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Poohbah
Member Since Dec 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,280
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Jun 27, 2019 at 06:56 AM
#21
Imagine us all holding hands, giving each other strength. I find that when others, even those closest to me, aren’t there for me, that you and the others here are. So hold tight, we’re always here for you. Enormous hug.
__________________ Bipolar 2 with anxious distress mixed states & rapid cycling under severe stress tegretol 200 mg wellbutrin 75 mg, cut in half or higher dose as needed Regular aerobic exercise SKILLSET/KNOWLEDGE BASE: Family Medical Advocate Masters in Library Science Multiple Subject Teaching Credential-15 yrs in public schools |
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 AspiringAuthor, fern46, MickeyCheeky, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Wise Elder
Member Since Nov 2009
Location: NW US
Posts: 9,383
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Jun 27, 2019 at 05:13 PM
#22
I am sorry beyond words for what happened to you, Christina...
__________________ *********  Mr. Robot Makes me sick to the heart, Oh I feel so tired. And the way the rain comes down hard, that's how I feel inside. --The Cure
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: Milky Way
Posts: 4,746
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Jun 27, 2019 at 07:52 PM
#23
What an unbelievably traumatic thing to go through. I’m so sorry to hear you have/and still are suffered this way. PTSD can be all consuming. I sincerely hope this anniversary doesn’t trigger things too bad and that you can find some kind of peace again soon.
__________________ Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
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Grand Member
Member Since Sep 2018
Location: U.S.A
Posts: 796
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Jun 27, 2019 at 09:07 PM
#24
I am so sorry ~Christina That was an amazing thing for you to do; and I am so sorry that happened. __________________ Generalized Anxiety Disorder Depression Symptoms of PTSD Trintellix 10mg once daily Buspar 10mg three times daily |
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Elder
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,433
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Jun 28, 2019 at 12:40 PM
#25
We are always here for you Christina, just like you have been for us numerous times. I know what you are going through is impossibly hard but you are nothing if not a fighter and you will get through this. We love you! Keep working in therapy.
__________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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Jun 28, 2019 at 10:58 PM
#26
Thank you all for the continued support it’s humbling to receive it, truly.
She took over my daughters room while with us. Today I had to go in there as my husband had stored a few tote containers there. She had a cat. The smell just hit me like a brick to the face. Huge panic attack in an instant, it lasted over an hour, one of the longest panic attacks of my life. It’s in times like these, I feel white hot rage about her, and how I wish I had never met her. I see my T Richard on Wednesday and I know that it will help some. Ptsd is just such a gut wrenching monster that a “date, a smell or a item” can be devastating to a persons mind. So please everyone ..if you suffer from ptsd know I understand fully the torture and I’m always around if you need an ear or shoulder. __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,543
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Jun 29, 2019 at 04:05 PM
#27
I’m sorry you had that experience in your daughter’s room. Glad you are seeing your T soon. Thinking of you.
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Neurodivergent
Member Since Mar 2012
Location: Western US
Posts: 4,831
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Jul 03, 2019 at 12:23 AM
#28
Oh my goodness. I had no idea that this had happened. I know you've been cryptically referring to a traumatic event over the past couple of years but I didn't know what it actually was. I can't even imagine what you must have gone through. I'm so sorry you've been suffering from PTSD, I have a son who's an Iraq War veteran and he has it, and he suffers the tortures of the damned. You are a brave, strong lady...many ((((HUGS)))) to you.
__________________ DX: Bipolar 1 Anxiety Tardive dyskinesia Mild cognitive impairment RX: Celexa 20 mg Gabapentin 1200 mg Geodon 40 mg AM, 60 mg PM Klonopin 0.5 mg PRN Lamictal 500 mg Levothyroxine 125 mcg (rx'd for depression) Trazodone 150 mg Zyprexa 7.5 mg Please come visit me @ http://bpnurse.com |
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Legendary
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
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Jul 03, 2019 at 09:59 PM
#29
Still sending good thoughts!
Love and prayers, too!  
__________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths.
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MickeyCheeky, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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12 12.7k hugs
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Jul 04, 2019 at 03:02 AM
#30
Thank you WC for the continued support, it is so very comforting.
So I saw my T yesterday. I immediately just started crying my eyes out. It helped just being in his office , it smells like a old dusty bookstore. It’s a smell I love. They need to bottle it. He’s openly angry about the entire situation and it breaks his heart that I will always have to deal with it in some degree the rest of my life whether it be a date , a sound or smell. But after the session was over and I was heading back home it was building back up. But I did get a hour where I was able to take a deep breath. Something that ptsd robs from you. __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since May 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 1,523
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Jul 04, 2019 at 04:19 AM
#31
Christina, I didn't know you had endured this.
 Two years is not that long given what happened. The anger, panic and sensations are all part of the process of getting over what happened. I am sorry that your kindness has caused so much pain.
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MickeyCheeky, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
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Jul 04, 2019 at 06:08 AM
#32
Sending many good vibes to you, ~Christina! You're in my thoughts and prayers!
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| Wild Coyote
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Wise Elder
Member Since Nov 2009
Location: NW US
Posts: 9,383
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Jul 04, 2019 at 10:35 AM
#33
Christina You're in my thoughts. I hope it eases for you. I'm glad you got a respite in your T's office. Are you being able to take good care of yourself? I know you're good with that, but also know it's harder when things are sideways.
__________________ ********* Mr. Robot Makes me sick to the heart, Oh I feel so tired. And the way the rain comes down hard, that's how I feel inside. --The Cure
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MickeyCheeky, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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Jul 04, 2019 at 10:35 PM
#34
Hey IZ , thanks.
I guess I’m getting by I mean I’m always cooking , cleaning or any number of chores and hygiene daily. But it’s always there... I’m always one trigger away from hiding in bed for an hour or more. Looking back at last years anniversary this one is running basically the same. I was hoping this year I would be able to handle it better,quicker , easier. Maybe next year will be easier? I have to believe it will be or else I think I’d just give up. __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Wild Coyote
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: usa
Posts: 11,197
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Jul 04, 2019 at 10:58 PM
#35
My trauma got easier with time but still
Haunts me as you know. I hope peace for you <3 __________________ Bipolar 1 w/psychotic features or schizoaffective bipolar type PTSD generalized anxiety OCD celexa, prazosin, Lybalvi and prn zyprexa and klonopin |
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Member
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 343
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Jul 05, 2019 at 03:12 PM
#36
Thanks for being so kind to those in need including the people from PC. I'm sorry that the experience has left you heartbroken, but you made a comforting space for someone who needed it a lot. Thank you for that!
Take your time and seek out help! __________________ Bipolar I Meds: Lamotrigine as mood stabiliser Agomelatine and Sertralin as antidepressant Zopiclonum for sleeping when needed Lectopam to calm down when mixed |
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Elder Harridan x-hankster
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 39,866
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Jul 05, 2019 at 04:18 PM
#37
It's funny (not ha-ha), it seems like longer than two years ago. But then it wasnt on my doorstep.
Im also sorry if i wasnt as attentive to you as i could or should have been these past two years. We take good people too much for granted. |
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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12 12.7k hugs
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Jul 05, 2019 at 07:52 PM
#38
Unaluna... everyone and you included has been very supportive of my situation
__________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Account Suspended
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: United States
Posts: 154
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Jul 05, 2019 at 07:55 PM
#39
Take care of yourself ... people like you.
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| Wild Coyote
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2017
Location: Home
Posts: 1,642
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Jul 06, 2019 at 01:48 PM
#40
~Christina I am so sorry you experienced such a traumatic event. You showed amazing courage and kindness to take someone into your home like that.
I hope you receive all the support you need to get through this and sending you hugs! |
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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