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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 11:13 AM
  #1
Me: I was feeling revved up and not sleeping, but also feeling horribly depressed with suicidal thoughts. Pdoc suspected I was experiencing a mixed episode, but (being an asshole in denial) gave me an antidepressant that ultimately made me manic. After that, he gave me an unofficial bipolar Dx.
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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 11:20 AM
  #2
i think they listed me as bipolar right away for insurance purposes but no one was sure until they took me off meds and then I started becoming psychotic again months later. They still aren’t 100% sure it’s not sza though.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 11:52 AM
  #3
There were signs before the disaster took place. No sleeping, running around firing off crazy emails at 3 in the morning. Buying 6 guitars in 3 days on ebay without telling my partner, who wondered where all these beautiful instruments came from. Verbalizing weird reactions to movies, thinking they were really about me. Hyperreligiosity. On and on. Definitely, signs.

But then, one day, I suddenly freaked out, believing I had to get to my Alano Club up town by 3 o'clock in order to defuse a nuclear bomb. It's a ten-minute drive in no traffic. It was 257 pm on a Friday. I drove like a maniac in rush hour traffic, hitting another car and causing some injuries. I wound up in the ER. Explained the gravity of the whole nuclear bomb situation to the psychiatrist there and--voila!!! Bipolar 1 diagnosis.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 01:12 PM
  #4
I started seeing the psychiatrist that diagnosed me about 15 years ago. My GP told me to get a psychiatrist. Of course as many do, I went in only complaining about anxiety and depression. He gave me Lexapro. [I had taken a couple other antidepressants, and Buspar, very very briefly prior to that for the same reason.] This psychiatrist convinced me to attend his group therapy, that he led. I believe I attended it maybe four times, after starting the Lexapro. By that fourth time, he observed a switch to an irritable hypomania. If I recall correctly, I was talking loudly, rapidly, and aggressively, with some glee and likely grandiosity mixed in. I also said something offensive. I won't write exactly what I yelled, but it was something like "People who own X's are environmental demons and should rot in ever-lasting Hell!" Well, I kind of bet he owned an "X". A lot of people do. When sane, I don't think such people are really that bad, but when on the manic end, I'll readily say such things. At some point before, I also yelled at one of the other patients in the group. Whoops! I swear I'm not a horrible bullying woman, but when I become really irritable with hypomania/mania, this stuff flies from my mouth, like acidic vomit. I've said/yelled much worse. I'm a rather outspoken woman even stable. When impulsivity and disinhibition are involved, it's bad!

At the end of the above-mentioned session, that psychiatrist tapped me on the shoulder and asked me to stay after. I did. He announced that I have "manic depression" and that he needs to take me off of the antidepressant. If I recall correctly, he wanted to put me on Lamictal, which would likely not have been sufficiently helpful alone, anyway. But when he said that, I basically told him to take a hike. I left, with him shoving a brochure about bipolar disorder in my hand, and didn't come back for a year. That was when the you know what really hit the fan, and I was hospitalized for the first time.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 03:42 PM
  #5
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Originally Posted by bluebicycle View Post
Me: I was feeling revved up and not sleeping, but also feeling horribly depressed with suicidal thoughts. Pdoc suspected I was experiencing a mixed episode, but (being an asshole in denial) gave me an antidepressant that ultimately made me manic. After that, he gave me an unofficial bipolar Dx.
I'm sorry about that A hole pdoc. I've seen a few of those too. grrrrrrrrrrrr

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 04:26 PM
  #6
I was very depressed, so they gave me an antidepressant, and I went psychotic.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 04:33 PM
  #7
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Originally Posted by bpcyclist View Post
There were signs before the disaster took place. No sleeping, running around firing off crazy emails at 3 in the morning. Buying 6 guitars in 3 days on ebay without telling my partner, who wondered where all these beautiful instruments came from. Verbalizing weird reactions to movies, thinking they were really about me. Hyperreligiosity. On and on. Definitely, signs.

But then, one day, I suddenly freaked out, believing I had to get to my Alano Club up town by 3 o'clock in order to defuse a nuclear bomb. It's a ten-minute drive in no traffic. It was 257 pm on a Friday. I drove like a maniac in rush hour traffic, hitting another car and causing some injuries. I wound up in the ER. Explained the gravity of the whole nuclear bomb situation to the psychiatrist there and--voila!!! Bipolar 1 diagnosis.


ugg I hear you on the crazy emails.

I have destroyed many a friendship that way

I don't even want to talk about what was in some of them, they were... well, cruel
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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 04:44 PM
  #8
The antidepressant prescribed, which was not monitored, made me hypomanic. I sent some crazy emails. Nothing mean but the emails I received in ''exchange'' were mean. (not anyone here). The antidepressant wasn't the correct treatment especially with NO SUPPORT or even ''monitoring''...….

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 05:18 PM
  #9
My psychiatrist barely knows me – I only spent about 3 minutes per visit, 3 times a year. So, there isn’t much being seen there. My therapist noticed pretty early on. Rapid mood cycling with very risky behaviors to deep depressions. About a year of being with him he told me he felt that was the best diagnosis.
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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 05:50 PM
  #10
I guess I'm the odd one out, but I showed up for my first meeting with my pdoc nice and fully manic. She still went through the hour or so of question and answer diagnosis stuff, but it wasn't exactly rocket science to tag me and ship me out with some depakote.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 06:07 PM
  #11
My mom had me go see a psychiatrist (I was 18) she threatened to get it court ordered somehow if I wouldn't go see someone. I spent 6 months in psychosis and in and out of mania. I hid in my closet because I believed the government was coming after me. Wouldn't eat because I thought there were bugs and poison in my food, and was acting very strange, having auditory hallucinations, not sleeping for days in a row and various other manic symptoms.

She was at a loss for what to do with me and I finally agreed to go to the place I had gone when I was a younger teenager and depressed to see psychiatrist. She talked to me for awhile and then asked if my mom could come in and I said yes, and the doctor basically interviewed her about the behaviors I was exhibiting over the 6 months and my previous psychiatric history because I probably wasn't making much sense at the time.

I ended up involuntarily hospitalized on an MIW, Mental Inquest Warrant (not sure if that's the right name but that's what it was called in the state I lived in at the time) because I was delusional and a danger to myself. The first dx was Bipolar 1 w/ psychotic features, but after several months it was changed to Schizoaffective Disorder Bipolar Type because I was exhibiting many of the symptoms of schizophrenia along with bipolar mood disorder.

That's been my dx ever since, I've seen multiple doctors inpatient and outpatient over the past 8 years and it hasn't changed, I feel it's accurate and I do well on the meds I'm on.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 07:23 PM
  #12
I presented manic to my first appointment with my pdoc. The way I behaved combined with my garbled history made it easy to diagnosis bipolar.

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Default Nov 21, 2019 at 08:13 PM
  #13
Time 1. Told my pcp "do I look depressed? I don't need your ****en medication" when asked why I wasn't on my AD. I got Dx bp2 and a script for depokote
Time 2 I was clearly manic intake took 4+ hrs and they didn't know what to do with me. They called my old pdoc and let me go home. They convinced me to see a pdoc. I went in just for a T.
Time 3 intake took 6 hrs I was all over the place and on medication
Time 4 we went with current Dx.
Time 5 I was psychotic and got a Dx of SzA.

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Default Nov 22, 2019 at 11:15 AM
  #14
My therapist just listened to my history, and then why I was coming to see her. She just told me flat out that I sounded bipolar, and I needed to go see a psychiatrist. He agreed with her.

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Default Nov 22, 2019 at 01:32 PM
  #15
With my first pnurse it took him talking to my dad (I was 17 I think). My dad simply said "she gets hyper, then she gets really sad" and the man just said "sounds like bipolar to me." That's the story of my first diagnosis.

I'm now diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder after numerous hospitalizations for psychosis with no mood symptoms and a thorough intake that asked more questions that never came up before.
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Default Nov 22, 2019 at 03:27 PM
  #16
I was diagnosed with mdd at 14. The ad made me manic. Once she lowered my dose, I was no longer manic but remained hopelessly depressed. Then at 15, I stopped sleeping. I kept having “out of body” experiences. I also told lies and some serious delusions to my mom and dad. Mom will bring something up that she said I said totally off the wall even today and I will have absolutely no recollection.

Then around 17 or 18 I got so better I just assumed I was misdiagnosed and had been “healed”. I stopped taking meds within a couple of years and was mostly entirely stable for around 7-8 years when I had a major psychotic break. There was no denying my bp1 at that point and I know that I will always have to take meds.

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Default Nov 22, 2019 at 08:35 PM
  #17
I spent many years on AD's and Klonopin. The AD helped with depression, the K-pin helped with anxiety. But there were a list of symtoms that medication wasn't touching. For example, for years I had rage episodes and obvious manic behavior of various kinds.

I knew I was "manic-depressive" because I recognized my behavior in books I'd read about certain artists, poets, writers. I read Kay Redfield-Jamison's book Touched with Fire and I identified entirely.

Some years went by, then I started being dx'ed as bipolar. Some wise pdoc put me on Lithium, then Depakote, and so on. I was in my early 30's, but my bipolar symptoms had been around since I was a child.

It took far too long for the correct diagnosis to occur. That's one reason why I do believe diagnoses are essential. They are just for insurance; they give us a paradigm to work with.

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Default Nov 23, 2019 at 03:42 AM
  #18
My first pdoc gave me a provisional diagnosis of bipolar NOS, which basically meant it sounded like bipolar but could be simple depression. At my third appointment though, I presented myself at his office in bright clothing and blue eyeshadow, manic AF, and there was no longer any question that I was bipolar. LOL

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Default Nov 23, 2019 at 05:26 AM
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Are we allowed to give smarty pants replies here? I have some good ones that I am chuckling about but do not want to be disrespectful.

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Heart Nov 23, 2019 at 08:46 AM
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Are we allowed to give smarty pants replies here? I have some good ones that I am chuckling about but do not want to be disrespectful.
Hi!

I tend to think responses a okay as long as they don't hurt anyone and are about your experience. Of couse, if responses might be triggering, just place the proper trigger warnings.

Good to see you!

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