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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: La Porte, TX
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#1
Is talking out loud in a stream of consciousness manner related to bipolar or anxiety? I have been doing it more and more lately though it's gone on over a year. It's just been recently I have caught myself doing it in the middle of Wal-mart, not at home when I'm alone. Now I do it at home with H and my daughter, and the thoughts I speak out loud are usually very mundane, boring thoughts no one would even want to hear.
__________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. --Robert Frost |
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Anonymous41462, Fuzzybear
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#2
I don’t think so (but I am not a therapist)
I don’t recall if you have a therapist? __________________ |
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#3
I don't know, but I can say that I talk out loud to myself all of the time. I even do so in public, sometimes. What I say seems interesting to me, but maybe it wouldn't to others. Really, often I just say odd-ball random things or even repeat phrases or make noises. Just yesterday, hubby came into the bedroom from his office asking who I was talking to. I just told him not to worry and that I was talking to myself (and to go back into his office and leave me be). Only about 20 mins ago, I was in his office with him and started to talk to myself. He became annoyed and told me to be quiet (he is working), so I just went to my bedroom and shut the door. I'm happy.
Sometimes I just write and write, whatever. Just write. The whole typing on my keyboard is pleasurable for me, too. I call it "the dance and flight of my mind and fingers”. Really, I feel talking is similar. If one mindfully pays attention to the feelings produced by talking, it's like a pleasurable dance. The feel of the lips and the tongue moving. The air being pushed out and in through the mouth. The noise itself can be soothing or bring about many other sensations. That's often why I make odd noises or repeat phrases. Noises and phrases. Phrases and noises. Ssss. Ssss. Ssssssss. That is rather ticklish. I sometimes lounge on my bed, and while thinking, act out thoughts with gesticulation. Or I wave my arm(s) up, like a conductor does to make music. I think many times, when I'm driving, people think I'm talking on the phone. Maybe they wonder if I'm cursing them out. It can certainly look like I'm letting out a shout. And then there is the car dancing. That's usually done to music, but it may or may not actually be playing from the radio. It could be playing solely in my head. Have you ever seen or heard a little child doing any of the above? If so, it likely makes observers smile. Maybe I'm no longer a child, but I can still play in this world. I don't always need others to play with. Or sometimes what comes from my mouth, through my fingers, or through other bodily expressions, is stress, pain, or other bad feelings figuratively vomited out. Has anyone ever felt sick to their stomachs, but after it comes up and out, a flood of relief sets in? Ahhhhhhhhhh! Last edited by Anonymous46341; Mar 25, 2020 at 03:29 PM.. |
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Anonymous41462, Fuzzybear, unaluna, Wild Coyote
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unaluna, Wild Coyote
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: La Porte, TX
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#4
Fuzzybear, No I don't have a T.
BirdDancer - I am glad I'm not the only one. I wonder how it ties into society? Very strained internet here; now that school is online, everyone is on Netflix, Hulu, Amazon, VuDu; we've got a stay at home work as home order in this county though since you can get groceries, pick up prescriptions, do laundry, take walks (though don't touch the park benches or play equipment, that's prohibited!)., it's pretty much like the weekend with no sports and spotty internet and the park splashpad turned off. __________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. --Robert Frost |
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Anonymous41462
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#5
I have no idea. In my case, it has zero to do with society. Society has zero to do with my talking out loud. If they happen to observe that's fine with me. I don't really care much what they think. It's all in my own private world.
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Anonymous41462
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: La Porte, TX
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#6
Sorry, I meant psychology!
__________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, , propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, omeperazole I shall be telling this with a sigh Somewhere ages and ages hence: two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. --Robert Frost |
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#7
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Anonymous41462
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#8
My daughter was always a stream of consciousness talker. I had to pay really close attention because she'd slip really important things in-between talking about who wanted to hold who's hand in the lunchroom and what color bicycle she wanted for her birthday. I love that trait about her. She is just so honest and genuine, even at 29.
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Anonymous41462
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#9
Quote:
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Anonymous41462
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#10
That's ''nice'' - having a ''mother'' who appreciates their daughter....
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#11
@Blueberrybook: This is a very interesting thread! I find talking to oneself very funny! I don't do it often but i find it comforting so what is the harm? I talk to my dog a lot. I enjoy it. Perhaps the psychology of it is that we're a little lonely or wanting to hear the sound of our own voices. Stream-of-consciousness chatter is benign but unfortunately i often insult myself and call myself a stupid idiot or mutter that i'm so embarrassed. That's all very painful of course. I just have a chemical imbalance in my brain, i feel, just too much negative chemical, cortisol. Talk therapy is not appropriate in the same way that talk therapy is not appropriate for cancer. Meds help, but i'm still stuck with the mood stuff. Anyways, that's waaaaaaaaaay too much about me. When i lived in Vancouver there were all types out and about and one man in McDonald's would put a pair of eye-glasses on the table across to him and talk to his invisible friend and feed him French Fries! A fun name for an invisible friend is "Itchy."
@sophiebunny: It's so nice that you are enjoying your daughter and her quirks! @BirdDancer: You're funny! You sound kind of manic but very happy. Am i right? I love to journal too! I'm mad about writing on my computer too! I've been at it for 20 years! i write about a meg a year! That's loads! I've considered wiling them to science, perhaps a university student studying bipolar could get a thesis out of them, but then i reread them and it's so mundane i think not. I might like to read them when i'm old but if nothing ever comes of them, that's okay, i like writing them and it keeps me company. What a strange phenomenon it is, writing on the computer for pleasure but no other purpose?! |
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Anonymous46341, Fuzzybear
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#12
Thank you Fuzzy Bear. My daughter is an amazing person and also blind which makes our relationship all the more close. I'll pass your compliment along to her. I'm sure she'll appreciate it.
Last edited by sophiebunny; Mar 29, 2020 at 11:18 PM.. |
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Anonymous41462
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#13
Mostly I just grrrrrrrowl......
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#14
Hi Fuzzybear. I just got a text from my daughter. She read your comment on this board. She said "what's with the quotation marks, mom?" She has a screen reader that includes reading punctuation and includes vocal inflection. It's how the blind get cues from text. I said "everyone needs a hobby, honey". She said "LOL". Thank you Fuzzybear for the humor. Sending the same humor back at you.
Last edited by sophiebunny; Mar 31, 2020 at 03:32 AM.. |
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Grand Magnate
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Location: KY
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#15
To me, it doesn’t sound like it relates to mental illness in your case. Especially if it occurs naturally and/or you enjoy it.
The only times I’ve ever done it are when very manic and as a manifestation of my pressured speech. __________________ ***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
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