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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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#781
Quote:
I agree with your mom. __________________ |
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Blue_Bird
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
4 23.7k hugs
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#782
Quote:
Lovely photo! We do have such a special group here. __________________ |
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Soupe du jour
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Soupe du jour
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
4 23.7k hugs
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#783
You're amazing, Gaby! The last year of my mom's life she was mean and extremely difficult to be around. She was harsh to me and downright cruel to my sister. Our other sister told my mom to knock it off. That sister never helped take care of our mother, but I can hardly blame her. We wondered if she was beginning to slip into dementia (she was mentally ill), or if maybe her brain wasn't getting enough oxygen (she had congestive heart failure). I don't know what was going on, but it was a sad year with her. __________________ |
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Anonymous41462, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Soupe du jour
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lightly toasted
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,467
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16 2,542 hugs
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#784
Quote:
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,467
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,542 hugs
given |
#785
Quote:
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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lightly toasted, Nammu
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 71,266
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13 53.6k hugs
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#786
My sister is driving me crazy today. She brought her vacuum cleaner and is moving all the furniture but doesn’t put it back where it belongs. It’s nice of her to do tho cause of my back I can’t move the furniture. But I’m irritated all the same though I shouldn’t be. She got here right after I woke up so I haven’t had my alone time with my chai to wake up. I feel selfish.
__________________ Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,467
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,542 hugs
given |
#787
Quote:
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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Anonymous41462, lightly toasted, Soupe du jour
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*Beth*, lightly toasted, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
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4 40.2k hugs
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#788
Testing.
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Silver Swan
Member Since Jan 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 16,467
(SuperPoster!)
16 2,542 hugs
given |
#789
__________________ Wellbutrin XL 300 mg Caplyta 42 mg Ingrezza 80 mg Ativan .5 mg 2x/day Propranolol 20 mg 2x/day Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Mania (April/May 2019) |
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bpcyclist
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bpcyclist
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
4 40.2k hugs
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#790
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
4 40.2k hugs
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#791
I flrgot to say how much I love and teasure all of you today. So. I love and treasure all of you. Yay !!
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, daladico, Fuzzybear, MuddyBoots, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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*Beth*, daladico, Fuzzybear, MuddyBoots, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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Elder
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Czechia
Posts: 5,153
8 13.4k hugs
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#792
Got to Pennsylvania to discover that they have much stricter covid rules again. I guess their numbers are way up. Worse than NJ, which is now less strict. I'm waiting in my car for Hubby. It could be well over an hour. I am not allowed to wait in their office waiting rooms, but can out near the elevator. I'd rather be in the chillier car with no mask than near the elevator with. Plus, some man is playing loud and lousy music on his phone that all near him are forced to hear. I'm sure he wouldn't like if I blasted heavy metal music, would he?
Last edited by Soupe du jour; Dec 02, 2020 at 02:10 PM.. |
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Anonymous41462, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Nammu, Sunflower123
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*Beth*, lightly toasted
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Monster on the Hill
Member Since Sep 2020
Location: by the river
Posts: 4,093
(SuperPoster!)
3 4,819 hugs
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#793
Demons... starting to get scared. Have so much to do but cannot get myself to do any of it.
__________________ If any chord that I could strum Make me feel less like a man I'd slam my fingers in the doorway And shatter all the bones So I could never strum again |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, bpcyclist, lightly toasted, Nammu, Sunflower123
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bpcyclist
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,113
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7 8,736 hugs
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#794
I’m not feeling good today. My stomach is off. My temp was 98.8. I know not a big deal but still kinda nervous about it. Not even gonna try to eat if I really can’t.
I was trying to diet but now it seems like I’m having no trouble doing it. Wouldn’t be the first time something ended up turning into something else. __________________ Ridin' with Biden Last edited by Mountaindewed; Dec 02, 2020 at 03:22 PM.. |
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*Beth*, Sunflower123
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Portland
Posts: 12,681
(SuperPoster!)
4 40.2k hugs
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#795
__________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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*Beth*, Sunflower123
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Guest
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#796
Well, today it happened. That day I’ve always dreaded... that moment where your past bites you in the ***. I am literally pretty shaken up about it and very upset. I just feel defeated and unable to come back from it. In an attempt to just feel better about life I’ve been trying to use outlets to get to know new people. I’m been part of a language learning community for a long time. A nice guy from the UK started talking to me about his interests in Latin. Our conversations have been really fun and I have enjoyed becoming his friend. In the process, I’ve let my full name be known to him. Long story short, he decided to google search me and found where I ruined my life in 2017 with a DUI. I went into a panic and began to cry. Firstly, I was under a false sense of security because literally a few weeks ago I did a search and didn’t find anything, so I thought it was pretty well buried. Secondly, I was angry. I know it’s just how people are – but that is a conversation I have not even had with family members, let alone strangers. It was a very traumatic event that led to so much of my life crumbling around me. That should have been my story to tell when I was ready to let it be known, not his to find out by other means than me. I know that’s not how life works, but it still hurts.
He was , understanding? His actual part in this is mainly irrelevant due to the extreme pain I feel by the scenario. I feel I can’t even let people know my last name without fear. I feel ashamed and upset. It was a mistake I made and I’ll never have it behind me. I still haven’t taught since, I lost my apartment, my spouse, everything. I can’t even stand to look myself in the mirror—why would I ever believe someone could be my friend, let alone love me one day? I mean it just made me realize there is nothing “marketable” about me. Any glimmer of coming out on top is gone. The innocent, intellectual, fun conversations are now over. Why couldn’t he have found my billions of awards and accomplishments from college, or my teaching career. Why that? I mean I have erased every aspect of that incident from my life. I burned the clothes I wore the night of the incident, I don’t drive down that road unless mandatory, I won’t even get in that car model if I don’t have to. I don’t want to remember and I don’t want to be judged by strangers. He apologized and said he thought it would be some silly, funny, dumb joke like story about a wild night. … yeah, sadly, it isn’t. If I ever felt like giving up, today is it. Maybe I should just wear a sign that says “I suffered child abuse, witnessed horrific things, got a DUI, am Bipolar and have low self esteem” and save everyone the trouble of wondering. Damn. Last edited by Anonymous328112; Dec 02, 2020 at 04:48 PM.. |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, BeyondtheRainbow, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Nammu, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 36,719
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10 14.3k hugs
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#797
I got my Christmas shopping done today. All through Amazon. I hope everyone likes their gifts.
It snowed today, I was walking back in it from CVS and it looked like a blizzard. I almost got hit by a car on my way walking home. That was a very scary moment. It missed me by like an inch. I feel like God was with me in that moment, I'm very lucky. Had a phone appointment with my psychiatrist today. I'm doing well so didn't need any changes in meds. She said she feels disconnected from patients when doing phone appointments. I kind of feel that way sometimes too. But it's okay, I know it's important that they limit the amount of people coming into the clinic. I'm just glad there's a way to have appointments at all. I have an appointment tomorrow with my new primary care doctor. It's in person, but that's only because it's my first appointment with him. __________________ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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*Beth*, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Nammu, Sunflower123
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catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
4 23.7k hugs
given |
#798
Quote:
Yikes - I'm glad you avoided the car! How scary. I think almost everyone feels disturbed & disconnected about the phone/video mental health appointments and sessions. It will be amazing when we can go back to f2f. __________________ |
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Blue_Bird
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Blue_Bird
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,543
(SuperPoster!)
9 95k hugs
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#799
I have had an amazing day that will end with a delicious dinner and a delightful Zoom meeting. I’m feeling much better. I love days that flow. I wish I had more control over that. I’m not foolish enough to think everything is hunky dory but I’ll gladly take the reprieve. Hallelujah! A few good days in a row.
Warm regards to all. |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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*Beth*, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Soupe du jour
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Wise Elder
Member Since Apr 2015
Location: US
Posts: 9,226
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9 9,383 hugs
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#800
My family member who is dying has been in the hospital for a week. He is going to be admitted to hospice in the morning and will come home as soon as they are set up for him. It isn't likely to be very long before he isn't with us. I've known this would be hard but I've been focusing on the place we've been in, not where we'd be going. It's time to look at the place we're going. It's so hard.
__________________ Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1700 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 1.5 mg clonazepam., 50 mg Seroquel |
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*Beth*, Anonymous41462, Innerzone, lightly toasted, Nammu, Polibeth, Soupe du jour, Victoria'smom
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