[yellow_fleurs]

Good Morning! My car broke down so no acupuncture for me today. Well, it stalled and worked after jumping it. The battery and alternator are fine I was told so I am wondering if it is a wire or alternator belt maybe? Need to get it checked out.

I had a good time a therapy yesterday, I was in a super chipper mood and had less obsessive thoughts so we were kind of able to talk about my situation while I was in a good place mentally. It allowed us to talk more about the overall issues I was experiencing and the plan. I learned that my obsessive and compulsive issues started much younger at least as early as 15 when I developed an eating disorder. It really was like a compulsion. I also remember other signs of OCD from when I was younger although I am not sure if they would met diagnostic criteria. I am kind of relieved to be getting treatment for this after at least 16 years. Sounds like we are going to do Exposure Response Prevention therapy which is a proven treatment for OCD. I think I will end up with that official diagnosis based on our conversation. Also, still not sure about the bipolar disorder, we will just have to wait and see. I hope writing about OCD on this bipolar board is not too out of place, especially since my bipolar diagnosis is now in question once more. I mean I don't think my psychiatrist is questioning it at all, but my therapist is getting a different perspective of me off of medication, so I am also wondering her opinion.

Happy weekend everyone! Time for breakfast and coffee and trying to diagnose my car myself (haha I was successful at this only one other time in my life).

[tecomsin]

I feel more comfortable and safe cutting down the small dose of olanzapine at night wearing my new fitbit. I cut back from 1.25 mg to half of that last night and the night before. (This means cutting the pills into quarters with my pill cutter.) But I got over 8 hours of sleep in both cases so I will continue on 1/4 for awhile to make sure my sleep is stable before I cut back to zero.

I want to get off of olanzapine as it causes my blood sugar to rise and I don't want to become a diabetic.

I noticed more anxiety yesterday morning than usual and some intrusive thoughts yesterday about catastrophic things that could happen in my life.

I will be seeing my son tomorrow for my birthday. He just accepted a new job in town and it is a big pay raise and promotion for him. They also all have sit/stand desks and ergo furniture at his new workplace so that will be good for his back pain.

I don't feel that well today. I have menstrual cramps and a headache and feel bummed that my mood has headed downward these past couple weeks and that my Seroquel XR dose had to increase.

I am also bummed about my weight gain. I'm generally pretty easy on myself about my weight, but I have exceeded the weight range I am OK with.

[Scooter9]

Originally Posted by tecomsin

I will be seeing my son tomorrow for my birthday. He just accepted a new job in town and it is a big pay raise and promotion for him. They also all have sit/stand desks and ergo furniture at his new workplace so that will be good for his back pain.

Happy birthday tecomsin and congrats to your son!

Happy birthday, tecomsin!

[BeyondtheRainbow]

happy Birthday Tecomsin!

[Victoria'smom]

Happy birthday Tecomsin

[downandlonely]

Happy birthday @tecomsin

[Nammu]

I missed that! Happy Birthday tecomsin.

[GoldenSnitch]

Happy birthday tecomsin!!

[fern46]

Tecomsin, congrats to your son. That's wonderful news. Happy birthday!!! May it be a wonderful one.

[Unrigged64072835]

Happy birthday, tecomsin! Glad to hear about your son's job, too.

The past couple days have been busy. Finally finished sewing a knit top, first time ever. It wasn't that good, but I finished it and didn't throw it in the trash. Hopefully the next project will be either, as I need new shorts for the summer.

Been busy with house stuff as well.

Hope all is going well with you all. Love and hugs to everyone.

Wander--"Chasing Cars" just popped up on my playlist. Hope you're doing better.

I'm home in bed sick. I want the window open because of the weather, but some people seem to think they can have a tailgate party in their parking lot. The music they're playing is horrible! Some the women also occasionally scream/squeal for no good reason. I wish they'd go elsewhere.

I am cook of the household. If I'm too sick to cook, my husband won't. He just said "I'll eat bread and butter." And he likely will. Kind of a Czech thing. But I get nothing. If I do get up and finally cook something for myself he'll appear. I guess I have to make something quick he won't eat, like a peanut butter and preserves sandwich.

[yellow_fleurs]

BirdDancer I think he should at least make you some bread and butter, too! Sorry you are sick, hope you feel better soon.

[Wander]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I ****ed up today. I hurt my husband's feelings again. I want to ball up and cry. Instead I took an ambien. I have to be careful not to get addicted. At the same time I really don't care. I wish I could put into words what I'm feeling. I need help but I suck. I want my "loud" head back, I don't want to feel bad for not feeling. I want the outgoing me back. I'm going to stop the zyprexa staying only on the lamictal. I need to feel something except just bad for not feeling. Maybe IOP? I may just wait until my son leaves for the summer. I might just go back to my old clinic so I can get abilify shot. So many thoughts I'm drowning

Im so sorry you are suffering. It is like you are in a bind. I hate the numb feeling when it hits me, especially when it doesn’t stop. It’s understandable you want to stop Xyprexa but I would talk to your pdoc first. I hope you find relief soon.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

4 hours of sleep and awake. Again. Ugh. Just took PRN. Hopefully I'll knock back out. Better quit screen time.

Did you get anymore sleep ?

[~Christina]

Happy Birthday Tecomsin !!!!!

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Checking in. I’ve had a wonderful day doing errands with my 83 year old mom. She is very frail right now but between the two of us...were getting it done.

We’re going to a Mad Hatter’s luncheon at church tomorrow with the proceeds going to charity. Everybody wears unique hats. I’ve wanted to go for the last three years but it sells out quickly. I have a nice black suit and a while silk shirt with a chic black and white hat. I’m going for a Paris vibe....sunglasses and all. Looking forward to it.

Warm wishes to all for a peaceful weekend.

@Jennifer 1967


HOw was the mad hatters luncheon? Did your mom enjoy it?
bizi

[TheSeaCat]

Happy Birthday Tecomsin!!!! Hope you had a great birthday; also congratulations to your son on the new job.

[yellow_fleurs]

I spent my entire Saturday trying to figure out taxes, I have always done them myself before but realized this year is too tricky with my situation and also I think I messed up last years. I was a resident of one state, temp resident of another, and interned in a third. Went back and looked and I totally didn't do state taxes right. I did them late last year, too, I just was in such a bad place I couldn't even care at that time. Time to hire someone, I think. Car is in the shop, also realized I don't have time to try to fix that myself and if it's electrical that's too complicated for me. I hope these things are not too expensive, they're not in my budget haha.

Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday. I am seeing my friend which should put me in a good mood I believe.