[franz kafka]

There is a supernatural entity out to get me. It is a hired assassin, a bounty hunter, but I don't know who is behind it. It mainly inhabits a parallel universe but can telepathically influence this world. I like to think of The Entity as a bureaucrat... he's just doing his job without much enthusiasm. He isn't particularly creative. He uses the same tactics every time: inserting suicidal thoughts into my head and trying to convince me that they are my own.

The Entity monitors me mainly through artificial lighting, but it has been known to show up in reflections of natural light as well.

In the past, the only way to get rid of The Entity was to find a safe place where it can't make me act on its suicidal thoughts. But I can't keep running to the hospital whenever it shows up again. This time I'm going to try to ride the wave and hope an increase in medication will squash the urges.

Right now The Entity is putting self-harm and suicidal thoughts into my head. I can sense it through the lights.

Any kind words or advice for dealing with this situation are much appreciated.

[Victoria'smom]

If you decide you need it don't hesitate to go to the hospital.

Put away anything you can hurt yourself with.

Try to relax and ignore the entity.

[fern46]

I am sorry you are experiencing this. It must feel scary and very uncomfortable. Please do not hesitate to leave and get help if the urges get stronger. I know you don't want to run, but this sounds like a very dangerous situation. I believed I was being manipulated by entities when I was in the middle of psychosis and I displayed very dangerous behavior as a result. Getting help saved my life and protected my family.

I pray all the time. You are in my prayers that a much more powerful and benevolent entity will be with you on your journey. Blessings.

[Sunflower123]

I agree with the previous posters. Please do not hesitate to get help if it becomes overwhelming because it could get dangerous for you should the urges get stronger. I do understand your statement about going to the hospital. I have frequent SI and it’s not feasible for me to go to the hospital every time it happens. I’ve learned to ride the wave fairly well.

You seem to have enough self-knowledge and the support of us here to know when you need to seek help. Please take care and stay safe. You are in my thoughts and prayers as well.

[still_crazy]

i pray a good bit, too. have you tried doing art work, something spiritual, writing...

personally, i think you should definitely adjust the Rx treatments with a psych and all, but I think finding a way to engage and understand the entity, perhaps integrate it or banish it (?) might be helpful...deal with it on a Jungian level, I gues. just a thought.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

How are you doing now? The clozapine increase should work pretty quickly so if the entity isn't going away you probably should either call the dr again or go to the ER to get your meds adjusted. Don't let it go too long; no need to suffer.

[Pookyl]

I end up ip every time I am mixed.
Be kind to yourself. Going ip works for you (and me) andultimately getting well quickly is the end goal.

[fern46]

How are you doing today? I hope you were able to get some rest.

[franz kafka]

I'm doing a lot better today. Not sensing the entity as much. I think the increased clozapine helped a lot.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by franz kafka

I'm doing a lot better today. Not sensing the entity as much. I think the increased clozapine helped a lot.

So glad your feeling better today.

[Pookyl]

Hey Franz, how’re things going?

[franz kafka]

The Entity has receded. I feel so relieved! I just needed a couple of days of increased clozapine.

[Riseupfromtheruins]

You say that a safe place helps you.. to stay safe... A safe place can also be a place where you can tell someone the truth of what is going on inside you and the other person is totally understanding and accepting... of whatever you're going through... Sometimes, when we tell the truth to someone and feel understood, it decreases the urge to hurt ourselves...

[fern46]

Fantastic news Franz. I'm so glad to hear the med adjustment did the trick.