Interesting read on psych meds.

The Challenge of Going Off Psychiatric Drugs | The New Yorker

This was a fantastic read. Thanks so much for sharing it. It highlights an issue I feel like I experienced in my own life as well as one I see happening here with a number of people.

First of all, I'd like to say I believe medications are important and have their place. I was first placed on meds while in the throws of a severe psychotic manic episode. I was a danger to myself and others and the medications I was given pulled me out of that state. I needed them.

That said, I feel like there is an epidemic of a waterfall type effect happening with those of us who take medications for mental illness. I'll use myself as an example. I was first placed on Depakote and Risperdal. My heart was racing at 150 beats per minute and my blood pressure was high. My doctor took me off Depakote and raised my Risperdal. The racing heart went away, but the blood pressure problem persisted, so I was given Inderal. I've never had high blood pressure, so I was given a second med to combat an effect caused by another med. Waterfall.

I was experiencing worry about relapse while I was in IOP. It was mild anxiety. Geodon was added to my medication mix to help with the worry. Waterfall 2. I became zombie like during the day and was napping all the time. My anxiety worsened and I became obsessed with passing time and how I would fill each moment. This was new for me and very strange. Same for the napping. I never needed naps before.

I discussed my symptoms with my doctor. He thought maybe I was slightly depressed and I had anxiety on top of what they were guessing was bipolar disorder. He wanted to prescribe an anti anxiety medication. That would have been waterfall 3. I got upset and pleaded with him to believe me that none of this was normal for me and that I am very sensitive to medication. I asked him to please review my meds and determine if any of these symptoms were caused by my meds. He thought about it and said the Geodon in the morning could be causing the sleepiness even though I was on a low dose. He also felt the Risperdal could be to blame for the anxiety. I was stable otherwise, so he changed gears and came up with a plan to bring me off Risperdal and move my Geodon to night. We started with tapering Risperdal and decided I could live with the sleepiness for a while. My anxiety lessened and went away completely once I was off of it. We then moved my Geodon dose to night and I haven't needed a nap since. My blood pressure has also normalized.

I had to live with some unfortuante symptoms while I was tapering off meds and working with my doctor to get it right, but it was 100 percent worth it. I know some meds are necessary, but I feel like many of us have these kinds of waterfall effects going on. We have one med causing new mental health symptoms or physical symptoms that are just being treated with additional meds. The overall effect is toxic in my humble opinion. I also agree with the article that many no longer even know what baseline feels like anymore. I know I'm ranting, but I wish doctors would read this article and spend more time with patients. They are so quick to medicate every symptom and it is killing us slowly. There has to be a better way.

That was a LoooooNG scary article! Now I feel even more stuck on meds than I did before.

@fern46- I also found it interesting the comparison she made when they upped her meds as a way of communicating her degree of pain to the world. I sadly have been there with that form of thinking. I found commonality with how she ruminated about the symptoms and how every mood shift was something marked. I had a couple of therapists, one in a group setting and the other, one on one, in the past month mention even if you are misdiagnosed, you can psychologically develop the symptoms of that disorder. At times, I let my diagnoses define me and at times consume me, but I never questioned if it has manipulated me. Are my symptoms real?

I found that interesting as well. It is such a struggle because we all need to be honest about what we feel, but sometimes we just need to work through it. Sometimes we need our doctors to realize more meds will just make a bad situation worse. I do not envy psychiatrists. It is really hard to know the right steps to take.

I think your therapists make an amazing point. I know exactly what you mean. I do not fit the typical presentation of bipolar disorder. At first, I molded my approach to living with it based on what I was told is the right approach for my disorder. Over time I realized I wasn't a match for a lot of the experience. Luckily my doctors recognize I am atypical and they wisely suggested that we treat real symptoms and not labels. I'm am trying not to fit into any mold anymore. I am trying to just allow things to evolve naturally without holding myself to the preconceived notions of bipolar disorder. I take what resonates and what I truly identify with and I leave the rest. I do not want to get into a self fulfilling prophecy if I can instead carve my own path. There's definitely something amiss with my brain and I accept that, but I am going to do all I can to be as healthy as I can and then see what happens.

ETA: I think it is unfortunate that there is such a stigma around questioning our diagnosis. Questioning a diagnosis of bipolar disorder is literally a symptom of bipolar disorder. What are we to do?

I found it a depressing read with all the SH and sui ideation.
I couldn’t finish reading it.
Maybe add a trigger icon/warning?

Did not think to do that! Sorry Poolyl.

******trigger warning**** I can’t figure out where to edit this. For anyone reading the messages before the article, this article could possibly trigger you do please read with caution.

thanks for the link. sounds really interesting. will read it tonight!

I hate to quit too soon in it , triggers and alarms in my head.

But I’m sure it’s a good read for some people