These three....

Actions speak louder than words.

Good post dear Thirty shades, I agree...

(((((( Fuzzybear ))))))

Fuzzy, I understand when someone older and (who should be wiser) does not feel the need to nurture, or protect, or show kindness and affection. There have unfortunately been a number of those people in my immediate family who behaved this way, even people I loved very much. I got used to the idea of unrequited love, long before I ever entered the world of boys and dating and relationships. It never should have been like that for you, for me, or for anyone. But life is complex, and can be difficult.

It is one of the factors that made me very independent. And fortunately, I had others to whom I could occasionally turn for the love and affection I craved. I still wonder to this day, though, how different my life could have been if I (and my brother, it turns out) had been granted the kind of love and acceptance we all deserve as children, and as young adults.

I try to maintain an attitude of love, but perhaps not at close range, and definitely not in the face of anything constituting abuse. It keeps me calm remembering to "love the sinner, but not the sin", if that helps.

I do also recommend always trying to see things from another's point of view. That can definitely help mend a lot of fences. Understanding leads to compassion and an awful lot of forgiveness, all on its own.

The therapist situation---I don't know how to advise anybody, there. Yes, the system is not perfect, and we are dealing with human beings there, which are complex and sometimes frustrating creatures. The only thing I've ever heard that's made any sense, is, Don't stop trying. When you feel strong enough to look elsewhere, go for it. Even online counseling is better than none.

Massive huggs and genuine compassion headed your way!

I also wanted to add: Unconditional love is so hard to find. I have had a lot of people claim to feel it, only to turn and watch them walk away, forever, a short time later. These people clearly did not understand the definition of "unconditional".