Bipolar check-in #42

@Wild Coyote, @yellow_fleurs -- Unfortunately, this has been going on with my sister for YEARS. She's been like this since she was about 14 years old. (Part of the problem is my mom is a HUGE enabler and gives her whatever she wants.) Now she's 21 going on 22 in April. I don't foresee herself stopping this nasty behavior until something so tragic/severe/scary happens to make her change her mind. So I think she needs a slap in the face from reality, and it won't be pretty. I just hope no one gets hurt when that slap comes around.

The ironic thing is that my sister thinks MY DAD is the one with the problems, and she says that "he needs to talk to a therapist to work out his issues." So, she definitely does not see herself as being problematic. She thinks everyone else is the problem. *eye roll*

My pdoc is increasing the dose of Remeron because it's not helping my depression so far.

Sleep is a problem but this time it's too much sleep instead of too little. Coffee and I have become best friends.

Ooooh, I was meaning to ask how old she is. And there it is: old enough to kicked out and left to her own devices. I realize it's unlikely, given your mother's enabling, but imo, it's the only thing that even has a chance of bringing her down to the planet the rest of us live on.

I wonder (because I'm a bit prone to enabling myself) if it's not so much wanting to give her everything she wants as being afraid of the repercussions if NOT doing so. IOW, afraid to stand up to. Not judging, I've very much been there myself.

I have to admit I do rather look forward to her eventual comeuppance.

I also worry how this effects YOU. Sending good vibes.

It's hard to believe you guys grew up in the same house!

Good luck with your car!

Well, I made it through a nine hour work day. I am tired. I will get my first check on this Thursday. All of it will go to the credit card. I did not get SSDI informed about my new job. OOPS

I had my Pdoc appointment yesterday afternoon. I brought my list of symptoms and timeline with me.

He spent a full hour with me. He was really concerned for me and asked a lot of questions.


We discussed the extra lithium and I’m sure it’s helping, but I’m still having symptoms.

we are adding a small dose of Risperdal and getting rid of the Seroquel.


Dx is F31.12 - (sometimes it's good to have a reference point. And to see how a professional views your moods/behaviors, etc.)


I asked for opinions in another thread regarding therapist (helpful or not). I decided to give therapy another try; I scheduled an appointment while I was there.

My mom will probably continue to enable. I want to be optimistic and say she'll stop, but she enables in secret sometimes and then my dad and I find out later on that she has been enabling my sister. So I think these problems will continue as long as my mom continues to enable her. My mom has to learn how to stop, and I have tried numerous times to get her to stop, as has my dad, but she "feels bad" and continues to enable. So in that sense, I would say my mom is the root of the problems, not my sister. My sister just takes advantage of whatever is given to her because she is a sh_tty person.


There are two kinds of people: if someone drops a $20 bill on the ground and doesn't realize it, then the person who sees it fall either keeps it or gives it back. My sister would be the kind to keep it and run away.


And yeah, I observe. My sister and dad try to drag me into their drama, and then they both get mad at me when I don't say what they want to hear. I mean, I will be fair and say that my dad is not 100% innocent all the time, but my sister triggers him with her b_tchy behavior and the he gets exasperated and snaps. But who wouldn't get exasperated and snap when your own daughter is taunting you, saying the things she said yesterday?


It does stress me out, being dragged into this crap. I love my parents, but I don't want to be around them when my sister is there because she picks fights with my dad. I wish I could say I love my sister, but she treats everyone like sh_t (except for my mom, for obvious reasons), and she never ever talks to me unless she wants something. I will literally call her and text her, and she won't respond. I then have to call my mom to call her so that my mom can tell her to call me back. (This is because she takes advantage of my mom all the time, so she is VERY responsive to her.) But then when she needs money for something, she calls me like 3 times until I pick up the phone and she sends a barrage of texts.

My pdoc is increasing the dose of Remeron because it's not helping my depression so far.

Sleep is a problem but this time it's too much sleep instead of too little. Coffee and I have become best friends.

Saw my pdoc today.


He upped my Haldol to 20mg, and added Lexapro at a dose of 10mg. Now to wait around for them to kick in.

I forgot to say... I had my first guitar lesson today.


Everything went well and I learned a lot. The best part was that the entire lesson was supposed to be 30 mins, but it ended up being 47 mins and was only charged $20.


The bad news: my car is having transmission problems... already. ugh. Fortunately, it's still under warranty because it's not past the 3yrs/36,000mi warranty cutoff. I'm bringing it to the dealer for 7am tomorrow. Wish me luck with that...

Well, I made it through a nine hour work day. I am tired. I will get my first check on this Thursday. All of it will go to the credit card. I did not get SSDI informed about my new job. OOPS

I got the blue blahs.

Well, no sleep tonight. Tried for an hour and was just ruminating and planning and all over the place. Totally amped up. Thrashing like a giant halibut on the boat deck. So, that's fine. I'm up and doing my thing.

Have been trying to sort through my whole picture here and not miss anything and one conclusion I have had to come to in the last few days is that: 1) My PTSD is having a huge negative impact on my mental health at the moment, and: 2) I have developed a somewhat hidden (from myself) and elaborate schema for avoiding dealing with this issue and am, in fact, pretending like it does not exist.

None of this is proving very effective or helpful to me, so I am going to have to figure it out. Interestingly, what I think I have discovered by doing a little CBT on this is that I am not actually today actively extremely worried about my actual tormentors. I think I might be able to handle them, sort of. What I am really most afraid of, terrified of, in fact, is being afraid all the time again. So, I'm afraid of being afraid.

So, that's good to know, I think. Now, I just have to figure out what to do about it.

Sending hugs and love to all!!!!

What a terrible situation I don’t really have any advice, your already avoiding her the best you can. There are indeed just shytty people in the world I’m sorry one of them is your sister.