Bipolar Check-In #38

~Christina · Oct 20, 2019 at 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I think my body is in shock or something from the bowel prep. I've been done drinking it for a few hours but I'm freezing cold and shaking. I even took a hot shower to see if it would help but it only did for a few minutes. I'm fine, it's just weird.

3 more hours until I'm not allowed anything by mouth.

The last time I had to do it I also was freezing cold

I was heating up blankets in the dryer , I know you don’t have that option

It’s not like you can go warm up in the car with needing quick access to the bathroom.

I’m so sorry your going through all this.

BeyondtheRainbow · Oct 20, 2019 at 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Christina

The last time I had to do it I also was freezing cold

I was heating up blankets in the dryer , I know you don’t have that option

It’s not like you can go warm up in the car with needing quick access to the bathroom.

I’m so sorry your going through all this.

A dryer sounds amazing. I've finally gotten past sh aking at least. I ran the heater until it was 78 in here and am under layers of blankets and keep drinking hot tea/hot broth. I'm looking forward to the warmed hospital blankets in the morning.

I'm mostly just looking forward to being done. I'm so glad the prep is over, now just to get through the procedures. I want to be in my own bed and I can do that as soon as I wake up enough to leave. Last time I had general anesthesia in this day surgery area I woke up really fast and wide awake so I'm hoping they do the same thing tomorrow.

I love my MAOI but it is a pain sometimes.

Sunflower123 · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:01 PM

Checking in. I feel alone and that nobody at all cares, my life is never going to get better, I have an incurable illness and I’m trapped in a situation that makes me very unhappy. No hope or joy today. I am tempted by permanent solutions to temporary problems. I will sleep it off and try again tomorrow.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

Nammu · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Checking in. I feel alone and that nobody at all cares, my life is never going to get better, I have an incurable illness and I’m trapped in a situation that makes me very unhappy. No hope or joy today. I am tempted by permanent solutions to temporary problems. I will sleep it off and try again tomorrow.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

fern46 · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Checking in. I feel alone and that nobody at all cares, my life is never going to get better, I have an incurable illness and I’m trapped in a situation that makes me very unhappy. No hope or joy today. I am tempted by permanent solutions to temporary problems. I will sleep it off and try again tomorrow.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

I care.

Nammu · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:11 PM

I'm feeling so much better tonight. Yesterday I had a bowl of bean soup and rolls, today I had scrambled eggs with ham and cheese and applesauce and so far it's been all good. Still broken sleep but hey, that's better than no sleep and I was able to keep my meds down. I gotta drink another bottle of water tonight though. I give blood tomorrow and they keep sending me messages about how much they need my O blood. Then tomorrow I've gotta drink at least two bottles before I go in. .....still that nothing on what rainbow had to drink tonight!

Blue_Bird · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:47 PM

Can't sleep again

BeyondtheRainbow · Oct 20, 2019 at 09:52 PM

I took part of my clozapine and part of my gabapentin and the rest of my meds. I hope this is enough to let me sleep but not so soundly something bad happens.

I tried to clear this with my pdoc but it got lost in the forest of the GI who was demanding my pdoc re-schedule the procedure and do things not in my pdoc's job description. So I guessed. Chances are pretty good I won't sleep much. I can take more meds if I need them but I'd rather be overly tired tomorrow from being up late than be overly tired from being up late due to an accident in my sleep.

For now i"m just staying awake to keep drinking until midnight when I have to stop. I'm surprised how little it bothered me to not eat today; I kept plenty full with fluids. I brought jello but it just was gross so that was a waste of $1. beef broth, however, has tasted amazing.

In 12 hours I should be waking up or awake from anesthesia. Yay.

Wild Coyote · Oct 20, 2019 at 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Checking in. I feel alone and that nobody at all cares, my life is never going to get better, I have an incurable illness and I’m trapped in a situation that makes me very unhappy. No hope or joy today. I am tempted by permanent solutions to temporary problems. I will sleep it off and try again tomorrow.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

hi Jennifer!

I was thinking of you today. I should have sent you a message.

Did something happen? Did someone/something trigger you?
The last i knew, rather recently, you were up and looking forward to seeing M.

Please do let me know if I can help?
Keep reaching out here, Jennifer.
We are here for you. I also think you know how to text a helpline?

I am very concerned. I have known you for a few years now and I have never seen you admit to feeling so down.

Please stay safe!

Wild Coyote · Oct 20, 2019 at 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I took part of my clozapine and part of my gabapentin and the rest of my meds. I hope this is enough to let me sleep but not so soundly something bad happens.

I tried to clear this with my pdoc but it got lost in the forest of the GI who was demanding my pdoc re-schedule the procedure and do things not in my pdoc's job description. So I guessed. Chances are pretty good I won't sleep much. I can take more meds if I need them but I'd rather be overly tired tomorrow from being up late than be overly tired from being up late due to an accident in my sleep.

For now i"m just staying awake to keep drinking until midnight when I have to stop. I'm surprised how little it bothered me to not eat today; I kept plenty full with fluids. I brought jello but it just was gross so that was a waste of $1. beef broth, however, has tasted amazing.

In 12 hours I should be waking up or awake from anesthesia. Yay.

Very impressive! you are amazing! i don't know if i could have gotten this far, all things considered.

i hope you can sleep. i also pray the procedure will occur with ease! it will be over before you know it!

BeyondtheRainbow · Oct 20, 2019 at 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

i hope you can sleep. i also pray the procedure will occur with ease! it will be over before you know it!

Thank you. I"m terrified that I'll get there and be sent home for an incomplete prep or something. I have no real basis for this fear, just general anxiety about having to repeat the gallon of yuck.

Pookyl · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:41 AM

I’ve had a good day so far. It’s funny how much better I feel and how much more upbeat I am on 400mgs Seroquel XR than on 300mgs.
I managed to push through the anxiety and go out for a couple of hours. Had lunch and got my nails done as a reward. Must admit though that it was a relief to be back home.

~Christina · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Checking in. I feel alone and that nobody at all cares, my life is never going to get better, I have an incurable illness and I’m trapped in a situation that makes me very unhappy. No hope or joy today. I am tempted by permanent solutions to temporary problems. I will sleep it off and try again tomorrow.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

Oh no

Bipolar life can be such a struggle at times

Have you been getting out much ? I think you have posted in the past about isolating and it sends you downward into a spiral

Do you have anything planned to look forward too ? Any plans set to see your daughter soon ?

Please stay safe...

~Christina · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu

I'm feeling so much better tonight. Yesterday I had a bowl of bean soup and rolls, today I had scrambled eggs with ham and cheese and applesauce and so far it's been all good. Still broken sleep but hey, that's better than no sleep and I was able to keep my meds down. I gotta drink another bottle of water tonight though. I give blood tomorrow and they keep sending me messages about how much they need my O blood. Then tomorrow I've gotta drink at least two bottles before I go in. .....still that nothing on what rainbow had to drink tonight!

Yay !! Food and meds are staying where they belong!!!!!

Yes must hydrate hydrate hydrate !

~Christina · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Can't sleep again

I often just lay down and stare at the wall.. sometimes I doze off from boredom.

Does a shower before bed help you relax at all ?

Hope sleep finds you

~Christina · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I took part of my clozapine and part of my gabapentin and the rest of my meds. I hope this is enough to let me sleep but not so soundly something bad happens.

I tried to clear this with my pdoc but it got lost in the forest of the GI who was demanding my pdoc re-schedule the procedure and do things not in my pdoc's job description. So I guessed. Chances are pretty good I won't sleep much. I can take more meds if I need them but I'd rather be overly tired tomorrow from being up late than be overly tired from being up late due to an accident in my sleep.

For now i"m just staying awake to keep drinking until midnight when I have to stop. I'm surprised how little it bothered me to not eat today; I kept plenty full with fluids. I brought jello but it just was gross so that was a waste of $1. beef broth, however, has tasted amazing.

In 12 hours I should be waking up or awake from anesthesia. Yay.

Hopefully you get some sleep tonight

~Christina · Oct 21, 2019 at 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pookyl

I’ve had a good day so far. It’s funny how much better I feel and how much more upbeat I am on 400mgs Seroquel XR than on 300mgs.

I managed to push through the anxiety and go out for a couple of hours. Had lunch and got my nails done as a reward. Must admit though that it was a relief to be back home.

I’m so glad the meds are working well for you !!

I think rewards are a wonderful way to stay motivated

glad you got out

Oct 21, 2019 at 02:47 AM

Jennifer, we all care! I hope tomorrow is a nicer day.

BeyondtheRainbow · Oct 21, 2019 at 03:04 AM

Well, I thought I was doing so great because I didn't get hungry at all during my day without food. I don't think I realized exactly how much I drank. Now I'm 4 hours past the end of liquids and I am so hungry! And thirsty but much more hungry.

I've gotten to doze a few times but can't get to sleep. Every time I almost get there I have to pee, also because I was so good at drinking fluids all day.

3 more hours to try to rest.

I want a cheeseburger. And an apple. And a cookie.

falcon09 · Oct 21, 2019 at 03:09 AM

Slept for about 4 hours, don't know if I'm gonna get back to sleep.

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Bipolar Check-In #38

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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,741 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.3k hugs given	Oct 20, 2019 at 09:47 PM #827 Can't sleep again __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Anonymous46341 Guest Posts: n/a	Oct 21, 2019 at 02:47 AM #838 Jennifer, we all care! I hope tomorrow is a nicer day.
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falcon09 Grand Magnate Member Since Feb 2015 Location: United States Posts: 3,018 9 1,867 hugs given	Oct 21, 2019 at 03:09 AM #840 Slept for about 4 hours, don't know if I'm gonna get back to sleep. __________________
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