maintain, because my AvPD would make sure of that.

Every thought, every action has been influenced in some shape or another by AvPD.
You might not recognise your AvPD until you are thinking about going against it, otherwise your actions (maybe unaware to you) are done in order to keep your AvPD at a manageable level.

I don't think I have explained myself very well, sorry can't get the words out...my brain has stopped working.

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Diagnosed: AvPD.

It’s never alright. It comes and it goes.
It’s always around, even when it don’t show.
They say it gets better. well I guess that it might.
But even when it’s better, it’s never alright.
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Irlein
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Default Mar 01, 2018 at 04:48 AM
  #4
Quote:
I don't think I have explained myself very well, sorry can't get the words out...my brain has stopped working.
No, I think I know what you mean It hasn't been very long since I've been diagnosed and now I'm trying to be super aware of my thoughts and actions in order to go against it and try to step out of my comfort zone. I just find it hard to know when it's okay to have worries or bad emotions such as embarassment and when it's pathological.
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ReptileInYourHead
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Default Mar 04, 2018 at 07:59 PM
  #5
Hey erlein
It can be tricky to separate true desire from the psychological rewards of neurotic behaviour.
I found that through trial and error I have become aware of false desires.
When a desire pops up, like the desire to cancel hanging out with friends, try both options and be aware of how the results of your choice leave you feeling.
I apologize if this is basic knowledge which we have heard before.
One last thing, if you cancel on your friends using a false excuse could that in itself be a source of disturbance for your psyche?
May you not feel foolish for lying?
Maybe you would feel more at peace with your choice if you told them you just didn’t feel like hanging out...
I think I would.
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Default Apr 28, 2018 at 07:31 PM
  #6

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