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Poohbah
Member Since Dec 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,280
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Dec 03, 2019 at 02:27 PM
#1
Don’t know what to do. I’ve spoken to her about this repeatedly.
How can i trust someone who does this or even try to make sense of our conversations. This is my best friend and mentor. I don’t have a clue and thank goodness for you people , who keep me going. I don’t mean any offense referring to her son. Many of us have overlapping conditions, but we are not all the same , suited to a one size fits all approach. __________________ Bipolar 2 with anxious distress mixed states & rapid cycling under severe stress tegretol 200 mg wellbutrin 75 mg, cut in half or higher dose as needed Regular aerobic exercise SKILLSET/KNOWLEDGE BASE: Family Medical Advocate Masters in Library Science Multiple Subject Teaching Credential-15 yrs in public schools |
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 bpcyclist
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Dec 03, 2019 at 02:55 PM
#2
Why don't you call her on it?
My Dad lies a lot, and sometimes even starts to believe his own lying. I call him on it, but it often doesn't do a lot of good. He's been like that most of his life. My siblings and I talk about it, but we just have to let it go. I wonder if it is your friend with the issue, rather than her actually thinking she's doing something to "manipulate a mentally ill person". Either way, you may want to talk to her about this. Neither you, nor her son (with the multiple dxs) are children. Neither you, nor her son deserve to be manipulated like one. |
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| bpcyclist, Fuzzybear, luvyrself
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 Fuzzybear, luvyrself
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,326
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Dec 03, 2019 at 05:51 PM
#3
Her lying to you repeatedly would make it impossible to trust her I would think. She is maybe used to talking to her son and unintentionally talks to you the same way?
 Also as the post above mentioned, it doesn't seem to make a lot of sense lying to her son either. Her behaviour is manipulative and unhealthy.  Can you talk to her about this? I have also had people in my life who were very manipulative. 
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| Anonymous46341, bpcyclist
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luvyrself, Tucson
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Mar 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 3,021
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Dec 03, 2019 at 06:39 PM
#4
I'm with BirdDancer and Fuzzybear on this. I'd get it out in the open that you know she's lying and that you'd prefer she be straight up with you. If she agrees, I'd give her a chance to correct her behavior. If it continues after that, I'm not sure I would continue to invest in the relationship.
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| bpcyclist, Fuzzybear
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*Beth*, Fuzzybear
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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Dec 03, 2019 at 09:53 PM
#5
You said you have talked to her about it many times ..... what does she say? How does she defend her lies?!
I’d call her out and honestly if she keeps doing it I’d let that relationship go. Who needs friends who lie? Yeah nobody. Good luck 
__________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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| bpcyclist
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*Beth*
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
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Dec 04, 2019 at 12:05 AM
#6
lying is never good in any relationship no matter the reason.
__________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
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Dec 04, 2019 at 05:56 AM
#7
Lies are a relationship killer.
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Poohbah
Member Since Dec 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,280
8 136 hugs
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Dec 05, 2019 at 01:47 AM
#8
Quote:
__________________ Bipolar 2 with anxious distress mixed states & rapid cycling under severe stress tegretol 200 mg wellbutrin 75 mg, cut in half or higher dose as needed Regular aerobic exercise SKILLSET/KNOWLEDGE BASE: Family Medical Advocate Masters in Library Science Multiple Subject Teaching Credential-15 yrs in public schools |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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12 12.7k hugs
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Dec 05, 2019 at 02:32 AM
#9
Minimizing things is fine for certain things.. but if it’s causing you distress and concerns about trusting her and the lies I think I would disengage from her certainly about your personal thoughts on your illness and any struggles.
I’d find someone new to confide in __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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