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yellow_fleurs
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Default Jul 20, 2019 at 10:39 AM
  #1
Sometimes I struggle with motivation, especially when depressed or dealing with a situation I have tried to fix for a long time such as my health and I feel like nothing I do will help it. This sometimes leads to a little learned helplessness, too. I wonder how people are dealing with motivation in tough times? Does anyone have any recommendations for ways to address this, such as a book that helped or something? Of course I just have to keep going, but sometimes I can use a little push in the right direction. If you would like to share, I appreciate it!
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Smile Jul 20, 2019 at 06:26 PM
  #2

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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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Default Jul 20, 2019 at 11:23 PM
  #3
I’m not having any luck today trying to compose advice for you today. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll make more sense.

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Default Jul 21, 2019 at 12:33 AM
  #4
I wish I had something good and worth while to say

but I don't... sorry. just know I struggle with motivation too so you're not on your own
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Default Jul 21, 2019 at 12:35 AM
  #5
I can't count the days where i've just sat here doing nothing.

these days it's like every day
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Default Jul 21, 2019 at 11:28 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by yellow_fleurs View Post
Sometimes I struggle with motivation, especially when depressed or dealing with a situation I have tried to fix for a long time such as my health and I feel like nothing I do will help it. This sometimes leads to a little learned helplessness, too. I wonder how people are dealing with motivation in tough times? Does anyone have any recommendations for ways to address this, such as a book that helped or something? Of course I just have to keep going, but sometimes I can use a little push in the right direction. If you would like to share, I appreciate it!
I struggle just about every day with motivation. Getting out of bed is a huge chore some days during depressive episodes. I try and do a grateful list in my head every morning and sometimes it helps me at least make the bed, eat, wash up and even clean around the house which takes huge motivation. Also, keeping in contact with my wife when she is at work helps. I also have obligations to take my son and daughter to work which takes a large amount of motivation for me. Sometimes I dwell on things and make myself anxious just thinking about having to do these things. It all passes though. I eventually realize that I made a mountain out of a molehill. But, yeah, I can relate. Motivation is hard to muster up. I also like to listen to music, podcasts and audio books to get me out of my funk. Helps this helps a bit. All the best!

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Default Jul 22, 2019 at 03:00 AM
  #7
Make yourself one attainable goal a day. It’s going to start off small and that’s good ! As the days move on and you are seeing yourself meet each one you will naturally make the goals larger and then things start to be a routine with out it feeling forced.

I hope I’m making some kind of sense.

I’m still stuck in my head and it’s loud lol

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Default Jul 22, 2019 at 06:53 AM
  #8
I really enjoy learning new things. I just browse Reddit and find random subreddits (and there are literally thousands of them) to read. One of my favorite subreddits is r/DIY (do it yourself) for people who do their own custom, unique projects based on cool ideas they've come up with. It gives me cool ideas of things I can do.

I've recently been interested in fixing faulty/broken electronics. I did study a lot of electrical engineering stuff in college, though. Like 7 courses worth. So I'm pretty knowledgeable about how electronics work, including soldering, circuit components, using appropriate voltages/currents, graphics, etc.. Raspberry pi's and Arduinos are pretty fun to fiddle with, too. I look up inspirational projects and stuff.

Electronics can be challenging, though, if you don't know your theories too well. But there are always video and picture tutorials out there that show you how to do things. Not sure if that's your cup of tea, but I've found that electronics can be useful, so it's fun to make them and use them.
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Default Jul 22, 2019 at 10:41 AM
  #9
Hi yellow_fleurs,

I also have trouble with motivation , both due to depression and, often, due to medication side-effects.
I don't know of any quick fixes. I like what ~Christina wrote about setting attainable goals and moving forward from there.
I also appreciate all that Bluebicycle has shared. It helps so much to take part in some activities we find interesting!

There used to be a thread in the depression forum where members share their daily goals and cheer one another on. The thread may be available now, I am not sure.

I need more motivation, too. I am thinking there must be some helpful videos on youtube?
Sometimes, it helps to just get moving! There are theories about movement and mood. In this regard, there are also youtube videos on stretches, exercises, etc. Once we get past the initial "inertia," sometimes we can continue on with more movement for day.

This is a great thread. Many of us could benefit from more motivation, for sure!

I am going to think on this some more.

Much Love ~

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Default Jul 22, 2019 at 07:26 PM
  #10
I recall a few years when "motivation" was one of my biggest challenges. I'm talking no motivation to do anything beyond tap tap on my laptop intermittently throughout the day, yearning for some social contact.

I think one of my very first good suggestions from a therapist about motivation was creating a "I want to do" list. The key to such a list when struggling a lot with motivation, is to NOT list things that are way beyond your current capability. My list included the simplest things, which were still major accomplishments, to me. Then I added a few "BONUS!!!!" things I could do. Here's an example:

1. Get up and brush teeth
2. Make bed, even if I make the bed and immediately lie back down on it. But on the made bed, not in the unmade bed.
3. Unload the bottom part of the dishwasher

Bonus things:

1. Unload the top part of the dishwasher, and if I can, put at least some dirty dishes in it.
2. Fry a kielbasa and put mustard, bread, and a tomato on the table.
3. Walk to the end of the block and back.

Now, the above seem pretty pathetic, but when you're really really struggling, the above are major accomplishments. The point is to see them as major accomplishments and feel proud and rewarded when you get some (not even all) of them done. One thing I did was to send my husband the top list in the morning, and as I got items done, I let him know by email. He'd legitimately give me kudos, because he knew my situation. That "Atta Girl!" was a pleasant reward. It made me want to do more and more, including more than even the bonus list items.

The above is a first step. Motivation increase is often a baby steps process.

Last edited by Anonymous46341; Jul 22, 2019 at 08:44 PM..
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Default Jul 22, 2019 at 07:43 PM
  #11
I live to commit to small increments. I will wash dishes for 15 mins. I can keep going if I want to, but even if I quit after 15 mins, I still did what I said I was going to do.

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It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!
---"Address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society". Abraham Lincoln Online. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. September 30, 1859.
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Default Jul 24, 2019 at 06:23 PM
  #12
Thank you everyone!
Christina, attainable goals sound like a good idea, thanks!
Bluebicycle I like the idea of learning new things. I am impressed with your hobby! I don't really have electronics skills but I love learning and puzzles so might enjoy it. I bought some clay to try to learn to make pottery, just need to get motivated haha.
Thanks WildCoyote. I have actually been looking for motivational videos, if I find any good ones I can share. I am working on the movement thing, it really does make a difference!
BirdDancer thank you for the thoughtful and practical advice. I have not tried a to-do list in awhile, so maybe I'll try it out!
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Default Jul 24, 2019 at 06:24 PM
  #13
Thanks Merlin. Sometimes I can find something seems daunting and will never start it, but small increments is a good way to get going.
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