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Old 07-04-2019, 10:27 PM   #1
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sadveiledbride fear and loathing
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How to title this post? I think I'm being shut up. Like I'm being smothered. Do opinions and feelings really matter if you're just going to be shut up by people in authority above you? Doesn't seem like it, like feelings, thoughts, and opinions matter. And I wasn't sure which forum to post in. Because you could easily blame my irritation and anger at the world as being "inappropriate" like most assholes do who have no ******* idea what living with a personality disorder is like. So, yeah, I'm angry. It's not inappropriate, I'm not doing any ******* thing wrong. Just expressing my opinion on things. Nothing wrong with that, lol.

People act like you need to be thrown in a padded room when you don't follow the brainwashing chemicals the world throws on you as a supposed defense mechanism. Well, **** off. I'm allowed to say what's on my mind. I don't need a ******* padded room or validation from someone who wants an excuse to look past their own problems. I'm allowed to write my own posts.

Bowing down to the vicinity of people who are "better" than you and have the power above you is something I'm no longer doing, I'm my own person. Defensive is what I may be, but for a good reason.

Writing posts and threads here can be good, except living in fear of having them taken down or being banned is just sort of out of the way. I'm not doing anything wrong, but of course, everyone delusional person as you may call them thinks there is nothing wrong with what they're putting on here. No nudity, violence, "obsessive talk on god or religion" is happening in this post. Don't worry about me, I'm fine.

Just another angry borderline here... of course, it's easier for you to see me as a screwed up POS instead of taking into account what I'm saying. I'm not forcing this on you. But you choose to read it, if you don't like it, fine.

But in the end, I am an angry borderline, aren't I? It's easier for you to put me in a box. "Don't move! You might spill your thoughts and feelings into the outside world where no one wants to hear them!" You put me in a square box with tape and tell me not to move. Well, I chose not to drink or conceal your acid, I'm my own person.

Stay away! is a defense mechanism. It would be easy for you to say that -- and stigmatize me once more. I hate boxes. Complaining won't get me anywhere, will it? You think I really like to moan and groan like I have no life. Easy for you to think that huh? All in all, I do ****ing pity myself, and others. Too bad, too bad. I feel my thoughts going every which way and it seems like I won't ever come down.

Well... easy for you to put me into a box... "inappropriate rage. mood swings." as if you're a ******* professional. Don't tell me what I am. I know what I am, I don't need your help. Stop slapping me around. I used to follow stupid ideas, and believe stupid ****, but no more. I will not be brainwashed or silenced, nor will I be smothered into a box. I am not sorry.
"I desire the things that will destroy me in the end."
-- Sylvia Plath

"You got to kill the person you were born to be in order to become the person you want to be."
-- Rocketman, 2019

Last edited by sadveiledbride; 07-04-2019 at 10:58 PM..
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Old 07-04-2019, 10:55 PM   #2
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Sorry to hear of your suffering. I think your post is valid and fine. I believe you that your anger is justified. Hugs if you want them.
"I think I'm a hypochondriac. I sure hope so, otherwise I'm just about to die."

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Old 07-11-2019, 10:42 PM   #3
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