Fear of the dark during mood episodes

FluffyDinosaur · Jan 22, 2020 at 12:19 PM

Anyone else experience that? For me it's caused mostly by feelings that there are malicious presences. Although I never actually see them, it feels like they might appear at any moment. I have to constantly keep an eye on the bedroom door or else it feels like they get closer and closer. It seems to happen mostly during mixed and depressive episodes, although in this case it started about a week before the actual mood changes. I've never had psychosis, but I sometimes worry that these sorts of things could be prodromal symptoms.

bpcyclist · Jan 22, 2020 at 01:38 PM

All the time, usually when getting psychotic.

Sometimes psychotic · Jan 22, 2020 at 03:09 PM

It does sort of have the psychosis vibe....I had this during recovery, I slept with the light on all the time. Some people have compared this to sundowning which occurs in older people.

FluffyDinosaur · Jan 22, 2020 at 03:58 PM

Well that's a little worrying... I have slowly been getting more of this sort of symptoms over the years. I hope it doesn't escalate further.

Sometimes psychotic · Jan 22, 2020 at 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FluffyDinosaur

Well that's a little worrying... I have slowly been getting more of this sort of symptoms over the years. I hope it doesn't escalate further.

It doesn’t sound overtly psychotic though so I wouldn’t worry unless it progresses to something worse.

Moose72 · Jan 22, 2020 at 06:00 PM

I once thought there were people in the walls coming to get me. By "people" I mean entities. My pdoc thought I was - for lack of a better term- "batshit". "You were really out of it" she told me later.

yellow_fleurs · Jan 22, 2020 at 06:08 PM

I actually have experienced this, during what I guess was a mixed episode? I was pretty much scared of everything in a way. Like things just seemed unsafe and kind of like the beginning of a horror movie, but I never actually hallucinated or anything.

FluffyDinosaur · Jan 23, 2020 at 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

It doesn’t sound overtly psychotic though so I wouldn’t worry unless it progresses to something worse.

Thanks, you're probably right. I'm not too worried as long as it doesn't get worse than this, but I'm definitely keeping an eye on it!

FluffyDinosaur · Jan 23, 2020 at 09:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72

I once thought there were people in the walls coming to get me. By "people" I mean entities. My pdoc thought I was - for lack of a better term- "batshit". "You were really out of it" she told me later.

That sounds really scary! I hope you never have to experience that again.

Quote:

Originally Posted by yellow_fleurs

I actually have experienced this, during what I guess was a mixed episode? I was pretty much scared of everything in a way. Like things just seemed unsafe and kind of like the beginning of a horror movie, but I never actually hallucinated or anything.

This sounds pretty similar to my experience. I also become really jumpy, being startled by every unexpected sound, thinking I see shadows out of the corner of my eye, that sort of stuff. It definitely doesn't help when sleep is already hard enough.

fern46 · Jan 23, 2020 at 12:09 PM

I experienced that and my worst fears seem to come forward when it is dark. For me, it was helpful to research what the dark represents to the psyche and what it respresents spiritually, emotionally and mentally. That helped me to better understand what my subconscious was perhaps trying to symbolically say to me. I try not to run from my fears anymore. I've learned they catch up to me eventually and carry a lot more momentum when they do. I'm tired of getting rolled over.

FluffyDinosaur · Jan 23, 2020 at 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fern46

I experienced that and my worst fears seem to come forward when it is dark. For me, it was helpful to research what the dark represents to the psyche and what it respresents spiritually, emotionally and mentally. That helped me to better understand what my subconscious was perhaps trying to symbolically say to me. I try not to run from my fears anymore. I've learned they catch up to me eventually and carry a lot more momentum when they do. I'm tired of getting rolled over.

Thank you, doing research is good advice. I think I'll go and read up on it. If nothing else it's an interesting topic!

fern46 · Jan 23, 2020 at 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FluffyDinosaur

Thank you, doing research is good advice. I think I'll go and read up on it. If nothing else it's an interesting topic!

Definitely interesting if you're up for self exploration. I'd tell you what I found when I went about it, but that would just be me projecting the meaning I took away from it onto you. Good luck, I hope it helps and as always, if you find a path is bad for you, make a turn

Treyfrancis21 · Feb 05, 2020 at 10:35 PM

I had to walk about a mile in the middle of the night in the middle of the desert over 2 hours from anywhere and got super panicked and decided I needed to run, then decided I was over reacting and stopped running in time to sprain my ankle and have to walk limp along another half mile all while carrying a heavy camera backpack. Night time is effing weird.

yellow_fleurs · Feb 06, 2020 at 01:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FluffyDinosaur

That sounds really scary! I hope you never have to experience that again.

This sounds pretty similar to my experience. I also become really jumpy, being startled by every unexpected sound, thinking I see shadows out of the corner of my eye, that sort of stuff. It definitely doesn't help when sleep is already hard enough.

I also got jumpy/startled and all that kind of stuff, too. It does sound similar.

Feb 06, 2020 at 07:46 AM

I get afraid during the dark at times, too. I think (at least in my case) it's "just" anxiety.

*Beth* · Feb 07, 2020 at 06:46 AM

I generally find the dark comforting. That said, I have similar experiences to what you've described, regardless of dark or light. I am unsure as to whether the *whatever* is real, or not. Or, if I'm pretty sure it's not real I can't stop it. From what I've learned those types of experience, particularly if they cause heightened anxiety can be a psychosis when it occurs for an adult.

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bpcyclist Legendary Member Since Sep 2019 Location: Portland Posts: 12,681 (SuperPoster!) 4 40.2k hugs given	Jan 22, 2020 at 01:38 PM #2 All the time, usually when getting psychotic. __________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield
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Sometimes psychotic Legendary Wise Elder Member Since May 2013 Location: Chicago Posts: 26,409 (SuperPoster!) 10 22.8k hugs given	Jan 22, 2020 at 03:09 PM #3 It does sort of have the psychosis vibe....I had this during recovery, I slept with the light on all the time. Some people have compared this to sundowning which occurs in older people. __________________ Hugs!
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FluffyDinosaur Grand Member Member Since Nov 2019 Location: In my head, mostly Posts: 754 4 31 hugs given	Jan 22, 2020 at 03:58 PM #4 Well that's a little worrying... I have slowly been getting more of this sort of symptoms over the years. I hope it doesn't escalate further.
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yellow_fleurs Grand Poohbah Member Since Jun 2018 Location: US Posts: 1,512 5 1,265 hugs given	Jan 22, 2020 at 06:08 PM #7 I actually have experienced this, during what I guess was a mixed episode? I was pretty much scared of everything in a way. Like things just seemed unsafe and kind of like the beginning of a horror movie, but I never actually hallucinated or anything.
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Anonymous43918 Guest Posts: n/a	Feb 06, 2020 at 07:46 AM #15 I get afraid during the dark at times, too. I think (at least in my case) it's "just" anxiety.
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