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Old 11-21-2020, 04:30 PM   #401
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

I'm just done, I don't want to fight anymore, not with ED, not with bp, not with psychosis. I'm just done I want to just sit down and cry but I can't. How can I think it was okay to pass this on. My H made a comment about one of my psychotic episodes. I'll I want to do is purge. get my meds out of my system. It's just a really bad head space day for me.
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Old 11-21-2020, 05:56 PM   #402
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

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Originally Posted by BethRags View Post
Soupe, the information on tea is so interesting. No way can I drink tea without milk or cream in it. With all the supposed health benefits of green tea, I thought (some years ago) I'd start drinking it. Well, excuse me for being yucky, but the first time I drank it I felt so nauseous that I threw it up. Thought it was a fluke, so I drank it again some days later. Same reaction. Apparently green tea is not my thing.

The combination of tannin and caffeine in all teas (except pure herbal) is, in my opinion, not a terrific combo.
Oh wow I never heard of anyone else experiencing this with green tea! I drank a cup once and went to my college classes and ended up throwing up in the bathroom. Thought I was just feeling off that day, so a few days later I drank some more and same thing. Then I took a diet supplement with green tea extract...same result. I have since determined green tea is just not for me!
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Old 11-21-2020, 06:43 PM   #403
Jennifer 1967
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

Well, I did end up cracking and my mental health and confidence took big hits. Thatís unfortunate because I need to be strong mentally going into winter. My confidence took a hit because my daughter pointed out a limiting belief I have that if I just try harder or work harder, I can do it all. To release that belief terrified me. I canít work hard enough to make it magically ok. That shook me.

After this dark night of the soul, I believe I will come out stronger, with more realistic expectations, more confidence and a modicum of peace. Itís just making it through the discomfort and terror.

Hugs to all.
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Old 11-21-2020, 07:01 PM   #404
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

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Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25 View Post
Oh wow I never heard of anyone else experiencing this with green tea! I drank a cup once and went to my college classes and ended up throwing up in the bathroom. Thought I was just feeling off that day, so a few days later I drank some more and same thing. Then I took a diet supplement with green tea extract...same result. I have since determined green tea is just not for me!

Yep, and we're not alone. I worked in a cafe for 15 years and when the green tea craze hit so many people were buying green teas. Every now and then someone would tell me they'd gotten sick from the tea. Apparently there's something in it that just doesn't sit well with some of us. Weird, huh?!
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Old 11-21-2020, 07:03 PM   #405
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

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Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967 View Post
Well, I did end up cracking and my mental health and confidence took big hits. Thatís unfortunate because I need to be strong mentally going into winter. My confidence took a hit because my daughter pointed out a limiting belief I have that if I just try harder or work harder, I can do it all. To release that belief terrified me. I canít work hard enough to make it magically ok. That shook me.

After this dark night of the soul, I believe I will come out stronger, with more realistic expectations, more confidence and a modicum of peace. Itís just making it through the discomfort and terror.

Hugs to all.

That's a big realization, Jennifer!
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Old 11-21-2020, 07:48 PM   #406
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

This is not my week. Tonight is one of the nights I take care of "Mark", my dying family member, and part of that is walking his dog. I was doing that when I fell and sprained an ankle I've had major surgery on because prior sprains had done so much damage to tendons and ligaments and my opposite kneecap is black and blue and hurts more than the sprain.
The dog was so good and didn't run and was patient as we limped home very slowly. I need to get her a treat.

I'm finally home after a painful drive home (pushing on the gas with the bruised knee hurt a lot) and I have my ankle in the boot I wore after my surgery. I'm glad I kept it. I need to get ice on but I'm resting before I get up and move around more.

Tomorrow I"ll go to urgent care for xrays. I may need to go back to the ortho who did my ankle surgery but that's a scary prospect as the surgery was intense and recovery included 6 weeks of reclined bed rest, 10 weeks in casts, 12 weeks in the boot, 12 weeks in a brace and 24 weeks of PT. I don't want to ever do that again.

This is just not my week. I've spent days waiting for resolution on the breast abnormalities/need for the breast surgeon appointment and now I've made my one favorite thing a day, walking the dogs, impossible for some time. And I'm fairly sure I've added PT to my unwanted medical bills. AND I have to go to urgent care which is undoubtedly germy.

This just feels unreal.
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Old 11-21-2020, 08:42 PM   #407
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

Quote:
Originally Posted by Miguel'smom View Post
I'm just done, I don't want to fight anymore, not with ED, not with bp, not with psychosis. I'm just done I want to just sit down and cry but I can't. How can I think it was okay to pass this on. My H made a comment about one of my psychotic episodes. I'll I want to do is purge. get my meds out of my system. It's just a really bad head space day for me.
What happened. Hugs and limitless love. What should we do for you?
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Old 11-21-2020, 08:46 PM   #408
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967 View Post
Well, I did end up cracking and my mental health and confidence took big hits. Thatís unfortunate because I need to be strong mentally going into winter. My confidence took a hit because my daughter pointed out a limiting belief I have that if I just try harder or work harder, I can do it all. To release that belief terrified me. I canít work hard enough to make it magically ok. That shook me.

After this dark night of the soul, I believe I will come out stronger, with more realistic expectations, more confidence and a modicum of peace. Itís just making it through the discomfort and terror.

Hugs to all.
Have hope. This is exactly why He gave it to us. Hope
You will push through this, Jennifer. I believe in you!!!!
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Old 11-21-2020, 08:51 PM   #409
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

Think I am gonna buy the house I rode by today. In the hills. Killer mountain and city views. Stunning. Ptetty sure I have decided to just wire them the cash and be done with all these real estate people hassling me all the time. Yay! Done!
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Old 11-21-2020, 09:44 PM   #410
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Default Re: Bipolar Check-In Thread #52

Quote:
Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow View Post
This is not my week. Tonight is one of the nights I take care of "Mark", my dying family member, and part of that is walking his dog. I was doing that when I fell and sprained an ankle I've had major surgery on because prior sprains had done so much damage to tendons and ligaments and my opposite kneecap is black and blue and hurts more than the sprain.
The dog was so good and didn't run and was patient as we limped home very slowly. I need to get her a treat.

I'm finally home after a painful drive home (pushing on the gas with the bruised knee hurt a lot) and I have my ankle in the boot I wore after my surgery. I'm glad I kept it. I need to get ice on but I'm resting before I get up and move around more.

Tomorrow I"ll go to urgent care for xrays. I may need to go back to the ortho who did my ankle surgery but that's a scary prospect as the surgery was intense and recovery included 6 weeks of reclined bed rest, 10 weeks in casts, 12 weeks in the boot, 12 weeks in a brace and 24 weeks of PT. I don't want to ever do that again.

This is just not my week. I've spent days waiting for resolution on the breast abnormalities/need for the breast surgeon appointment and now I've made my one favorite thing a day, walking the dogs, impossible for some time. And I'm fairly sure I've added PT to my unwanted medical bills. AND I have to go to urgent care which is undoubtedly germy.

This just feels unreal.

Oh, Rainbow. I feel so bad that you fell and that this week is being so harsh for you. Falling is so scary and dangerous. I hope you heal quickly and entirely.

I'm sending you love and a big .
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And the wind did howl
and the wind did moan
La la la la la
La la la la lee
A little bird lit down on Henry Lee

-Nick Cave & P.J. Harvey
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