advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 22, 2019 at 01:22 PM
  #21
I was so nervous. It was easy we went over my last intake, Current symptoms, Dx. (schizoaffective), and safety plan. In 3 weeks I meet my therapist. I have their number, my psychiatrists number and the suicide hotline number. I was more put together then at night. I said what was going on but not the feelings or fear associated with it. She reminded me the hospital is always an option. I explained my fear (not that they won't let me out) just that my fear of the hospital keeps me safe.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TunedOut, unaluna

advertisement
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 22, 2019 at 10:45 PM
  #22
H was saying he hates that I "get better" the closer my appointments, today I'm the most stable I've been in a while. He's okay with me having weekly appointments right now. He's concerned. He wants me on more medication. He doesn't know I was so scared that I was crying yesterday. I have an appointment the 5th also. This all seems so far away. I know they really can't help right now. I'm wearing headphones blaring music to keep the voices out. It's so ****en tiring your mind running all the time.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
fern46, TunedOut
Anonymous35014
Guest
Anonymous35014 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 08:18 AM
  #23
How are you feeling today?
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 09:16 AM
  #24
Quote:
How are you feeling today?
I'm mad I have to sit in a hallway waiting for classes to get out.

So I’ve been talking to my husband. I asked him to put up the tools. He was horrified. I tried explaining but it goes against my cleanliness issue. Now he doesn’t even want me in the kitchen because of sharp objects. He said I’m not getting better. I argued with examples and really pissed him off. I guess I haven’t been telling him the ****ed up things. He reminded me we’re not enemies. He firmly believes I need more medication, that this won’t just pass.

I have the feeling he would have contacted my treatment team if we were in WV. He was urged to call and I had access to walk in appointments m-f with pdoc. I know they’d be pissed. The whole quality of life speech pdoc gave me is echoing in my head. We were told we don’t get to make decisions about each others health. They fired us from that position because we’d let things go to far before intervention.

I need a team I trust, that trusts me. No one trusts me. I’m hopeful that new T will do that. I wish intake T was my T. I’m going to ask pdoc if I can see her monthly even when I’m well. If not I may ask my new T if any of their drs. can do that. I just feel wrong asking for appointments I don’t need when pdocs are hard to find. I’m going to ask my husband first if it’s okay with him. I have to do this before I accept this is just how my life is and get use to it. I told him his meds aren’t working either. He wanted me to give examples but I don’t want him to feel bad or get defensive. He already has enough stress with school starting.

The only break through symptoms right now is my leg shaking. H says it’s anxiety. Right now I’m in the mood I’d take any drug they’d throw at me I just want my head quiet, I’m tired. I’m counting down 17 days.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TunedOut
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 09:57 AM
  #25
Maybe they need a break from me, I need a break from me. I'm so ****en so indecisive.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TunedOut
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 01:50 PM
  #26
So I called pdoc and She has no openings on Monday. I was told to call back Monday morning.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 05:44 PM
  #27
I asked my husband if he was okay with me seeing pdoc more he said it's okay . So now I have to ask pdoc when I see her.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
yellow_fleurs
Grand Poohbah
yellow_fleurs has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: US
Posts: 1,512
5 yr Member
1,265 hugs
given
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 06:55 PM
  #28
I see you are trying to take steps to get more care and I think that's great. I hope your pdoc can see you more often. I also think it's good you are taking precautions to keep yourself safe. Do your T's not trust you to stay safe, is that what you mean?
yellow_fleurs is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Victoria'smom
Legendary
 
Victoria'smom's Avatar
Victoria'smom has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Location: Earth
Posts: 14,880 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
5,415 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Aug 23, 2019 at 07:37 PM
  #29
Do your T's not trust you to stay safe, is that what you mean? My H doesn't. I currently don't have a T (getting one on the 11th) and pdoc has no idea whats been going on. I fear if I'm honest with pdoc she wont trust me either BUT I was honest with intake T and she trusted me enough to let me go home. So my fear that they'll hospitalize me is unfounded. I keep trying to remind myself that if I was that bad intake would have kept me. That it's just my anxiety/paranoia.

__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+


Comfortable broken and happy

"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
My blog
Victoria'smom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TunedOut
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:24 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.