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Magnate
Daonnachd
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Member Since: Feb 2006
Location: Napa Valley
Posts: 2,116
3,379 hugs
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#21
Quote:
Tell my wife?! No. I'm not suicidal, just not well. I'm hanging on to the hope of ECT soon. The coordinator has tentatively rescheduled me for next Friday, the 5th. If my wife tests negative I'll be able to do it. __________________ >< |
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Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Anonymous46341
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#22
My husband just found that the announcement about layoffs from his employer would be this Friday, May 8 and not Wednesday, May 6. That is almost frustrating to learn. I almost wish we knew already. The waiting sucks! Plus, I told my psychiatrist it would be on May 6 and he deliberately scheduled an extra session for that day. I won't bother to contact him with a correction, but it will be awkward telling him the date was wrong. From what I recall, he said that was the only available time that week, anyway.
The weather is so sucky today! Miserable! Everything feels miserable. |
Anonymous41462, Daonnachd, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Crone
Nammu
has no updates.
Member Since: May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 70,982
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53.4k hugs
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#23
It's brilliantly sunny today but a bit chilly with the wind. But still I sat outside for a bit. The bits between the wind were very nice and the air smelled clean and fresh. I think around Mother's Day I will buy the annuals to plant in the flower box. I'll do what I did last year and get two different flowers in different colors. My governor extended stay at home to the 18th. but I agree with him. It's just dragging on. But getting out on the deck will help and the days will get warmer.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
Anonymous46341, Daonnachd, Innerzone, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Sunflower123
has no updates.
Member Since: Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,543
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95k hugs
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#24
I had a fraudulent charge for $447.64 on my bank statement today. It was for Bestbuy.com. The bank said it could take up to 5 days to resolve. I said I’m on disability and need that money promptly. Some people just suck. I didn’t need that today as I was already down.
In good news, I’ll get to see my daughter on Mother’s Day which is also my birthday. Really looking forward to that. I’ve been busy and things are hopping around here. I’m doing well except for today and ongoing panic attacks. I’m going to bed early to reset. Warm regards to all and hugs to those that are struggling. |
Anonymous41462, Anonymous46341, Blue_Bird, Daonnachd, Innerzone, Nammu, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Nammu, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Silver Swan
Moose72
has no updates.
Member Since: Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,417
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2,512 hugs
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#25
I read all posts. Im worried about you, @Daonnachd.
Warning: TMI: Short version: Yesterday, I developed hemorrhoids- inside and out. And today they began bleeding. Like a heavy day on your period. I called my dr and she said to skip my blood thinner tonight and watch for things like lightheadedness, vomiting, etc. Yesterday, I was in pain and miserable. Today I feel better even after having a couple bowel movements. My dr even said to go to the ER if I get abdominal pain, etc. Nope. Just eating high-fiber crackers and drinking water. End TMI. __________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
Anonymous46341, Daonnachd, Nammu, Sunflower123
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Daonnachd
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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 35,842
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8,655 hugs
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#26
I’ve been all over the place these past 3 days. Tuesday was a really good day. Yesterday not so good. Today was a mixed day. I feel like **** right now. I guess this virus is just really ****ing with me. And also my PMDD. I haven’t emailed my therapist. I guess the whole “I don’t have time” thing she said about my emails is just kinda sticking with me. Even if it’s not against me. It just seemed like it was.
__________________ Ridin' with Biden |
Anonymous46341, Daonnachd, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Silver Swan
Moose72
has no updates.
Member Since: Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,417
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#27
@Mountaindewed I don't blame you - if my T or pdoc told me they didn't have time for me, I'd feel terrible. Talk about ouch!
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
Mountaindewed
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Guest
Anonymous35014
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#28
Quote:
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Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Moose72, Mountaindewed, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Poohbah
Scooter9
has no updates.
Member Since: May 2018
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,190
79 hugs
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#29
I had my pdoc appointment today by phone.
No med changes. She acknowledged my anxiety and depression but said there's not much else she can do for me at the moment. I'm waiting for an appointment with a special mental health clinic. I've been there twice before and it's where I got my bipolar diagnosis. They do research there and it's where I got my treatment plan from. So my pdoc just follows that treatment plan and we've reached the end of the last one I got so now I need a new plan. The Wellbutrin is partially working. We'll wait another 2 weeks to see if it's affecting my sleep. I'm still feeling depressed and generally quite low. Lots of negative thoughts and the anxiety isn't helping. My pdoc did say I'm coping well so that's good news. The Wellbutrin is reducing the body pains I have from the depression. It's just a small reduction at the moment but it's better than it was. A friend is coming over this weekend for lunch. We'll meet in the backyard and the weather is supposed to be warmer by then. __________________ * Dx: Unspecified Bipolar and Related Disorder * Rx: Latuda, Remeron, Prozac, Klonopin, Vraylar My avatar picture is a photo of the Whirlpool Galaxy I took in April 2023. I dedicated this photo to my sister who passed away in July 2016. |
Innerzone, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
~Christina
has no updates.
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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12.7k hugs
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#30
Quote:
Going to be a fabulous Mothers Day seeing M __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Nammu, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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Nammu, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
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metamorphosist
wing
Is enjoying being back!
Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Southern US
Posts: 18,546
(SuperPoster!)
1,560 hugs
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#31
Quote:
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Anonymous46341, Sunflower123
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Guest
Anonymous35014
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#32
I slept fine -- 10pm until 4am, then 5am until 7am. However, when I woke up (like 15 or 20 mins after waking up), the lady and the man were making fun of me, but not the same lady and man as in the past. These two people were in their 20s like me, unlike the other man and woman who were much older (man in his upper 60s and woman in her 50s). I don't know why they kept insulting me. I didn't do anything?
I have a therapy appt today, so I will let my therapist know that people are talking about me in secret. It happened on Wednesday too, but it was only one person, not two talking about me in front of me. Otherwise, same ol' same ol'. Fortunately, it's Friday and I can escape the world after 7pm! (That's when my work day ends and I can go watch TV or something.) However, why people choose to work until 7pm on a Friday is beyond me. Everyone is on the east coast, so it makes no sense. Whatever floats people's boats, I guess. I'm going to start work late on Monday morning, then, to make up for the excessively long day today. |
Anonymous46341, Blue_Bird, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Blue_Bird, Wild Coyote, ~Christina
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Member
251turnaround
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 272
10 hugs
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#33
After years of being in the dark, my mother told me that there actually is a family history of bipolar. Some of my relatives that I suspected have it do in fact have it. This kind of blew my mind because I had been questioning my diagnosis so much based on that. Now it's all starting to make sense. My aunt and cousin have gone through some serious mental health difficulties that I attributed to the BPD which also is common in my family. I was told my aunt had a bit of a psychotic episode when she was in high school. I should've figured it out then.
Having this knowledge may finally allow me to stop questioning everything and put that energy to better use somewhere else, though I doubt it's going to be that simple. I don't think there's anything a doctor could say that would convince me I actually have bipolar. I think they're all wrong. __________________ I>/\\/ Dx: Bipolar I w/ mixed features, BPD, ADHD, Anxiety, Gender dysphoria, ASD |
Anonymous46341, fern46, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25, ~Christina
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wildflowerchild25, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
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#34
My doctor increased my AD and told me to start actually taking my prn anxiety medication (klonopin) since my anxiety has been so bad (I have a habit of not taking it no matter how bad things get and then things just end up getting totally unmanageable, so she had me promise I would take it)
Things are going pretty well. My mood is good, I'm feeling positive. Doing better with fighting off/re-framing negative thoughts. I feel pretty hopeful now, I think things will continue to get better. Mindfulness and meditation are very helpful to me. Cleaned some of my apartment today. Doing it a little at a time so I don't get overwhelmed. Will do some more tomorrow. My sister is dropping off my money and some McDonald's today. Looking forward to that, I've been craving a Big Mac. Was gonna go grocery shopping this weekend but there's too many people in the stores on the weekend and it causes me to panic so I'm gonna try going early Monday instead. I made a big purchase yesterday, something I've wanted for a very long time, I figured I would treat myself since I've gone through such a rough time for the past several months. I ordered an Xbox One. So hyped about getting that. Played my ukulele a bit today, trying to get back into my hobbies. Anyway.. I hope everyone is hanging in there __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Anonymous41462, Anonymous46341, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Sometimes psychotic, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Blue_Bird
is ready for recovery!
Member Since: Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,661
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14.3k hugs
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#35
Quote:
__________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Anonymous46341, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Legendary
Community Liaison
Wild Coyote
has no updates.
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 12,735
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70.9k hugs
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#36
A warm hello to all,
Today, I was reminded that I have not posted here in awhile. I have been experiencing an exacerbation of illnesses since discontinuing an immune suppressant medication. I have chosen to discontinue the med because it puts me at a rather severe disadvantage should I contract COVID. I have had such severe pain and fatigue that I am now reconsidering this decision. I have not been able to be here very often. I am way behind on responding to PMs. My apologies. I hope my tardiness has not hurt anyone on any level. My failure to respond in a timely manner is nothing personal. I have had an incredible number of PMs to read. I have been trying to get though as many as possible and have been trying to respond as well. I have also been trying to contribute to the forum by responding to one or two posts a day and have fallen short of that goal recently. I hope to be around more in the near future. I miss you all when I am away. Love and Good Health to ALL "Socially distanced. Spiritually connected." ~ Andrew Cuomo __________________ May we each fully claim the courage to live from our hearts, to allow Love, Faith and Hope to enLighten our paths. |
Anonymous43918, Anonymous46341, Blue_Bird, Fuzzybear, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25, ~Christina
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Nammu, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
~Christina
has no updates.
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12.7k hugs
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#37
Quote:
Love ya __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Anonymous46341, Fuzzybear, Sunflower123
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Fuzzybear, Innerzone, Sunflower123
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Elder
wildflowerchild25
has no updates.
Member Since: Mar 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 6,431
9,545 hugs
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#38
I feel slightly calmer. Still very agitated, but not like I NEED to harm myself RIGHT NOW or I will explode. It’s thundering out so I can’t take a walk. I could clean, I guess. That might be useful. I’m getting tired of my winter stuff. It might be nice to bring out my spring/summer clothes.
The weekend is supposed to be nice. I will have to poke around in my garden to see which veggies survived the frost and the onslaught of rain. I’ve already forgotten what is what. I did put the stakes in so hopefully they are still there. I just took another 5mg haldol since I am technically supposed to take 5mg twice a day, not ten at night. Hopefully it will help curb the agitation throughout the day. __________________ Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
Anonymous43918, Anonymous46341, Innerzone, Nammu, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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~Christina
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
~Christina
has no updates.
Member Since: Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
(SuperPoster!)
12.7k hugs
given |
#39
Well yesterday while I was out to see my rhuemy.. We had the talk about the Pro/Con of staying on a medication that lowers my ability to fight off infections.. The only times I go out is to buy groceries, Meds or a Doctor appt he feels that since my pain is so awful Fibro wise that stopping my Xeljanz that is helping with the joint pain might put me on a ledge.. So I am beyond careful and stay away from people...
Monday my husband went to the hospital for a chest xray, labs and culture.. they flipped him from Doxicycline to Augmentin and yesterday the cultures grew out and now he is flipped onto Bactrium ! 3rd antibiotic 3 times the charm right ???? Hes been really sick 3 weeks now.. He truly needs a break, I need a break. Ordered a new Stethoscope so I can monitor his breathing daily. It should arrive Monday. So the Saga of my husband being ill continues Hope everyone is having a good Friday __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
Anonymous43918, Anonymous46341, BeyondtheRainbow, Blue_Bird, Fuzzybear, Innerzone, Moose72, Nammu, Sunflower123, Victoria'smom, wildflowerchild25
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Fuzzybear, Nammu, Sunflower123
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Wisest Elder Ever
Fuzzybear
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,301
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81.2k hugs
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#40
ANP’s and EP’s... something I read (on a blog? Not on pc) last night.. could be relevant to me
ETA this is just “my stuff” ..And something I read last night. I have not, personally, found the professionals irl to be enlightened or supportive re bipolar (or any other mental health dx either . Only last night I was reading another blog which confirmed my opinion. Not that my opinion is necessarily “right’`... yet it is my truth and my experience (over years in this forest irl) Maybe I “should” have put it in a journal, right now I don’t have much of a functional journal. I’m working on it ETA I have a headache. And I have interrupted Papa bear’s TV again and given him a headache. He is watching Monty Don __________________ Last edited by Fuzzybear; May 01, 2020 at 03:48 PM.. |
Sunflower123, ~Christina
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Sunflower123, ~Christina
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