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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2013
Location: KY
Posts: 3,667
10 3,076 hugs
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Feb 11, 2019 at 11:30 PM
#1
This nervous energy is killing me. I want to curl in a ball on the floor and rock one minute, cry, then act goofy af the next minute. I don’t know where it’s coming from. Plus things are feeling less and less real more and more often. I just know the worse is coming. Everyone around me is optimistic and I don’t get it. If history has its way, there is nothing to be optimistic about. I guess I have time and the skill of my absolutely amazing doctor to tell. Someone please tell me this will turn out alright.
__________________ ***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
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 Wild Coyote
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: Milky Way
Posts: 4,746
9 2,611 hugs
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Feb 11, 2019 at 11:45 PM
#2
When do you see your pdoc next? It sounds like an urgent visit is in order. This sounds like a horrible experience. You are the best person to know what it means and may lead to at this point. You have gone through so much in your life and survived it, with regards to your illness, so yes I believe it will be alright in the end. Still, you need help right now as going through this on your own is unfair.
Is there anything you have done in the past that has helped a state like this? Like distraction etc?. __________________ Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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| cashart10, Wild Coyote
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 cashart10
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Florida
Posts: 5,057
7 970 hugs
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Feb 11, 2019 at 11:47 PM
#3
You will be OK Cash. Listen to your mental health team.
__________________ Guiness187055 Moderator Community support team |
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| cashart10, Wild Coyote
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AspiringAuthor, cashart10, Wild Coyote
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,433
11 9,557 hugs
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Feb 12, 2019 at 11:28 AM
#4
It WILL be ok cash. You have survived everything you’ve been through so far. Trust your treatment team. Reach out to them if needed. Take time off work if needed. Do the IOP if needed. Trust what they are telling you and you WILL be ok. Many hugs to you.
__________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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| cashart10, Wild Coyote
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cashart10, Wild Coyote
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2013
Location: KY
Posts: 3,667
10 3,076 hugs
given
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Feb 12, 2019 at 11:41 AM
#5
Thank you all! I have been in contact more with both my pdoc and my t and I have an appt to be evaluated at the hospital in the morning for IOP. I am nervous. I have no idea why except perhaps I haven’t done IOP in several years. I am anxious about what time will tell.
__________________ ***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
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| Victoria'smom, Wild Coyote, wildflowerchild25
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Wild Coyote
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Member
Member Since Dec 2015
Location: Indiana
Posts: 473
8 5 hugs
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Feb 12, 2019 at 09:07 PM
#6
Hang in there.
Glad are reaching out for help. |
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| cashart10
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cashart10
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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