[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

F%#^^%^^>>^**€ yesterday and today

I'll second that. Sorry you are struggling

[Tryingtobehappy5]

My day was sh**. I emailed my T last night(while I was drunk so the email had so many errors) to tell her I was going off the meds and how I have been drinking a lot.

This morning she emailed me saying good luck and that therapy doesnt seem to be helping me and asked if there was any point in meeting next week

Then I couldnt focus on anything properly and kept screwing everything up at work which felt even worse when all I wanted was to go home and cry.

My husband took my alcohol to work with him for the night so I dont have anything to drink which is good but feels so bad. When he is on nights I cant leave the house though so its the one time when no matter how bad I want it I cant get any. I know alcohol is so horrible so I do want to stop I just cant seem to sometimes.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Tryingtobehappy5

My day was sh**. I emailed my T last night(while I was drunk so the email had so many errors) to tell her I was going off the meds and how I have been drinking a lot.

This morning she emailed me saying good luck and that therapy doesnt seem to be helping me and asked if there was any point in meeting next week :bawling

Oh god that is terrible, I am so sorry that your therapist couldn't bother to care. Please don't go off your meds they really are helping you even though you don't thank so. Have you talked to Pdoc about the recent issues. I know you don't want to hear it but drinking can and most of the time makes the depressed state worse. Feel better.

[Tryingtobehappy5]

I believe my meds are making me much worse. I have never had issues like I have now before I started meds 2 years ago and Im so tired of it.

I dont plan to tell my pdoc anything at this point, I see no use in that. I have told him before and it doesnt help.

I definitely know how depressed alcohol can make me, I have had more than enough issues because of my drinking to know exactly what it does. I just dont care very much most of the time. Or I see something in my life is not the way I want it to be and start self destructing because I dont want to even be close if I cant have it all.

[Moose72]

I slept all day except to eat lunch. Now its bedtime.

[Wild Coyote]

Yesterday, went to see sleep doc. Followed that by going to see "Bohemian Rhapsody." It's an outstanding movie! I am quite sure it will be nominated for awards.

The same guy who had played Mr. Robot also plays Freddie Mercury.
His name is: Rami Malek!

We then went to a local pub to listen to live music.

Trying to have more fun!


WC

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by Tryingtobehappy5

My day was sh**. I emailed my T last night(while I was drunk so the email had so many errors) to tell her I was going off the meds and how I have been drinking a lot.

This morning she emailed me saying good luck and that therapy doesnt seem to be helping me and asked if there was any point in meeting next week

Then I couldnt focus on anything properly and kept screwing everything up at work which felt even worse when all I wanted was to go home and cry.

My husband took my alcohol to work with him for the night so I dont have anything to drink which is good but feels so bad. When he is on nights I cant leave the house though so its the one time when no matter how bad I want it I cant get any. I know alcohol is so horrible so I do want to stop I just cant seem to sometimes.

OMG, what a terrible T! Going off your meds without pdoc help is never a good idea. I tried that once, and I ended up in a crisis center because a lot of these meds you just can't stop cold turkey. Some of them, you can miss 1 or 2 doses, some even a few more, but then it catches up on you. Thank God I didn't pull that number when I was on Effexor (because that one was tough to stop even with a prolonged taper).

[Victoria'smom]

This morning she emailed me saying good luck and that therapy doesn't seem to be helping me and asked if there was any point in meeting next week. I have a simalar issue, no therapist will work with me if I'm not on medication. I had a T that decided I wasn't making progress and I never went back to her. Now I'm wth out a T. which is dangerous.

My old T told me as long as I showed up then I want help. so please keep that in mind.

[Blueberrybook]

Had a meltdown making tacos for dinner. Not sure why. Thoughts racing and too many things to keep track of cooking at once: taco shells, the meat, the rice, try to chop the veggies in between all this, daughter asking how to solve a confusing math problem. Just too much at once.

I guess at least the tacos turned out OK, but the rice was a loss.

[~Christina]

Thanks EVERYONE for the kind words they really make a difference!

I have cervical and a shoulder problem(s)and went for first Physical Therapy appt. My right side is fine. My left is the problem .... excruciating pain in all kinds of motions. There’s a huge difference

Can’t even get some clothes on without my husband helping. I’m not use to needing help like this.

Anyway they want 2 visits a week but problem is I can’t afford to go. So yeah.

I see Orthopedic Dr for consult tomorrow altho I don’t know what good it will do if I can’t afford to get any help.

This is just another painful problem on top of all my other pain problems just has me losing my shyt today.

[Victoria'smom]

My left is the problem .... excruciating pain in all kinds of motions. There’s a huge difference I'm so sorry you're in so much pain. Is there anything they can do?

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Thanks EVERYONE for the kind words they really make a difference!

I have cervical and a shoulder problem(s)and went for first Physical Therapy appt. My right side is fine. My left is the problem .... excruciating pain in all kinds of motions. There’s a huge difference

Can’t even get some clothes on without my husband helping. I’m not use to needing help like this.

Anyway they want 2 visits a week but problem is I can’t afford to go. So yeah.

I see Orthopedic Dr for consult tomorrow altho I don’t know what good it will do if I can’t afford to get any help.

This is just another painful problem on top of all my other pain problems just has me losing my shyt today.

I hope that the consult goes well, you'll be in my thoughts tomorrow. I'm sorry you feel you are loosing your shyt. I hope you get good answers tomorrow.

[Tryingtobehappy5]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

This morning she emailed me saying good luck and that therapy doesn't seem to be helping me and asked if there was any point in meeting next week. I have a simalar issue, no therapist will work with me if I'm not on medication. I had a T that decided I wasn't making progress and I never went back to her. Now I'm wth out a T. which is dangerous.

My old T told me as long as I showed up then I want help. so please keep that in mind.

I am thinking I will still go. I feel ****** but I want to get better and I dont want to give up. Im worried she has given up though. I do want help but I need to help myself more too, I feel like not drinking tonight was really positive but its only one night so I dont know if I should give myself too much credit and start thinking I will actually do better. I dont think it would be good for me to quit therapy at all.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Thanks EVERYONE for the kind words they really make a difference!

I have cervical and a shoulder problem(s)and went for first Physical Therapy appt. My right side is fine. My left is the problem .... excruciating pain in all kinds of motions. There’s a huge difference

Can’t even get some clothes on without my husband helping. I’m not use to needing help like this.

Anyway they want 2 visits a week but problem is I can’t afford to go. So yeah.

I see Orthopedic Dr for consult tomorrow altho I don’t know what good it will do if I can’t afford to get any help.

This is just another painful problem on top of all my other pain problems just has me losing my shyt today.

You need the help!
Sent you info on PM. I hope it's a viable option for you.

Thinking of you, friend!

WC

[Lefty Seven]

Victory at sea today. Institutional client. My 75-year-old boss doesn't get excited, drink or do drugs, so I had to do it all for her. It's in my job description. I'm not quite done with the drugs.

I stole my personality
From an anonymous source
And I'm gonna pay for it, too
I don't feel bad about that
Give me my chance back

Kano Eitoku (1543-1590)

I slept 11 hrs in total. I meant to take a nap around 5pm and wake up around 6-6:30, but the alarm never went off. So alas, here I am at just past 4:30am.

I kept hearing whispers yesterday. "Shhhhh!" I don't know where they came from, but they were telepathically put in my head. Or maybe they were ghosts entering my brain.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Thanks EVERYONE for the kind words they really make a difference!

I have cervical and a shoulder problem(s)and went for first Physical Therapy appt. My right side is fine. My left is the problem .... excruciating pain in all kinds of motions. There’s a huge difference

Can’t even get some clothes on without my husband helping. I’m not use to needing help like this.

Anyway they want 2 visits a week but problem is I can’t afford to go. So yeah.

I see Orthopedic Dr for consult tomorrow altho I don’t know what good it will do if I can’t afford to get any help.

This is just another painful problem on top of all my other pain problems just has me losing my shyt today.

I'm sorry you are having a hard time. I hope you can get some help for your pain. An orthopedic physical therapist was able to help me with horrible SI (sacroiliac) pain in around 3 weeks, and that was when I was pregnant, so she couldn't use the first options on me. The pain was so bad, I was crying getting out of bed or into or out of the car. But I understand the money issues. It's hard to find anyone willing to do things on a sliding scale or low cost option. I'm lucky here. Even if my insurance won't cover it, we live close to a chiropractic training college, and they will do chiropractic manipulations & massage at low cost. Of course, the trade-off is you have chiropractic students doing the maneuvers on you, but it seems most people who use it do not have problems.

On top of fibro pain, I am sure it doesn't help your mood. I really hope you can find something that helps

I sent an email to my father's girlfriend yesterday. I was very careful about the wording so that it clearly expressed concern for Dad and even her. No negativity at all. Her response certainly reflected comfort and appreciation for my email, but some things she wrote sugar coated some issues and were flat out lies. Ones that reflect enabling behavior. Nevertheless, I hope she feels comfortable in the future contacting me with any concerns. Maybe my email was also useful in pushing the fact that there are serious issues with Dad and that my siblings and I are not satisfied with what's happening and want changes to be made.

We had to take our macaw to the avian vet yesterday. He has an ulcer on his eye. He hates the vet, and hates us giving him medicine almost as much. I don't struggle that much giving him oral medication, but it's tough putting eye drops in his eye without hubby's help. Hubby can help in the morning and evening, but I have to do it twice during the day by myself.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

I sent an email to my father's girlfriend yesterday. I was very careful about the wording so that it clearly expressed concern for Dad and even her. No negativity at all. Her response certainly reflected comfort and appreciation for my email, but some things she wrote sugar coated some issues and were flat out lies. Ones that reflect enabling behavior. Nevertheless, I hope she feels comfortable in the future contacting me with any concerns. Maybe my email was also useful in pushing the fact that there are serious issues with Dad and that my siblings and I are not satisfied with what's happening and want changes to be made.

We had to take our macaw to the avian vet yesterday. He has an ulcer on his eye. He hates the vet, and hates us giving him medicine almost as much. I don't struggle that much giving him oral medication, but it's tough putting eye drops in his eye without hubby's help. Hubby can help in the morning and evening, but I have to do it twice during the day by myself.

I really hope you can get your father the help he needs. It is good that his girlfriend is at least open to discussing his issues even if she doesn’t see or redfuses to acknowledge the big picture. It sounds like you and your siblings have your hands full in regards to keeping your father safe and trying to get him help. I hope you and everyone else can come to a consensus for something to help him. It has to be tough

[Egnito]

I'm new here n I am diagnosed as bipolar. I'm still learning what is bipolar n how to handle it. Mostly I feel depressed...n I am very clingy. I try so hard not to be clingy but I failed myself most of the time.