[Theroadlesstraveled]

I’ve been feeling pretty stable lately. I even recently said that I could never imagine feeling depressed again as things just seemed alright. This morning, for no apparent reason, I woke up in tears. I feel like my brain has been split in half. I love my children dearly, but wish I had never become a mother. What kind of a mother feels this way? I have 5 children. Two have autism. Three of my children are “adults”. Their needs are endless. Endless. I’m absolutely exhausted all the time from trying to support them. I have no one to support me. My husband has just checked out when it comes to the adults. We still have two younger kids at home and he’s good with them. At some point, I just need my young adult children to grow up and be self-sufficient. I don’t want life to continue as it is. There doesn’t seem to be much I can do to change certain things.

I’m trying hard to take care of myself. I’m working on exercising daily and brushing my teeth as well as showering. These are areas of struggle for me.

I just feel so depressed and hopeless today. I feel like people in a class I’m taking are judging me harshly and I can’t tell if this is real or my insecurity. I just need some friendly words.

please remember to take care of yourself and relax.

I am sure you are a great mom.

looking after 5 is a lot of work and I'm sure they apreciate it.

you can only do your best.

[~Christina]

Be kind to yourself.

Can you talk to your husband about how overwhelmed you are ?? Maybe he can help you out more ?

My daughter is 27 and really doing well thankfully , she has had some rough spots being a “ grown up” at times.... she also has Bipolar.

Are you seeing a Therapist ? I know I’d be a mess if I didn’t have mine. At least for that 1 hour it’s ALL about me..

I hope things settle down for you.

[Theroadlesstraveled]

I realized that I fell into paranoia that people can see my mental illness by looking st me and that people are looking at me differently. I drove around all afternoon because I didn’t know where to go or what to do. I haven’t felt this way in a very long time. I called my pdoc and spoke with her nurse. Now I feel paranoid that she miscommunicated with my doctor and that they have unkind thoughts towards me. I feel so crazy. I just took a triple dose of risperdal to see if I can make this go away. I’m supposed to start Wellbutrin tomorrow but the rx never made it to the pharmacy. I’m too afraid to call my dr’s nurse again. I just need this feeling to pass. To make matters worse, I have a temp of 102.5. I was exposed to influenza. I hope I just have a cold.

[UpDownMiddleGround]

My T always asks me if I'm physically ill whenever my mood shifts. Maybe if you take care of your fever/flu, you will feel at least a little better.

[Theroadlesstraveled]

My fever is gone today and I’m doing better. One day at a time.

[Travelinglady]

Hope you'll feel better soon. Welcome to Psych Central!