FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12 12.7k hugs
given |
#21
Thank you Fooze for clearing up that question
__________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
|
Crazy Hitch, FooZe, Wild Coyote
|
Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,354
(SuperPoster!)
13 53.6k hugs
given |
#22
Quote:
A beautiful memorial. __________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote
|
childofchaos831, TunedOut, Wild Coyote
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,543
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#23
My first attempt was at age 16. My most recent was in early 2019. I’m horrified when I’m thinking clearly at what I’ve done. At the time it seems to be the only answer and I am impulsive. I’m not scared to seek help. It just gets that bad that quick and it’s off to the races. I’d like to think I’ve learned from these experiences so it won’t ever happen again.
This is a great thread. I was active on the site in the days before and after my latest attempt and I felt that I couldn’t say a word so I didn’t. There is such a stigma around it that I feel vulnerable and will probably delete this post. I do now have a detailed prevention plan as well as a hope box. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Daonnachd, fern46, Nammu, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, wiretwister, ~Christina
|
Nammu, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, wiretwister, ~Christina
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#24
Quote:
I know how the extreme pain of depression can make life seem so unbearable, but just as that tidal wave came that eventually took him, so can we survive tidal waves. Though I can't speak for everyone, I can say that the worst of times can be left in the past. If only my nephew had gotten proper help and had a life preserver, we might be walking in those same woods today...talking about birds. Talking about how happy we are to be alive, despite some of the deep pain from the past. I do hope you will find more people willing to listen, when you need it. We are here. We understand! I understand the hesitancy to reach out to certain people, under certain conditions. Mental health issues of all sorts, including depression, are still sadly regarded differently than other types of illness. I want that to change. May we all work (in whatever capacity, to whatever degree possible) to help that change. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,472
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,548 hugs
given |
#25
Speaking of prevention plans, I don't know where mine went. I know some things that are on it, though. Call a friend, watch a movie, read a book, go out with a friend and I have the crisis team I can call if I need help. Past that, I can always go to the Psych Emergency Services at the hospital.
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Loxapine 50mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Nammu, Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#26
Hospital no thank you. They hurt me when I was very young and they do not help me.
Respect to all here __________________ |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wild Coyote
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#27
Quote:
__________________ |
|
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
FooZe, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#28
Quote:
I thought of a nice place once.... But I prefer staying with other bears __________________ |
|
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Legendary
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
(SuperPoster!)
7 70.9k hugs
given |
#29
Quote:
You are very courageous to post your experiences here. I am so glad you have survived and are okay. I do think many attempts are impulsive. I am soooo sorry you'd felt you could not share about this and were left all alone to cope with all that was going on for you. I certainly wish I could have been present for you during that time. I am available to you anytime, whatever is going on, no judgment, ever. I love you! __________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Sunflower123, TunedOut, ~Christina
|
Sunflower123, TunedOut, ~Christina
|
Guest
Posts: n/a
|
#30
I've never made an attempt before, but I have had suicidal thoughts for quite some time. I mean, I'm stable now, so I don't have any right now, but I used to be a very, very angry person and then I'd do something I regretted, which in turn gave me suicidal thoughts because the rage was too overwhelming and I realized I hurt a lot of people. Maybe I was depressed. I don't know. But usually when I'm very angry, I get suicidal thoughts.
Whenever I feel that way, I try to see my therapist once a week, if not more often. I also call and talk to her over the phone. I suppose that's what's kept me from making an attempt? The other thing is, my cousin served in Afghanistan and he was left with horrible PTSD. He had suicidal thoughts for quite a while until he finally saw a psychiatrist. However, because of his strength and determination to push through, I feel more motivated to do the same when I'm feeling down. I do worry about him a lot, though. As I mentioned I think a month ago (?), someone I knew made an attempt and succeeded because he wasn't getting treatment for his PTSD and depression. His father said that doctors refused to prescribe him anything, and that the "only way to help him" was with therapy. (Yeah, it was quite a crappy veteran's hospital.) So of course he drank a lot to wash away the horrible feelings, and unfortunately, that only exacerbated the depression until he finally gave up. But this is why my cousin sees a private psychiatrist and private therapist. While some veteran's hospitals are really good, there are a lot of bad ones in the mix. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Nammu, Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#31
They just label us and write us off in this forest
As “beyond help” After 15 minutes
Possible trigger:
__________________ |
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#32
They want “significant change”
Possible trigger:
__________________ |
Reply With Quote |
Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,329
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#33
Being “honest with the providers” doesn’t help
They SUCK There are too many lies.....I do not like them __________________ |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Legendary
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
(SuperPoster!)
7 70.9k hugs
given |
#34
Quote:
Thanks so much for sharing here! Some people feel suicide is a result of anger turned inward. It does not surprise me that you were having suicidal thoughts while also feeling angry. I am sorry, too, that you have gone through this and am glad you are okay! I am glad your cousin recognizes his PTSD and his depression. I hope he continues to want s support/help. I am very sorry you have lost your friend. I hope you never have to feel so horrible again. I am around and you can look me up anytime. I am hoping you will look me up if/when you ever feel this way again. I do not want you suffering all alone. Ever. Love ya! __________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Fuzzybear, Sunflower123, ~Christina
|
Fuzzybear, TunedOut, ~Christina
|
Legendary
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
(SuperPoster!)
7 70.9k hugs
given |
#35
__________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Fuzzybear, Sunflower123, ~Christina
|
Fuzzybear, TunedOut, ~Christina
|
Legendary
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
(SuperPoster!)
7 70.9k hugs
given |
#36
__________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Fuzzybear, Sunflower123, ~Christina
|
Fuzzybear, ~Christina
|
Super Moderator
Community Support Team Community Liaison
Chat Leader Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,411
(SuperPoster!)
9 2,312 hugs
given |
#37
Quote:
I have heard of safety plans which sounds like a "prevention plan" but what is a "hope box" and how do you start one? @CANDC __________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Super Moderator
Community Support Team Community Liaison
Chat Leader Member Since May 2014
Location: Northeast USA New England
Posts: 17,411
(SuperPoster!)
9 2,312 hugs
given |
#38
Quote:
I have heard of safety plans which sounds like a "prevention plan" but what is a "hope box" and how do you start one? @CANDC __________________ Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
|
Reply With Quote |
Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
|
Magnate
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: Napa Valley
Posts: 2,116
18 3,379 hugs
given |
#39
I want to first send a huge Thank you! to Christina and Wild Coyote for getting this thread going. ...And to the administration team for having faith in the members' ability to keep the community safe.
I on occasion struggle with suicidal ideation and impetuous urges so may post here, but mostly I will be reading to make sure that if I can help someone by listening they know that I'm here. I hope most especially that for those fighting urges once they've "gotten it out" here that they will feel somewhat freed of the pressure. __________________ >< |
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, Nammu, Sunflower123, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,543
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
given |
#40
Quote:
|
|
Reply With Quote |
Anonymous46341, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
BipolaRNurse, Daonnachd, FooZe, TunedOut, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
|
Reply |
|