[sophiebunny]

I've faced a lot of stigma in my life due to mental illness. I was both the child of mentally ill parents and an adult with mental illnesses. I really want to hear about other people's experiences and maybe discuss some coping strategies for it.

[Gabyunbound]

This has been mentioned in another thread, but one of my pet peeves is the misdiagnosis of Bipolar Disorder in the BPD population (from what I have read). No offense intended for anyone who has BPD, and I'm not suggesting that anyone here has been misdiagnosed, but where this does occur, you end up with double-stigma: BPD behaviors and the label of Bipolar Disorder. I don't think it's doing anyone any favors for pdocs to be so lazy in their diagnoses (in some cases).

As far as how I deal with stigma, one example: my cousin and his wife cannot stand my cousin's brother who has BP. They used to bring him up every time I went out with them (when we lived in the same city). The problem is that they would often complain about behaviors that don't necessarily have anything to do with BP and I would call them out on that (gently). I.e. "No, I really don't think that's his Bipolar Disorder, I think that's just the way he is, and Bipolar Disorder only rears its ugly head when one is in an episode, that otherwise, when at one's baseline, you're just 'you.'"

So I think spreading correct information is crucial.

Other than that, I keep it to myself. I have told 2 close family members and 2 close friends, that's it. I've never told anyone at a workplace, much less supervisors; I'm frankly afraid of the repercussions.

I've dealt with mental health issues my whole life. I came from a very dysfunctional family.. I'll leave it at that. I never noticed growing up, but people always would comment about how I tend to ride this emotional rollercoaster. I was first diagnosed with dysthymia and major depressive disorder which then became bipolar. I was blown away. I told some close friends and their response was "Yeah.. you don't think you are? I'm not surprised at all".


Anway-- stigma. Just the fear of losing potential friends, jobs, credibility... it's enough to make anyone crazy. I've disclosed my diagnosis to very few, and never an employee or co-worker. I have to live kind of in my own head more than live life with others -- but there are other reasons for that too.

Some strategies you may look into is A) frequent use of this forum -- the community is amazing and you can get a lot of insight from people who truly understand. B) find a support group in your area for mental health. C) If you trust a person with your diagnosis, educate them as well on what it really means and how it affects you-- help eliminate the stigma by education.

I know my answer doesn't fix any immediate issue or really answer your question that well.. but I wanted to throw in my answer to the mix hoping some of it may help.

[sophiebunny]

I do think that people conflate BPD with manic symptoms of BP. Nothing annoys me more than to be on a bipolar site and have everyone nod in agreement that their rageful, violent behavior happens because they have bipolar disorder, and as a result, friends and family just have to accept it as part of their illness. I literally scream at my computer, "this is where stigma gets born and accepting this behavior makes my life very hard because I'm lumped in with you."

I've had bipolar 1 disorder with psychosis for 40 years. I have been so psychotic and so wildly manic at times I needed to be hospitalized for 2 months. Never, in all my manic episodes, have I ever acted violently or with rage toward another person. I know many people with BP1 for whom this is true as well. Yet, we are wrapped up in this violent, rageful package and it's ruining our relationships and careers.

We have to educate the people in our lives that all the stories they've heard about angry, vengeful, violent people with bipolar disorder is false. That is not our illness. Then describe straight from the DSM V what exactly our illnesses are. First we have to stop the disinformation.

Originally Posted by sheltiemom2007

I do think that people conflate the acting out behaviors of BPD with manic symptoms of BP. Nothing annoys me more than to be on a bipolar site and have everyone nod in agreement that their rageful, violent behavior happens because they have bipolar disorder, and as a result, friends and family just have to accept it as part of their illness. I literally scream at my computer, "this is where stigma gets born and your bad behavior makes my life very hard because I'm lumped in with you."

I've had bipolar 1 disorder with psychosis for 40 years. I have been so psychotic and so wildly manic at times I needed to be hospitalized for 2 months. Never, in all my manic episodes, have I ever acted violently or with rage toward another person. I know many people with BP1 for whom this is true as well. Yet, we are wrapped up in this violent, rageful package and treated accordingly.

We have to educate the people in our lives that all the stories they've heard about angry, vengeful, violent people with bipolar disorder is false. That is not our illness. Then describe straight from the DSM V what exactly our illnesses are. First we have to stop the disinformation, unfortunately promulgated by people claiming to be bipolar.

That's a little harsh of a tone to have. I think maybe you (since you scream at your computer, literally) should take a step back and first identify that bipolar may be someone's main diagnosis and issue, but people are organic and develop issues perhaps a bit outside the realm of criterion from the DSM V, even though it's not the end-all be-all. People feel safe here, and express their issues and confide in others some of their personal and intimate flaws. While you may not have ever associated yourself with rage or violence, that isn't indicative that others haven't or that it is exacerbated by a manic episode, let's say . I agree there is stigma and you're not wrong about that. I just think lashing out at a community of people who are expressing how their issues affect them (maybe another illness or problematic part of their life), through a lens of bipolar, doesn't make them wrong. It makes them human. Co-morbidity between BP and BPD are pretty high, and the criterion can overlap a bunch. Perhaps misdiagnosis? perhaps both? Who the hell cares what we call it, we're addressing others as people -- not a disorder.

I just thought I would pose an argument in the opposite direction.

[sophiebunny]

I was expressing profound frustration at being on the receiving end of the "people with bipolar disorder are violent" trope. Couple that with the ease at which violence is justified by people and the stigma grows. If we don't uncouple the stereotype of violence from bipolar disorder we will never make progress in having our disease treated fairly. People lose jobs, spouses, children, friends in large part because this coupling of anger and violence with bipolar disorder. It's a real problem.

If I came across as harsh, I'm sorry. understand that it is passion to fix what's harming all of us. Ultimately, the answers are in our hands.

[downandlonely]

I find support groups helpful. One I really like is done by the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance: dbsalliance.org. You may want to check out the website and see if you can find a support group in your area.

[tecomsin]

Unfortunately I am one of those people who fulfill the stereotype. I have acted in rage and anger and done things that were harmful both to myself and to other people when I was in a psychotic mania. I have destroyed property including my own when I thought I was being spied upon in my own house. I could go on with other more severe things which landed me in legal trouble. Not all of my manias were that way but the last ones were.

[BP1beauty]

I come from a family that has a history of substance abuse issues and mental health issues . Although I wasn't diagnosed with BP until my mid 20's I believe I started suffering from it as a teen. I ended up losing a job because of a mania episode ( not sleeping for 4 days , extreme paranoia ext. ) I think the best strategy that I use everyday is just really making sure that I'm ok with myself .....people are going to think what they want. Very few people know about my DX and I feel better that way .

[~Christina]

Stigma is stigma is stigma.

The masses will never get it so I choose to stick with my “people” and only try to educate people who truly want to understand as much as a neuro typical can “get it “

Do I like Stigma ? No but I won’t get myself wound up to make myself sick over it.

The BP/BPD issue I think we all have a trait or 2 I think do think maybe more people are diagnosed BP when in fact they are BPD , why you ask ? Meds can only do so much and constant upheaval in life good or bad I see more BPD

A person I feel through a good T can help figure out which side they fall on or on the fence , sure a T can’t diagnose but more often than not a T knows use much better.

Just my opinion

[Travelinglady]

Rage is associated with BPD, so I agree that the two get confused. Isn't it true that bipolar and BPD are often diagnosed together?

[tecomsin]

If it is just one or the other, I think mania is pretty unmistakable, and you need it to be diagnosed with bipolar 1 so my impression is not much confusion between BPD and BP1. Maybe with BP2.

[Row Jimmy]

IMO, the best coping strategy is not telling anyone that I'm MI. As my p-doc says, "it's none of their damn business". I've shared my condition with only one person outside of my family.

[sarahsweets]

I think irresponsible celebrities dont help. So many of them get into trouble and the gossip mags project bipolar on to someone or sensationalize bipolar symptoms. Does anyone remember Britney Spears' meltdown? All they did was make conjectures about her being bipolar. And poor Amanda Bynes was skewered by the press. Cindy Williams had a bipolar episode on a cruise ship. These paparazzi stalkers pop their popcorn, pull up a seat and wait for the other shoe to drop.

[Pookyl]

I don’t really worry about the stigma of MI. If anyone has a problem with my bipolar that’s their problem.
Everyone who knows me knows I have bipolar, I don’t hide it. I’d go so far as to say I cannot hide it.

[Wander]

People just don't get how crippling and life altering it can be. With my skills and intellect (no genius but relatively smart) I should have achieved so much more. Most around me just don't get why I haven't pulled it off. Generally I am blamed, rather than the illness. This leaves me judged unfairly by most people who are close to me, not to mention others who cross paths with me. I have also found that people with different more 'high functioning' versions of Bipolar especially judgemental. I am at this place in my life (age 42) where I am reassessing my path forwards. I simply cannot achieve what I or anyone else expects of me. Looking back my life has been a trainwreck with a few successes but many more failures. It is time for me to live a life with Bipolar that I can find satisfying. Screw what anyone else thinks.

I know stigma against mental illness is quite common. Heck, it's clearly been expressed by the President of the United States and his media outlets.

My family has quite a history of mental illness. I can firmly state that six people in my family have had significant mental illness issues, actually more than that have had issues mentioned in the family. And yet, even within my family, denial, embarrassment, distrust, misunderstanding, and criticism have been expressed about those of us who struggle. Many in my family consider themselves conservatives. I do not believe any are far right conservatives, but some do make statements that are disconcerting to me. I've had to defriend two of my aunts on Facebook because of that. I've had to listen to my own brother and father talk about how people are "leeches on society", and yet not directly be referring to me as one. They are liberal in other ways, though. [I'm not saying all conservatives believe the "leeches on society" view.]

I was in a diner one day a few years ago. Just passing by me, he expressed racist views and stigma against mental illness in two sentences, referring to another customer in the diner. He was not showing racism towards me, nor was he implying I had a mental illness. He didn't know I had a mental illness, nor did he know I was appalled at his racist statement against that other customer. He stated that "I worked in X psychiatric hospital and know what those crazies are all about!" Well, I had been in that psychiatric hospital, as well as another many times. I'll confess I said absolutely nothing to him. I believe that was my best choice of action.

Regarding violence in bipolar disorder, I definitely agree that violence is not a common symptom. However, violence during bipolar irritable states does not mean a person definitely has BPD. Firstly, a person can be prone to violence even without a personality disorder. Secondly, irritable states of hypomania/mania, and perhaps some types of depression, especially mixed, can lead to violent displays in people who otherwise wouldn't show them. Irritability sounds like a mild kind of word, but in bipolar states it does sometime go way beyond grumpy and snappy. Manic people can be triggered to throw things and hit things (maybe even people, in some cases). They can even be triggered to cause harm towards themselves. BUT, that person may not have been triggered by anything relating to relationships or emotional triggers. They may not have any other BPD symptom that is pretty much required for that diagnosis. They may not ever be violent outside of the irritable manic/hypomanic states that would have clear beginnings and endings within several day/week/month long periods. Ultra ultra rapid cycling is possible, but rare.

I've shown violent displays during mania, particular mixed mania, but I definitely do not qualify for a BPD diagnosis. I'll admit that my violent displays almost exclusively involved hitting or throwing things (not people), or myself. There was one time I threw a wallet at my husband and sort of fought against him when he was trying to restrain me from running outside at night in the winter, barely clothed and barefooted, during a manic episode. There were a couple other times I gave the psych hospital security staff a bit of a difficulty when they were dragging me into the isolation room for an emergency injection. This is not at all totally rare in psychotically or even just severely manic people, and does not mean "He/she is Borderline". But yes, I agree such violence is not the norm. I only saw it happen to one other person during my 10 psych hospitalizations. And I am not a violent person by nature. Full blown mania and psychosis do indeed get ugly sometimes. It's not only always just about buying 100 snake kits, talking like a motor mouth, and thinking you're Jesus for all people with bipolar disorder. Even not all people with bipolar type 1 experience mania and psychosis the same. It is a shame that the smaller percentage of people that do show violence feed stigma. And yet, please don't stigmatize the ones who've shown violence, if you never have.

Back in 2014, I attended a class at my local adult school. During that class, I was shocked to hear clear stigma against the mentally ill. At the time, I hadn't been doing well at all, so it was very painful. What made it worse was that the instructor was a psychologist. She made several statements that were shocking to everyone in the class. I just outlined the following in a letter I sent to the adult school administration:
----

Greetings!

I do not know where to send this e-mail, so I’m wondering if you can redirect it appropriately.

I attended both of the classes for the Declutter Your Life and Reduce Stress course. The content in the first class was quite useful and motivated me to start a cleanup project. I will admit that the instructor was a notably extreme motormouth, but I managed to absorb most all of what she said, despite. Unfortunately, though, I did catch one thing she said that I found quite offensive. She made a negative comment about people with bipolar disorder. I found that strange coming from the mouth of a psychologist, and very out of place and inappropriate in a classroom setting.

The second class was definitely not as helpful. She raced through the content at lightening speed. I was unable to process what she was saying. She talked about personal things including not loving her mother, but that I can look past with just a bit of shock. But while describing her mother she described being beaten by her, and then casually stated something like “Well, she is bipolar.” A second stigmatic statement about bipolar disorder. I was infuriated and spoke up in a nervous shaky voice stating that “Having bipolar disorder and hitting are not necessarily related.” And why on earth was she even talking about such things?

I have bipolar disorder, my sister does, my nephew does and my paternal grandmother did. We suffered a lot. I know that stigma is still alive throughout the country in regards to mental illness, but shame on her as a psychologist attempting to pass it on.

At the end of the class, the instructor announced she was passing out instructor evaluations. I decided to stand up and leave. Writing a frank evaluation that she would see and possibly discard felt very uncomfortable for me. I was highly upset and shaking at the time, anyway. That is why I’m writing to you.

Thank you for your help in directing this e-mail to the appropriate person. My primary complaints are outlined above, but if someone would like to contact me they may do so at this e-mail address.

My name

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I have no idea what caused the instructor's parent to be violent, but I definitely did not like that she, a psychologist, was indeed equating bipolar disorder with violence in front of a classroom of students. Frankly, I believe the instructor was unwell at the time. What her exact issue was, I can only speculate about. I did hear back from the adult school, and the instructor was let go. Does that possibly sound like a sad result to you? It does to me, but it was for the best.