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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:11 AM
  #21
I hate the meds but injection was suggested then I was told no. As there isn't a shot for my Depakote just my Aririprazole. They said there is no point this was last year.

Depakote I take 1,000mg in the morning and 500mg at night

Aririprazole I take 25mg in the morning
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:26 AM
  #22
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Originally Posted by Miss Laura View Post
I hate the meds but injection was suggested then I was told no. As there isn't a shot for my Depakote just my Aririprazole. They said there is no point this was last year.

Depakote I take 1,000mg in the morning and 500mg at night

Aririprazole I take 25mg in the morning
My mom would say when I was little and hated pills... We can just take it like a big girl, or we can crush it up and eat it in applesauce. Whatever works.

Maybe there's a way to mask the pills?
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:32 AM
  #23
I've tried with water and diluting juice and fresh orange juice nothing works plus Depakote is big so you can't crush them. I'm caught between a rock and a hard place
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:37 AM
  #24
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I've tried with water and diluting juice and fresh orange juice nothing works plus Depakote is big so you can't crush them. I'm caught between a rock and a hard place
Dose it make you gag? It is quite rare that a patient simply cannot take it physically. The challenge is usually mental. In the event it is impossible, your med team needs to find an alternative that is available in a shot or something you can crush. If you wanted to be compliant, it would be a good next step to advocate for that. You're off meds anyway, so now would be a good time to explain the issue and make a switch.
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 06:44 AM
  #25
Yeah it makes me gag.... it's also in my head seen as a punishment and everytime I see my meds i get angry really angry. The joke is I was able to take Anti-depressants in 2009-2010 but when I changed to mood stabiliser I was compliant for a bit then I go skoo-wiff (unsure if this is a Scottish word or universal) it means I go crazy. I become delusional due to them being tampered with. I think they are poisoned at the moment.

- Poisioned
- Evil
- God is punishing me
- Gagging

Thats whats in my head re meds

Meds are staring me in the face post it notes staring me in the face apps going off on my phone alarns going off on my phone calendar ringing to take them. What else can I do?
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Default Aug 03, 2020 at 07:03 AM
  #26
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Originally Posted by Miss Laura View Post
Yeah it makes me gag.... it's also in my head seen as a punishment and everytime I see my meds i get angry really angry. The joke is I was able to take Anti-depressants in 2009-2010 but when I changed to mood stabiliser I was compliant for a bit then I go skoo-wiff (unsure if this is a Scottish word or universal) it means I go crazy. I become delusional due to them being tampered with. I think they are poisoned at the moment.

- Poisioned
- Evil
- God is punishing me
- Gagging

Thats whats in my head re meds

Meds are staring me in the face post it notes staring me in the face apps going off on my phone alarns going off on my phone calendar ringing to take them. What else can I do?
I think you need to realize who the adversary is. It isn't the meds. You and your thoughts are keeping you in this loop.

How to get out of it? There are many ways. Developing a strategy is key. You can do that alone or with help from a therapist or coach.

It is like battling ruminating thoughts. When the lie comes into your brain, you need to recognize it and then reprogram yourself with the truth. So maybe a first step is to tell yourself 'the meds aren't the enemy. The lies I tell myself are.'

Make a list of times the meds helped you. Talk to people here about how meds have helped them in the past. Make a list of the adverse effects that happen when you do not take meds. Have your sister make a list of what it is like around you when you're off meds. Meditate and imagine successfully taking your meds and getting even again and fully enjoying life safely. Program the reminders on your phone to remind you that your meds actually help and keep you out of the trouble you get into. Develop mantras to assist you. Reward yourself for taking your meds.

I could go on, but it is all about rewiring the brain and exposing yourself to what you fear or what angers you. One step at a time it gets easier, but you need a strategy that is multifaceted and a strong will to start. You also need support and the willingness to be honest with those who support you.

Over time, your brain will see that the end point is no longer refusing meds. It will see that taking the meds is where you go each time. Then, it will rewire itself to make it easier and easier. The thoughts of punishment, evil, etc. will lessen the more you counteract them with the knowledge you're doing the right thing. Eventually, taking your meds will be like riding a bike. It all starts with wanting to change and pushing yourself to be uncomfortable for a while for the promise of the greater good.

God isn't punishing you. You're punishing yourself. Its ok though. There are infinite paths out when you're ready.
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 04:36 AM
  #27
I'm struggling with this as my team are off on holiday this week unfortunately. My Peer Support Worker and Therapist are off this week. I have my CPN but I'm dubious about talking to her. I don't think i get anywhere with her. I'm speaking to my Worker on 11th so countdown is on.

I have things to tell them... that I can't say to people irl...

I understand I have to own this, I'm not trying to dismiss my ownership. I'm just not sure where to start or what to do.

I thought about if they had an injection if i would take it. Everyone tells me its a control thing with me. I can control the meds but injection I wouldn't be able to.

I feel like I'm just a huge screw up and have no one that's willing to help me out i can't see it anyways.

Sorry!
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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 12:26 PM
  #28
The 11th is a whole week away. You can handle it how ever you feel safest; if it were me, I'd be absolutely miserable to be in torment for a week.

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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 01:08 PM
  #29
I'm probably going back on injections. Even though my other medications are not injections. I can't swallow pills. See if you can switch to another medication that is not depakote comes in a liquid form.

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Default Aug 04, 2020 at 01:30 PM
  #30
Depakote comes in sprinkles that are capsules you open and scatter on some food (like applesauce or pudding) and take it that way. No pill swallowing, no gagging.

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Default Aug 06, 2020 at 11:04 AM
  #31
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Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow View Post
Depakote comes in sprinkles that are capsules you open and scatter on some food (like applesauce or pudding) and take it that way. No pill swallowing, no gagging.
I don't think we have it in the UK as no-one has ever told me about it. I tried calling my CPN today but she wasn't answering her phone the receptionist said I could leave a message but I declined tbh it was a massive relief I was in midst of an anxiety attack.

I'll need to wait until 11th to speak to my worker. Its not too long I suppose. I think i have mellowed in symptoms. I don't feel so hyped up etc
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