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Blueberrybook
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Default Mar 21, 2019 at 02:25 PM
  #1
Not sure if it's stress from the recent area plant fires/benzene in the air or what, but my mood is really going downhill this week

I'm supposed to start therapy again and was supposed to go last Saturday morning, but my therapist had to cancel because she was ill. I was supposed to have therapy today, but my therapist had to cancel because she lives in the town where the plant fire occurred, and they had a shelter-in-place in effect. She called and said we'd better reschedule for next week because no one knows just what will be going on tomorrow, and yeah, it wouldn't surprise me if they don't close school again or have to issue more shelter in place warnings. Who knows?

I don't have anyone to talk to about a lot of my feelings except my T. H tries to understand, but I don't think he gets bipolar at all. Now I've got to wait another week to see the T

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two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
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And that has made all the difference.
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UpDownMiddleGround
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Default Mar 21, 2019 at 02:58 PM
  #2
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blueberrybook View Post
Not sure if it's stress from the recent area plant fires/benzene in the air or what, but my mood is really going downhill this week

I'm supposed to start therapy again and was supposed to go last Saturday morning, but my therapist had to cancel because she was ill. I was supposed to have therapy today, but my therapist had to cancel because she lives in the town where the plant fire occurred, and they had a shelter-in-place in effect. She called and said we'd better reschedule for next week because no one knows just what will be going on tomorrow, and yeah, it wouldn't surprise me if they don't close school again or have to issue more shelter in place warnings. Who knows?

I don't have anyone to talk to about a lot of my feelings except my T. H tries to understand, but I don't think he gets bipolar at all. Now I've got to wait another week to see the T
I'm sorry that you are having such hard time. Was your therapist willing to talk to you by phone? I know that is not best but it has gotten me through some tough times until I could get in the office.

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Default Mar 21, 2019 at 04:20 PM
  #3
I didn’t ask her about the phone thing as I didn’t think about it. I don’t know if that would work for me though. I think for me, it’s just a lot better in person. I think it’s not just the talking with somebody but the facial expressions and body language too. I hear things like voice inflections, but either I notice more visually or it makes me more comfortable or helps my overall understanding if that makes sense? I know too from talking with her last fall that my therapist grew up in that town and still has a lot of family living there, and she could be stressed out herself, so I am not sure if a phone session would be that helpful right now.

This week has only had one day on a normal type schedule, with my daughter in school, and even then, I had to go to the dermatologist as H had noticed a mole that he thought had changed, which the doctor removed for biopsy along with one other (I have a lot of moles given my coloring), so that wasn’t exactly the most relaxing day on the books. I also had a rheumatologist appointment scheduled tomorrow, and her office called and canceled it, saying the practice was just going to close tomorrow given the state of matters. My fibromyalgia has been acting up (probably the stress of Spring Break added to this week) but a bit before that so I had been wanting to discuss it with her, so now I have to reschedule that appointment too..sigh...

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Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD

Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost
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Default Mar 21, 2019 at 05:20 PM
  #4
I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Blueberrybook I understand it must be very hard for you. Please don't give up. I know it's hard. Just try to hang on a little longer, at least until you can see your therapist again. I'm really happy that you're seeing one! I hope she will be able to help you. It helps to have someone who can listen to us and understand us! I completely agree with what UpDownMiddleGround has already wisely said better than I ever could. Try to see if you can do a session on the phone. I know you've already said you're not a big fan of that. I'm not either. I completely understand what you mean. Still, if you feel bad, I'd say trying to do a session on the phone instead of just skipping one may prove to be more useful to you. After all, you have nothing to lose by trying, right? That's just my opinion, though. The final decision is up to you. Just try to hang on a little longer. I hope things will get better soon for you. We're here for you if you need to talk about it. I know it's not the same thing as having a support system IRL, but at least it's something. Try to keep yourself busy until you can see your therapist. Stay safe and take good care of yourself. You deserve to get better and to feel good. You deserve to live a good life just like everyone else. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Blueberrybook. You're a strong, wonderful person. You don't deserve to suffer at all. I'm sure you'll be able to get through all of this. Keep fighting! You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! I believe in you! We all believe in you! We're all rooting for you! Please don't give up! Try to hang on! You're a strong, wonderful person!
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Default Mar 21, 2019 at 06:04 PM
  #5
I'd rather hold out for the in-person session than a phone session. I know she probably wouldn't charge me for a phone session, but things are crazy. Plus, I found out my daughter's school cancelled again tomorrow. Maybe we can schedule for earlier in the week next week, but she did tell me she was having to re-schedule a lot of clients, which isn't exactly a shocker.

If I get into too much of a downspin, I know I can call her any time for an emergency session over the phone, even over the weekend or at 3 AM if I need to. Right now, at least, I am not at emergency level. I think once my schedule gets back to what I expect, I'll feel a lot less stressed. I hate schedule changes, especially when they are sudden and unexpected.

I've had a hard March too with my teeth. I had crown work on 2 adjacent bottom teeth March 1, and I've had tooth pain (to varying degrees) since then. Then, I got a 3rd crown done (same side of mouth but on top not bottom). I had severe nerve pain (the dentist thought I might need a root canal for awhile), but it seems like it is finally starting to calm down though some days it hurts more than others though I've now gotten all 3 permanent crowns placed. So having tooth nerve pain practically all month has not helped me one bit. I see the dentist next week just to check on things, but I'm optimistic as I can now drink tap water normally and finally eat soft foods on that side of my mouth and take regular Tylenol instead of Tylenol with codeine for pain. That's been another stressor.

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Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD

Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I -
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost
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