[GoldenSnitch]

Today is my birthday. So I spent the afternoon and evening with my daughter and family which was nice. One of the better days I’ve had lately.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Happy birthday Golden Snitch. I'm glad you had a better day.

[wildflowerchild25]

Happy birthday goldensnitch!

[tecomsin]

Happy Birthday GoldenSnitch. Mine today as well. Mine didn't start out that great but turned in to a fine day. My son took me out for Sushi and had some flowers delivered to the house, so it was very nice in the end. I got to learn more about the new job he will be starting soon. He is working on an important project that could change our everyday lives and has a lot to learn and room to grow with his new company.

[Nammu]

Happy Birthday golden

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Originally Posted by bizi

@BeyondtheRainbow


Thank you for sharing.
Crying can be quite cathartic. Do you feel better for crying?
How old was your father?

Share more if you are up to it.
bizi

Thanks Bizi.

That actually is still the only time I've really cried. I'm surprised but feel less on the verge of tears than I had been. I've listened to the music a good bit and let myself remember. Because he was abusive good memories are hard to find and I've been trying to focus on them this week. They make me sad too but better than the hurt, angry memories that are most of what I remember of him. Easter will bring back a lot of memories; he did Easter well. He'd hide eggs 3-4 times if we wanted and he hid them in hard places so that usually at least one turned up in the summer. Definitely the best holiday memories.

My therapist told me that the stages of grief aren't really for the grieving but for those who are dying. And it doesn't feel like going through stages, more floating in and out of different feelings.

I don't know what comes next. Tomorrow is therapist day so I'm sure we'll work on whatever the next step needs to be.

This is one of the most confusing things I have ever gone through.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

.... he did Easter well. He'd hide eggs 3-4 times if we wanted and he hid them in hard places so that usually at least one turned up in the summer. Definitely the best holiday memories.

My therapist told me that the stages of grief aren't really for the grieving but for those who are dying. And it doesn't feel like going through stages, more floating in and out of different feelings.

I don't know what comes next. Tomorrow is therapist day so I'm sure we'll work on whatever the next step needs to be.

This is one of the most confusing things I have ever gone through.

I am glad that you have some good easter memories.....
This is hard work that you are doing.

You are worthy of this effort.
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[TheSeaCat]

Happy Birthday Golden Snitch!!!!!!!

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Yes, TG. Well, Thank Xanax anyway, lol.

It happened again last night. Took some melatonin and gabapentin too. I know it was late in the game to do the melatonin, but I figured it wouldn't hurt. I need to get back to those solid nights of actual sleep. Can't seem to figure out the "recipe" of elements (time, dark etc). I think I might see if they will keep me off the late shift so I can keep things more consistent...

Thanks for asking! I forgot to update.


How's your sleep doing these days?

Yay ! Glad you got some more. Yes yes it’s tricky to find the right set of shyt that works consistently. I would imagine not doing late shift would benefit you. I always needed time to relax/unwind/de stress before I can possibly even inch towards sleep. Hope your schedule can be worked out.

Any news on a new job ? Some places take forever to do interviews.

My sleep is pretty good I’m just flipped but hey I can clean at 9 Pm just as I could at 9 am LOL

Here’s to hoping your sleep improves

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

A warm hello to all!


I truly miss everyone here at PC. I am hoping to be able to come back soon.


The dissociation is letting up a bit, which is a relief.


I have been trying a med named "Mirapex." It takes quite awhile to build it up to the correct dose (which is very individual). Then it usually takes some time after one has found the right dose. Not sure of how one would know what their own correct dose might be. Trial and error.


I am on several psych meds now, along with other meds.


Am acting out my dreams like crazy! It's often funny. However, all of the vehicle keys are hidden at night and my bedroom windows (2nd floor) are blocked so they will not open much. I am told "flying" dreams are frequent, even when we don't recall them and... they'd prefer I did not have the opportunity to act out this one. In my case, this appears to be a side-effect of the Mirapex.

'

I hope to be back soon and more often. Am still struggling.


Much Love to All!



WC

So good to see you

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

Hope things get better, WC.


I.need.SLEEP.


Up at 1 AM this time. Still can’t go back to sleep, even for a short nap. Groggy but awake.


Not fun.

Hope you get some pronto !!! Not sleep is just awful

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Happy birthday tecomsin!!


I’ve been doing well. Had a great birthday. Yesterday I finally got to see my brother and sister in law and niece for the first time since January. I was salty at them for awhile because they cancelled on me the last time I was supposed to hang out with them and amidst my “let’s drop down to five mgs haldol” paranoia I thought he had lied to me about the reason. I still am not sure but I don’t suppose it matters anymore. We had a great time. I left about 8:30 when they started to get messy drunk because things started to spiral so I wanted to get out of there before any fights started.


I had a dream a couple of days ago about being a teacher and going back to school to finish my masters and I’m reLly thinking about it. If I stayed as a teacher assistant I wouldn’t be too stressed out at work to get my schoolwork done. I already have three classes under my belt. The only thing is I would have to contact the state and see if I can get my provisional certification back since I lost it for not finishing the program again. And I would have to do student teaching which would mean I wouldn’t be able to work a normal day job for a semester. I also never withdrew from the one class because I was too depressed to handle anything involving school so there a big fat F on my transcript. I’m not sure if I could get that erased if i got records from the IOP I was in at the time proving I was disabled when I took the class.


So many things to think about. But I desperately want my masters, even if I never teach with it again. I just want it. I want to prove that I can. I’m not entirely sure that I can but I want to give it a shot.


Ah well. I’ll keep thinking about it.

Follow your dreams

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by GoldenSnitch

Today is my birthday. So I spent the afternoon and evening with my daughter and family which was nice. One of the better days I’ve had lately.

Happy Birthday!!!!

[~Christina]

I’m still fine off Latuda I’m in the stage of brain working sans med so far everything is okay!

I will say my appetite has plummeted huge! I have to remind myself to eat, I’m not grazing anymore. I doubt I have lost much thus far but I’m glad to know that infact the weight neutral is BS advertising.

My days and nights are flip flopped but what do I care ! I can clean at 9 pm just as easy as 9 am. I am sleeping very well so for that i am grateful.

I leave for vacation on the 15 th I am so excited!!! A trip besides going to Florida to see the kids. I do miss them but it was time to do something just my husband and I ..

Hugs and cookies to all !

I'm really feeling the depression and anxiety today. Skipped another class, fifth in a row because of the hospitalizaiton. I don't think I'm going back. I need to apply for disabiility.

Christina, thanks for sharing about Latuda. My pdoc may be offering me alternatives to Seroquel XR in the future. I'm glad to collect feedback on newer meds I've never tried.

spikes, I'm sorry your hospitalization made you fall behind in classes. Is it a graded class? Maybe you can ask for a "withdrawal" and just take a recovery break and try again. I should think a hospitalization would be a valid excuse.

[hopeless2015]

Happy Birthday tecomsin and goldensmitch!!

WC..good to see you post!!

I'm doing ok

Hugs to all.

I have been feeling unwell for a number of days, physically and mentally, but I'm a little better today. I'm going to do some things, but not overdo anything.

I doubt it's related, but I stopped my mini dose of Ativan a few days back. I had only been taking 0.13 mg for a while (1/4 of a 0.5 mg pill, which is the smallest). I doubt that has anything to do with this, but I'm obviously wondering a little. I confess my psychiatrist did not tell me I could stop. In fact, he raised my Seroquel XR a little last week, which I have been taking as he directed. The day before yesterday, I felt so anxious at one point that I took 1 full milligram of Ativan as an "as needed", but none since.

I have yet to reschedule my private French lesson I missed last week. I definitely will return. What gets me is that I asked for possible alternative days in my last week's cancellation email, but the teacher ignored that and only wished me improved health. It's so common that you ask questions and responders only answer one or just a couple of all you posed. That's fine in some cases, but not others. Now I have to ask a second time. I am procrastinating doing that.

Update: This may seem odd given above, but I just signed up for a one evening seminar about recovering from set backs in life and using them to your advantage. It's presented by a therapist/life coach. It's later this week. Tomorrow I have the third lecture of a six-part lecture series on modern China topics. I really do plan to go, unless I've very sick. The topic is interesting. As told in a story last week, my old psychiatrist (15 years ago) and current psychiatrist may be there, not that I will approach them, unless I go nuts. It's just coincidence that they signed up for the lecture series.

[Innerzone]

Happy Birthday, GoldenSnitch!!

Also wishing you a happy birthday, GoldenSnitch! Enjoy your special day!