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Capac
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Default Nov 26, 2019 at 03:24 AM
  #1
My best friend (favorite person), ended our friendship. She blocked me from all contact with her. I can imagine being friends with someone like me who is so unstable, is not easy. My borderline personality is brutal to deal with and very hard to treat. I am so emotionally unstable; anxiety, depression, trauma, fear. I might have subconsciously pushed her away. She was my best and only friend, true friend. I cared about her so much. I confided in her, trusted her, depended on her; I should have known better than that, but I couldn’t help myself.

She would make me feel good, compliment me, talk to me, made me feel less lonely, made me feel loved. It feels like the walls have just caved in. I can’t imagine what my life is going to be like now without my best friend. I’ll never be able to talk to her again, never be able to see her, never get any messages from her. I’m gonna miss her so much, and I wish her kids the best, I cared about them as well.

My mental health is worsening and I fear that it will never get better. At this point I am treatment resistant. I seem to be getting worse and worse. I don’t know how to go on, or what to do. I feel hopeless, scared, abandoned, and rejected; like I am beyond help. Not worthy of help or improvement.
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Default Nov 26, 2019 at 07:33 AM
  #2
these things can be brutal, and yes: when someone you like blocks you like that, it is normal to feel that way. i had 2 friends like that, both times I felt like you did. one of them, laura, I think about all the time.. we were very close but she blocked me because of religious diffrences.

I'm here if you want to talk about it,. their will be other friends you make, who knows, some just as good as the person who blocked you

maybe you'll find some people here who you can talk to.

(((hugs))))
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Default Nov 26, 2019 at 09:33 PM
  #3
I also think its normal to feel that way if a good friend blocks you, seemingly out of nowhere. Although it doesn't feel like it, there will be other good friends out there for you

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Crypts_Of_The_Mind
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Default Nov 27, 2019 at 02:54 AM
  #4
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Originally Posted by Capac View Post
My best friend (favorite person), ended our friendship. She blocked me from all contact with her. I can imagine being friends with someone like me who is so unstable, is not easy. My borderline personality is brutal to deal with and very hard to treat. I am so emotionally unstable; anxiety, depression, trauma, fear. I might have subconsciously pushed her away. She was my best and only friend, true friend. I cared about her so much. I confided in her, trusted her, depended on her; I should have known better than that, but I couldn’t help myself.

She would make me feel good, compliment me, talk to me, made me feel less lonely, made me feel loved. It feels like the walls have just caved in. I can’t imagine what my life is going to be like now without my best friend. I’ll never be able to talk to her again, never be able to see her, never get any messages from her. I’m gonna miss her so much, and I wish her kids the best, I cared about them as well.

My mental health is worsening and I fear that it will never get better. At this point I am treatment resistant. I seem to be getting worse and worse. I don’t know how to go on, or what to do. I feel hopeless, scared, abandoned, and rejected; like I am beyond help. Not worthy of help or improvement.
Any kind of relationship end will bring up feelings of abandonment and self-blame. Just understand, it is a passing phase - just that we experience it deeper n sometimes longer. Try to get out n do things, or at least distract yourself. Dont focus on what you no longer have - but what you do have or could have in the future. Set goals n work toward them. Celebrate each accomplishment- no matter how small.

As far as "treatment resistant" BPD- have you tried any natural cures (as opposed to medications)?

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Default Nov 27, 2019 at 04:36 AM
  #5
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Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind View Post
Any kind of relationship end will bring up feelings of abandonment and self-blame. Just understand, it is a passing phase - just that we experience it deeper n sometimes longer. Try to get out n do things, or at least distract yourself. Dont focus on what you no longer have - but what you do have or could have in the future. Set goals n work toward them. Celebrate each accomplishment- no matter how small.

As far as "treatment resistant" BPD- have you tried any natural cures (as opposed to medications)?
Thanks. Yes, cognitive behavioral therapy and dialectal behavioral therapy do help a bit.
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Default Nov 27, 2019 at 10:49 AM
  #6
I am glad therapy is helping you

What I meant by natural cures was things like essential oils, changing your diet, exercise, yoga, etc?

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Default Dec 02, 2019 at 06:50 PM
  #7
I understand and am there with you. I can't imagine life without my best friend. All I can say hang in there.

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