The roaring from the jackhammers from our balcony repair project was awful today. I was waiting on a delivery so i couldn't leave til 2:00pm. I fled to the mall but because of COVID seating is limited and i could only get a bar-stool-seat which is not comfortable. So i dragged myself back home and luckily the workmen had quit early today and it was quiet. I am sure appreciating the quiet.

Tomorrow the weather is nice so i'll just go outside with my dog if the noise continues, which it probably will. Noise is just a nuisance tho, not a threat to my safety, like the fire or hurricane in the US. Tho our COVID numbers are climbing and my city is a hotspot.

I guess things are tough all over. I'm bored too but i'm sure many are bored with COVID on. Boredom can't kill you, tho you might wish it could, haha!

Hugs to all who struggle especially those effected by fire and hurricane.

[Victoria'smom]

I'm doing okay still ED relapse, still randomly crying and worried for no reason. Dealing with a lot attitude, when it is safe again he's moving to the dorms or something. He had a student interview today and he rocked it. I need to figure out more things to do inside.

[childofchaos831]

Hey y'all. Sorry for the radio silence. I've had a rough go of it lately. My last post, I was in a psych ward after...

(triggered because of explanation, not necessarily graphic nature, but could still be triggering)

Possible trigger:

...a suicide attempt that put me in the medical hospital back on the 15th of August. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and 3 in a regular room. I had some serious neurological complications, like standing and walking issues, that got better after a few days, but I'm also still having some tremors in my hands even now. I also had a couple moments of acting out of character for myself that resulted in my being restrained, which really frightened me, when I woke up and started becoming aware again. And I was confused when they told me why... because I knew it was two things *I* would never do... and I'm having some aphasia now, too. I'm having issues recalling words for things that I want to say. I can remember words told to me that I'm asked to remember just fine, but when I'm speaking, I'll randomly come across a word that I can't recall for the life of me. It was "wonton soup" the other day and "practical" today.

That last post was on the 21st.

I started running a fever shortly after that and having some medical symptoms... on the 23rd, the psych facility sent me to the ER to get checked out after a fever of 102 and not being able to register a blood pressure. I ended up having a really serious kidney infection that had gone septic. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and another 7 in a regular room for IV antibiotics.

Then I was sent to a different psych hospital, because the one I had been at was full at that point, and spent 7 days there. So, all in all, I spent 25 days in the hospital. With two brief ambulance ride and one cab trip in there. Didnt get to go home at all during that time.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I'm doing okay still ED relapse, still randomly crying and worried for no reason. Dealing with a lot attitude, when it is safe again he's moving to the dorms or something. He had a student interview today and he rocked it. I need to figure out more things to do inside.

You have a totally appropos cause for crying...

Hugs!!

[Daonnachd]

@childofchaos831 I'm glad they figured out the kidney infection quickly. All in all, 25 days in hospital but you're home now, right?

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

Hey y'all. Sorry for the radio silence. I've had a rough go of it lately. My last post, I was in a psych ward after...

(triggered because of explanation, not necessarily graphic nature, but could still be triggering)

Possible trigger:

...a suicide attempt that put me in the medical hospital back on the 15th of August. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and 3 in a regular room. I had some serious neurological complications, like standing and walking issues, that got better after a few days, but I'm also still having some tremors in my hands even now. I also had a couple moments of acting out of character for myself that resulted in my being restrained, which really frightened me, when I woke up and started becoming aware again. And I was confused when they told me why... because I knew it was two things *I* would never do... and I'm having some aphasia now, too. I'm having issues recalling words for things that I want to say. I can remember words told to me that I'm asked to remember just fine, but when I'm speaking, I'll randomly come across a word that I can't recall for the life of me. It was "wonton soup" the other day and "practical" today.

That last post was on the 21st.

I started running a fever shortly after that and having some medical symptoms... on the 23rd, the psych facility sent me to the ER to get checked out after a fever of 102 and not being able to register a blood pressure. I ended up having a really serious kidney infection that had gone septic. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and another 7 in a regular room for IV antibiotics.

Then I was sent to a different psych hospital, because the one I had been at was full at that point, and spent 7 days there. So, all in all, I spent 25 days in the hospital. With two brief ambulance ride and one cab trip in there. Didnt get to go home at all during that time.

Good Lord, you guys, what an incredibly trying time. Hugs and support and love to you all!!!!!!

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Are you feeling any bettter Daonnachd?

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BethRags

They were little pink fetuses. I don't have that much contact with my sister, especially since covid. But I love her and wish we spoke more often. She's 18 years older than I am, so the age gap kind-of keeps us from being as close as I'd like to be. I've been worrying about my sister and BIL with covid, since they're both in their late 70's.

My third and last pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage at 4 months. Sometimes I dream about it...that loss was so, so awful. Somehow all those worries and losses got balled up in my mind and resulted in a really horrid nightmare.

It's sad that no one wants to buy your piano. There must be some people who still play pianos in the U.S. Sheesh.

I would sell the washer/dryer as a set. It seems to me that if you break them up it will be harder to sell each one.

Yes I agree about splitting up the washer and dryer. But somebody really wants just the washer. I guess she already has a dryer?

My mom had said she might like to take the piano but I guess she changed her mind.

I'm sorry to hear that you had a late loss. That was hard I'm sure.

It's too bad you don't connect much with your sister - you'd think that as adults age wouldn't matter that much.

[childofchaos831]

Originally Posted by Daonnachd

@childofchaos831 I'm glad they figured out the kidney infection quickly. All in all, 25 days in hospital but you're home now, right?

Yea, I've been home for about a week. I got out Wednesday, last week. It is still a little strange to be home though, oddly.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

My Abby cat is curled up tightly against my leg. She's never snuggled like this. Maybe she's finally getting through her grief. What a sweet girl she is.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

Hey y'all. Sorry for the radio silence. I've had a rough go of it lately. My last post, I was in a psych ward after...

(triggered because of explanation, not necessarily graphic nature, but could still be triggering)

Possible trigger:

...a suicide attempt that put me in the medical hospital back on the 15th of August. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and 3 in a regular room. I had some serious neurological complications, like standing and walking issues, that got better after a few days, but I'm also still having some tremors in my hands even now. I also had a couple moments of acting out of character for myself that resulted in my being restrained, which really frightened me, when I woke up and started becoming aware again. And I was confused when they told me why... because I knew it was two things *I* would never do... and I'm having some aphasia now, too. I'm having issues recalling words for things that I want to say. I can remember words told to me that I'm asked to remember just fine, but when I'm speaking, I'll randomly come across a word that I can't recall for the life of me. It was "wonton soup" the other day and "practical" today.

That last post was on the 21st.

I started running a fever shortly after that and having some medical symptoms... on the 23rd, the psych facility sent me to the ER to get checked out after a fever of 102 and not being able to register a blood pressure. I ended up having a really serious kidney infection that had gone septic. I had to spend 3 days in ICU and another 7 in a regular room for IV antibiotics.

Then I was sent to a different psych hospital, because the one I had been at was full at that point, and spent 7 days there. So, all in all, I spent 25 days in the hospital. With two brief ambulance ride and one cab trip in there. Didnt get to go home at all during that time.

glad you're back and seem to be doing swell. That must've been really hard for you- all of it.

[childofchaos831]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Good Lord, you guys, what an incredibly trying time. Hugs and support and love to you all!!!!!!

Thanks bp! Yea, definitely trying... we had been feeling better at the first psych facility and were getting close to going home. Probably going to be Tuesday. Then Sunday we got sent to the ER... we started getting depressed and sui while we were in the medical hospital for the sepsis... started crying everyday, multiple times a day. Hiding it from the nurses and not telling the psych. We were telling him we were sui, just not how bad. We didn't want to have a sitter again. That was one of the more annoying things from the first hospital. We had a sitter the whole time.

[childofchaos831]

Originally Posted by Moose72

glad you're back and seem to be doing swell. That must've been really hard for you- all of it.

Thanks moose! It was pretty hard. We started crying in the third hospital because we just wanted to go home... and we still had one hospital to go, and knew it. We are still getting used to society and people again. Mostly just talking to people in therapy and doctors and a couple friends/family members. Our circle is very limited right now, by choice. We are slowly introducing more people back in.

We may disappear again, if it becomes to much talking to people. But we are going to try.

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

I'm curious. What is the thinking behind moving to France first (for a rather short time IIRC) and then to Czech Republic? You don't need to answer if you don't want, I'm just curious. Glad you're trip is going pretty well.

HI Innerzone. It's actually the opposite. Our plan is to live in Czech Republic first (at least a year), then retire in France.

An advantage to eventually living in France is that both of our French language skills are good, not just one (Hubby speaks Czech, but I do not). Also, hubby was interested in a better climate, which he thinks/thought France has. Czech Republic is quite overcast during more months.

It's hard to explain, but my husband has some reservations about life in Czech Republic. The problem is that his memories are mostly from communist Czechoslovakia and not the now more democratic Czech Republic. He has criticized Czech culture, but really he doesn't fully know how/if certain things have changed. When he came to the US in the 1980s, America seemed an almost utopia. Sadly, it's not a utopia. It has issues like other places, though perhaps not the same ones. Ditto for France.

What he's experienced is the notion that "The grass is greener on the other side." Truth is, you don't fully know that until you live on the other side for a while. And what is green to one isn't necessarily to another.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

Thanks bp! Yea, definitely trying... we had been feeling better at the first psych facility and were getting close to going home. Probably going to be Tuesday. Then Sunday we got sent to the ER... we started getting depressed and sui while we were in the medical hospital for the sepsis... started crying everyday, multiple times a day. Hiding it from the nurses and not telling the psych. We were telling him we were sui, just not how bad. We didn't want to have a sitter again. That was one of the more annoying things from the first hospital. We had a sitter the whole time.

I assume there was a med change hopefully?

[childofchaos831]

Yea, they stopped 4 and lowered 1, oddly

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by childofchaos831

Yea, they stopped 4 and lowered 1, oddly

Please tell us rt away if you guys or any of you is suicidal. It is not a solution. I tried twice. Don't ever do it. God loves you all!!! And so de we!!

[bpcyclist]

The stinpot woke me at 0309 to party, then, headed straight for his perch. Stinker!!!

Been "Home" for a few days. At least I have a bed to sleep in, food to eat, and the luxuries I'm accustomed to. Right now things are quiet and peaceful but it won't always be this way. I guess I'll just enjoy it while it lasts. I need to find a new job and figure out life again. I'm too damn tired to keep this charade of a life up much longer.

[Innerzone]

Our air quality has been downgraded from "hazardous" to "very unhealthy". Hopefully it'll keep heading in that direction. Still, the library cancelled my hold pick up because they're closed due to the smoke. I have to reschedule. Was really looking forward to it. Hopefully I can get in soon. Well, yanno, not "in", but up to the front door.

Oh. And I came home last night (my "Friday") to find I hadn't closed the freezer door all the way. Nearly everything thawed. Unfortunately, I had just filled it. Fortunately, I don't have much space (one shelf of a small refrigerator's freezer), so it's not tons of food. (And fortunately, my roommate only had a bag of veggies in there.)

Mood-wise, I don't know. Just going through the motions. Very blah.