Bipolar check in #39

Really bad cold (Flu? No fever.) the past two days, not a good thing to layer on top of depression. Didn't get out of bed much yesterday. I got bored of not being able to do anything because I was almost too dizzy to walk -- I kept bumping into doors and knocking stuff over -- so I finally pulled all the wiring from the family room laptop, carefully took it downstairs to the bedroom, set it back up on my lap and, of course, fell right asleep. The whole day was a complete waste.

Luckily, Mary took it in stride and didn't blame me (much) for being so unhelpful and grumpy during the day.

Still a bit woozy this morning, but not coughing as much, or using a whole box of tissues and a full roll of toilet paper blowing my nose. I'm awake now, watched some of the latest local/national news and Stephen Colbert's monologue, forced down a bowl of Fruit Loops (craving sugar) and a half-cup of coffee. Oh, and I checked my email and dropped in here to complain.

Here's hoping everyone is feeling fine (better than me anyway) and will have a smooth and unexciting day.

I'm going back to bed, stopping maybe to "look in" on Mary who's taking a shower; that works better than Nyquil ya' know,

Sending healing vibes

@Wild Coyote You and your aunt are in my prayers.

I hope they can get him in.
bizi

Hi Lady!
I smile every time I see you dancing.
Thank you!

I am going to try to get a haricut today, too.

I hope your dad will have the courage to follow through!

Yes, people dealing with addictions can be very fickle when it comes to recovery. (I have driven my brother to the door of the rehab a few times, only to have him run. In my case, I had to keep trying, hoping that one day he'd be able to enter the door to the facility.)

It's incredibly encouraging, in my experience, when our loved ones start to look so much better!

Many Hugs and Lots of Love!

Hey, guys and gals. Sorry I am not commenting on anyone else's issues today. almost no sleep in past 72 hours. Totally, wide awake. Am pretty hypomanic and just kind of trying to keep it together until Dr. C. calls me back. Sorry. Will update when I know more.

Hugs. I am sorry your are experiencing this. I know it must feel very uncomfortable. My plan for Hypomania is a cup of decaf tea, a snuggly blanket and Bob Ross reruns on Netflix. Maybe you can create a vibe like that for a while and find rest at some point today. Hopefully your doc will call back soon!

I hope you feel better soon. So many people have these same symptoms now. Hopefully it will pass quickly. Take care!

This sounds very promising BirdDancer. I am hopeful it works out for the best and that your Dad receives the assistance he needs to be well.

Enjoy the haircut! A little self care is an excelleny way to start the weekend.

I am sorry you are going through this.

It sounds like you are handling this very wisely.
Maybe the pdoc will reply soon!?

Yes, keep us in the loop!
Please take good care!

Hi randal, It's no fun to be sick in bed, I am sorry you are feeling so poorly.
I hate dizziness, itis one of the worst symptoms in my humble opinion and experience.

I see you have a sense of humor when you are so ill.
I admire that!
Take good care and keep us posted!

Praying that your aunt can have the surgery and that all goes smoothly.

@randal: you're a scamp, with your lust for Mary! It means you are alive and well! Made me laugh!

I'm still feeling well. Last night i attended a planning meeting for our building's Christmas event. It was billed as a "Christmas COCKTAIL PARTY" so i was really excited as i've never really been to a genuine cocktail party as an adult, just parties in my own home where i was a kid. I imagined waiters circulating with silver trays of champagne and hors d'oeuvres and us dressed to the nines! My mom used to make exquisite hors d'oeuvres, tiny quiche, cheese pastries, pigs-in-a-blanket, etc. She had a "no fail" recipe for pastry. Good pastry is hard to make. She would put out a whole spread, including warm ones on a giant electric warming plate. I read in a novel about this family that would have nothing but hors d'oeuvres for dinner one night a month and i thought that was a great idea!

I was looking so forward to our Christmas cocktail party!

But alas, in the course of the meeting everything got changed to a dumb old "Christmas CELEBRATION" with dumb old crackers + cheese, veggies + dip and finger sandwiches and nothing will be replenished once it's gone -- it's all "too bad, so sad." What kind of attitude is THAT for an affluent building like ours?! SO DISAPPOINTING!!! I've been to that type of 'celebration' many times before! We all have. It's what's usually served at public gatherings at Christmas and at office Christmas parties!

Last year i and the other women in the building put on an entire Christmas DINNER! It was truly a FEAST (and i don't use that word lightly) such as i've never been to before and my dish was a hit, people had some and came back for seconds, all 6.5 liters of it went! I was overjoyed! Several people DEMANDED the recipe! And i'm just a novice cook! There was turkey and ham and shrimp rings galore! No sooner was something finished than it was replaced by another platter! There was enough for all! It made me so proud of our building! We are a really special condo building, the best kept secret in the city and i was thrilled that we put on such a spread as you would never get anywhere else!

But there is a new organizer this year and she doesn't want to do anything but decorate. She delegated everything else to people that didn't even volunteer, she just twisted their arms in front of everyone until they were so uncomfortable they finally gave in. And she's a Board member! Such a poor showing from her. And such a mediocre plan. Really disappointed.

Today i made my own solution. I bought frozen hors d'oeuvres and will get a champagne flute and a diet Sprite and have my own cocktail party with my dog! I'll wear sequins and be the lady and get her a bow and she can be the gent! I'll talk scintillating conversation to her and she can bark!

Aces!

Love to all!

I feel quite relieved and more energetic and happier now that I’ve decided to back off and simply live life.

I was up early taking brother to have lab work, taking animals to the vet, etc. I’m getting ready to go to a Gingerbread Craft Fair soon. I’m excited about that as they’ll have chili and baked goodies along with crafts. I’m going to take some goodies to M tomorrow. Excited about that as well. It’s a beautiful day here.

Getting more social slowly. I’ve been taking mom along everywhere (even to my doctor visits) as she’s been down lately and is getting disengaged. She’s been a good sport about it and seems to enjoy herself. She doesn’t know it yet but I’m taking her to the Drum Circle next week and then on to a movie. I hope she has a good time.

I hope everyone has a peaceful weekend.

Had the appointment at my college today, it was quick and easy. I gave them the paperwork and medical documentation from my therapist and psych supporting my decision to withdraw last spring. It just has to be reviewed now.

Finally got maintenance over here to replace my showerhead, can't wait to take a nice long shower. '

It's really cold here in NY today.

I've been having some breakthrough symptoms. Nothing too major though, it generally resolves itself, but I'll mention it to my doctor.

Not much going on during the weekend. Just cleaning. Next week I have appointments with my psychiatrist, therapist and I have to walk in to the clinic I go to to get new meds for GERD since I can't take zantac anymore.

Hope everyone is doing well

I think I'm in some sort of mixed state.

I woke up 3 hours early today, have had racing thoughts throughout the day, and am irritable.

At the same time I'm not feeling good about myself or things in general.

To make things more interesting, I'm still sick and work is really stressful.

But I'm hanging on. I know things will change at some point. Better? Worse? Who knows.

Feel better soon, Rand, my friend!

Jennifer, that sounds wonderful! I'm so happy that life is feeling better for you now.

Blue_Bird, stay warm! Glad you got some things fixed and settled.

Scooter, I hope this weekend is the reprieve you need from the stress. Perhaps with a bit of stress relief your mixed moods will ease.

@~Christina, how are you? I've been thinking of you today and hoping you have been able to enjoy the day a bit after taking so many blows yesterday. I know it was an awful lot to process.

I got more good news from my sister. Though Dad may not be going directly to an alcohol rehab (he was rejected for medical reasons), he has agreed to temporarily stay in an assisted living place. He was also connected with an AA member from his town, who will be there for him even before his return, and upon his return. He needs THAT kind of friend, not the other so-called types.

I told my sister that we have to clear some clutter in his house. Sis says she'll work on Dad's paperwork. We NEED my brother to clear his crap out of the dining room. I'll work a bit on cleaning things like the inside of his refrigerator, microwave, and things like that that a cleaning person wouldn't touch. I told my sister and brother that if my father continues to be serious about recovery, I will pay for a deep super cleaning of his house by professional house cleaners. I will also pay for a professional outfit to come and super clean all of his rugs. I told my sister that the house must look different when Dad eventually goes home. I want to go to a place like Marshall's and buy some inexpensive things that will help make a difference, like new place mats, new bathroom stuff, a new blanket for the sofa, and the like. I will even create a beautiful flower arrangement for his dining room table, and make some goodies for his eventual return home. I'd like my siblings to help pay for the Marshall's type stuff. I want my brother, who lives with my Dad, to make more of an effort not to clutter things. Ideally, I'd like my brother to clean up some of the junk that's in my dad's backyard. It's starting to look like Sanford & Son's junkyard.

The social worker said that my father has agreed not to drive for a while after he returns home. He won't renew his lease on his Mercedes. That still leaves him with the truck, but I told my sister we should ask to hold his keys for him. He has another car that's on stilts (or whatever). I think my brother should finally do something with it, or get rid of it, with Dad's permission.

My brother is a large part of the problem in terms of mess. My sister and I need to figure out how best to work with him. By the way, I don't intend to pay the cleaning people to clean my brother's room. If he wants that, he needs to chip in a little money on it. I doubt it!

I am being a bit aggressive about the cleanliness of my father's house. I have the cleanest house in my immediate family. Before my brother moved in with my father, and my father became ill, Dad's house wasn't that bad at all.

That’s wonderful that he agreed to assisted living on a temporary basis. You have some great ideas for his home. I hope everything works out.