[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Long day today. Great difficulty with walking.


I continue to stumble upon more and more information about what H has been up to. It's good to have proof. I don't feel so "crazy." He'd rather I were feeling "crazy." So, even though I am done searching for info that I already have, I keep "accidentally" stumbling upon more information. Hopefully, it is for good reason!


Am losing time and don't realize it until a day or two later; i cannot write more tonight. I am losing it.


I hope everyone has a good night!

Oh hun , I’m so sorry that you just keep finding more. When will the madness end???! Ugh !

I’m always here for you !!

Love you bunches

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Hey there, wildflower! I hope you get the job if it is truly in your best interest!!! :love)


~Christina! What to do? How to help? I am so sorry for all you are encountering!

Please do tell me if I can somehow help!!1

Your always helping me with support and love I’m ever so grateful for it

[LadyShadow]

I've been in really good spirits.

Have a new therapist who is wonderful.

The only big issue I have been dealing with is my anger and bitterness. I hope I can learn to get a hold of it soon.

[Wild Coyote]

Innerzone, I hope everything went well and you will sleep peacefully tonight!

BirdDancer, You have done so well while facing a lot. Maybe it's time to take some time Out?

Yellow_fleurs, A big hug for you!

[yellow_fleurs]

Christina, I am so sorry!! Ugh chronic pain is a b****, and it's so true if you don't experience it you just cannot imagine. I cannot complain at the moment, but having had it in the past know it is no joke. It left me very depressed and feeling hopeless. I hope this new medication helps and is approved quickly.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

I've been in really good spirits.

Have a new therapist who is wonderful.

The only big issue I have been dealing with is my anger and bitterness. I hope I can learn to get a hold of it soon.

Love having you around, sharing with us!
I miss you when you are away.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

I’d keep pushing to find out what roll your hormones are in playing and what can be done to most likely get your hormones on a steady level. So you don’t get out of sorts during your monthly cycle.

Thank you! You are right, I should probably pursue this more. I got scared I would make myself worse with birth control as happened before, but it might be worth trying something again.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

I got to work at 4:42am because I just couldn’t sleep last night. I tried going back to sleep, but I woke up at 3:30am and have been awake ever since! So, I figured I’d go to work early and leave early. (Might as well, right?) Then I will hopefully be tired enough to take a nap.

I’m not particularly tired, btw. I’m just “blah” from waking up so early. lol. I went to bed at 9pm. Maybe that’s why...? But I normally sleep like 10 hrs, not 6.5.

I’m just chillin at my desk at work being bored while I wait for something to finish running on my computer. I can’t take my Ritalin just yet, though, because I took my linzess at around 4:15am and have to wait 2 hrs. It’s now almost 6am. 15 more mins...

Anyway, I hope everyone has a good day today.

I hope you sleep well tonight!
I am tired tonight.

[Daonnachd]

I'm just happy to check in and wish the best to everyone.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

I'm just happy to check in and wish the best to everyone.

I am happy you offer you a hug!

(((((( Daonnachd ))))))

It's always a treat to have you posting!!!

Hi everyone! I haven't been on in awhile. Needed a break.

Wild Coyote --omg! I don't even know where to begin! It would be so scary to find out the person you've known so long is not who you thought they were. I'm so very sorry! Big hugs!

Christina-- I hope things calm down for you! Big hugs!

I'm down to 3 mgs of diazepam! Yay! It hasn't been THAT hard. I do get waves of anxiety but they pass. I'll be glad to be totally off benzos and I'll never, ever take them again!

My son at the beginning of the month stole from me to buy weed. That was stressful. Luckily he didn't get all psychotic. I'm still struggling with bathing. Since I had that panic attack in the bath tub I'm just really anxious about bathing. I can't shower due to my back. I have a shower chair but I'm too weak to go up and down with it and it kills my back going up and down.

I got ANOTHER new therapist. This one is fresh out of college. She's really young. We're going to do emdr on the bathing. I was in the middle of doing that with my last therapist. But she up and moved to California. This one is intimidated by me I feel. She's like, I looked through your file and wow, you've survived sooo much trauma, where to begin? I'm like I got to get this bathing thing under control so I can do pt again. I don't want to do it now dirty etc. I have a friend I talk to when I bathe. But she's not always around.

Not bathing enough causes me to isolate which isn't good. I did almost drown when I was 9. But I think it's something else. Idk, wish I didn't have this problem. It sucks.

So anyway, that's what is going on with me. Just life with ptsd and bipolar lol...

Originally Posted by spikes

I saw my new pdoc today. She's not going to be helpful I can tell. There's no such thing as help I guess. These suicidal thoughts are consuming me and no one except me can do anything about it apparently. I don't even know what to do other than give in to them.

I'm so sorry! Unfortunately, I know what it's like to have worthless pdocs or psych nurses. Please don't give up! You are loved and cared about! Please try to find some hope in anything. Or maybe have a good cry. You can always pm me. Please don't give up!

How do you give hugs from a phone? Does anyone know?

Originally Posted by rose1985

How do you give hugs from a phone? Does anyone know?

Nvmd. I figured it out.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by rose1985

How do you give hugs from a phone? Does anyone know?

I use Tapatalk so it doesn’t offer the hug option and I can’t stand to use web browser on my phone. So I “ thank “ people all the time.

Thanks for your support ! Good for you decreasing your benzo. I hope through therapy you can build back up useful coping skills that will improve your situation.

[~Christina]

IZ .... how did surgery go ?????

[komodo1971]

So, I had my "end evaluation"for disability with my current employer today. It is clear they want to get rid of me and push me into disability. And I don't want that, I am convinced I can work. But now I have to apply for it anyway. I will make the physician understand that being bipolar doesn't mean that I am not able to work and that anything they give me, has to be in support of getting a new job. I am not a happy camper

[Miss Laura]

Feeling good... away for a few days with my family to a lodge with a hot tub. 1 of 2 holidays this year like this. It's about 2 and a half hour drive from where I stay. It's meant to be raining the whole time but who cares lol!

Originally Posted by komodo1971

So, I had my "end evaluation"for disability with my current employer today. It is clear they want to get rid of me and push me into disability. And I don't want that, I am convinced I can work. But now I have to apply for it anyway. I will make the physician understand that being bipolar doesn't mean that I am not able to work and that anything they give me, has to be in support of getting a new job. I am not a happy camper

Sorry to hear that, komodo. Pushing someone into disability when they don't want to do it or when they feel they don't need to do it is a terrible thing to do.

I hope you're able to fix things and be able to continue working.

[Wild Coyote]

Hi Rose!
Thanks for your kind words.
Welcome back!