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Default Dec 01, 2018 at 08:21 PM
  #1
amazing concept!

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Default Dec 01, 2018 at 08:35 PM
  #2
That was great. Sign me up!

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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 04:52 AM
  #3
hahaha that's awesome!
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 05:21 AM
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 12:48 PM
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i read an article last night on this rental family trend in japan and a lot of it is about hiring people to act as wedding dates, fake family members to deceive others so i am not crazy about that part but the part, like in conan's bit, where we can hire people to change our personal histories for the better, to have people who should apologize to us, apologize to us, well, if it has lasting effects then that would be great. we wouldn't need therapy anymore! and there is that part about using it to alleviate loneliness. that would be wonderful too. i had thought that paying someone for companionship might not feel genuine but it has worked for people. it is pricey though so not everyone would be able to afford to try this.

i have to add i have been changing my own personal history. i have been giving to myself what i didn't get in childhood and i must say it has been working for me so far. i look in the mirror and pretend i am my mom etc and i say to myself stuff i wanted to hear when i was growing up. it really has been life-changing. and it's free! so if you have a void to fill or fix, give self-parenting a try!
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 02:26 PM
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There is a rent a friend service in the USA. I guess this would be helpful for some things, such as having someone for support and companionship, especially during stressful situations that one does not want to go through alone. However, I much rather have a real friend who is with me because he/she genuinely likes me and wants to spend time with me.

Renting a friend may be a "better than having nobody" option for some of us, but certainly not the preference.

Sadly though, it seems like the deeper I move into senior citizen status, the less likely that anyone under the age of 50 would befriend me without there being a price or conditions attached to it. Older people are treated like obsolete relics in this society, or it seems that way at times.

By the way, in my opinion, the rent a family concept would not help to heal old traumas that happened with other people in the past. One would always know that the hired family was only playing a role. It would be like taking a placebo pill, but knowing that it is a placebo. There would be little or no effect.
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 02:30 PM
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Wow! So family issues and loneliness are really, really prevalent thing... often I feel isolated, like I’m the only one... I wonder why it’s so hard for people to just be kind to their own family.
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 03:22 PM
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Originally Posted by NightNotes View Post
There is a rent a friend service in the USA. I guess this would be helpful for some things, such as having someone for support and companionship, especially during stressful situations that one does not want to go through alone. However, I much rather have a real friend who is with me because he/she genuinely likes me and wants to spend time with me.

Renting a friend may be a "better than having nobody" option for some of us, but certainly not the preference.

Sadly though, it seems like the deeper I move into senior citizen status, the less likely that anyone under the age of 50 would befriend me without there being a price or conditions attached to it. Older people are treated like obsolete relics in this society, or it seems that way at times.

By the way, in my opinion, the rent a family concept would not help to heal old traumas that happened with other people in the past. One would always know that the hired family was only playing a role. It would be like taking a placebo pill, but knowing that it is a placebo. There would be little or no effect.
in the article i read, some rentees began to really bond with their renters but i understand what you are saying about things not always being genuine. but maybe some of the actors are also in the biz because they like helping others. who knows? i do prefer the self-parenting in terms of healing old issues.

as for making friends at an older age, i am a senior too and most seniors where i am have family so yes they are not actively looking for friends but i have met people of all ages at work, or who work near me, at the bus stop, all who seemed to be looking for friends. i spent many years being depressed and lost some friends along the way but now that i feel better i am determined to make up for lost time. i am going to try to be more open to making friends. of course it also depends on having similar interests and being compatible, an ageless search for anyone. but all we can do is try. good luck to you!

i forgot to add one thing that has helped me be more open is the fact that i suffered with invisible emotional pain for so many years that i have become more empathetic and i reach out to others more now because who knows what emotional pain someone might be in?

Last edited by TerryL; Dec 02, 2018 at 03:52 PM..
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 03:42 PM
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Originally Posted by Sisabel View Post
Wow! So family issues and loneliness are really, really prevalent thing... often I feel isolated, like I’m the only one... I wonder why it’s so hard for people to just be kind to their own family.
(((you are not alone))) family issues and loneliness are very common.
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 04:12 PM
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as for making friends at an older age, i am a senior too and most seniors where i am have family so yes they are not actively looking for friends but i have met people of all ages at work, or who work near me, at the bus stop, all who seemed to be looking for friends. i spent many years being depressed and lost some friends along the way but now that i feel better i am determined to make up for lost time. i am going to try to be more open to making friends. of course it also depends on having similar interests and being compatible, an ageless search for anyone. but all we can do is try. good luck to you!

i forgot to add one thing that has helped me be more open is the fact that i suffered with invisible emotional pain for so many years that i have become more empathetic and i reach out to others more now because who knows what emotional pain someone might be in?
The personality of someone makes a big difference regarding the ease in making new friendships. I have an introverted, withdrawn personality, and so making new friends has never been easy. My age has made it even more difficult, since I'm noticing that less people will initially reach out to me, leaving it up to me to do the reaching out, which I'm not good at. And, for whatever reason, I'm finding that even less people seem interested in getting to know me at my age, which is not too old, but old enough that I've seemed to have crossed into a more isolated world now. Or, maybe it is just something else that has changed about me. I don't really know.

Once I make a friend, I'm very loyal, compassionate, supportive and a good listener. But getting into an actual friendship is the difficult part. I'm not friendless or anything like that, but it would be nice to have more friends. This is my life though. My personality is that of a loner, and I don't see that ever changing, especially now. I am headed into increasing isolation it seems.
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Default Dec 02, 2018 at 04:14 PM
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thanks for sharing this.

it is a nice idea

and diffrent
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Default Dec 08, 2018 at 07:20 PM
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Well we live in a society where people would pay somebody $60-100 per hour to hire somebody to cuddle with them so there being a market to rent families isn't surprising at this point.

It's pretty sad that such services are needed. That being said, I would gladly buy a family or pay a woman to cuddle with me if I could afford it since I can't get my needs met any other way.
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Default Dec 09, 2018 at 07:03 AM
  #13
Sending hugs to everyone who's feeling lonely
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Default Dec 11, 2018 at 02:10 PM
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Well we live in a society where people would pay somebody $60-100 per hour to hire somebody to cuddle with them so there being a market to rent families isn't surprising at this point.

It's pretty sad that such services are needed. That being said, I would gladly buy a family or pay a woman to cuddle with me if I could afford it since I can't get my needs met any other way.
The rent-a-hug service starts at $10.00 per hour. What a bargain! Wonder if they give out coupons once in a while? I'm being sarcastic, but if $20.00 gave me 2 hours worth of hugs, it would be very tempting. Although, knowing me, I don't think it would feel good to me, since it would not feel genuine to me, regardless of the provider's intentions.

The motivation and intention behind a hug is what matters to me, and this is something I can feel. There is a big difference between an obligatory hug and a heartfelt/compassionate hug.
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Default Dec 11, 2018 at 02:18 PM
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The rent-a-hug service starts at $10.00 per hour. What a bargain! Wonder if they give out coupons once in a while? I'm being sarcastic, but if $20.00 gave me 2 hours worth of hugs, it would be very tempting. Although, knowing me, I don't think it would feel good to me, since it would not feel genuine to me, regardless of the provider's intentions.

The motivation and intention behind a hug is what matters to me, and this is something I can feel. There is a big difference between an obligatory hug and a heartfelt/compassionate hug.

What is a "genuine" hug though? I don't think such a thing exists.

According to my experience, even a significant other hugging or cuddling with you typically does so with a hidden motive. Said motive could be wanting a favor or to make up for an argument or another reason entirely.

At least hiring somebody to fill your needs is predictable and gives you a degree of control. If the person judges you than you can simply fire them and move on. If a SO judges you than you can't do anything about it except argue with them or leave them which only opens you up to being hurt further.

Sorry, I just don't believe that unconditional love exists. The only being that can come close to loving a human unconditionally is a dog.

So yeah, as soon as I can afford to, I plan on hiring a professional cuddler quite liberally. I should be able to make decent enough money within the next year if I don't screw anything else up so when that happens, I'll gladly pay an extra several hundred or more dollars a month to have my needs met in a way that doesn't put me at risk of being hurt further.
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Default Dec 30, 2018 at 05:24 PM
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The rent-a-hug service starts at $10.00 per hour. What a bargain! Wonder if they give out coupons once in a while? I'm being sarcastic, but if $20.00 gave me 2 hours worth of hugs, it would be very tempting. Although, knowing me, I don't think it would feel good to me, since it would not feel genuine to me, regardless of the provider's intentions.

The motivation and intention behind a hug is what matters to me, and this is something I can feel. There is a big difference between an obligatory hug and a heartfelt/compassionate hug.
i wonder if the huggers do this out of compassion for others? and might that help one get over the feeling that it isn't genuine? if one is hurting and there is no relief, it might help a little. that being said, a therapist i once saw used to offer hugs after each session. but it did seem a little obligatory to me.
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Default Dec 30, 2018 at 05:31 PM
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What is a "genuine" hug though? I don't think such a thing exists.

According to my experience, even a significant other hugging or cuddling with you typically does so with a hidden motive. Said motive could be wanting a favor or to make up for an argument or another reason entirely.

At least hiring somebody to fill your needs is predictable and gives you a degree of control. If the person judges you than you can simply fire them and move on. If a SO judges you than you can't do anything about it except argue with them or leave them which only opens you up to being hurt further.

Sorry, I just don't believe that unconditional love exists. The only being that can come close to loving a human unconditionally is a dog.

So yeah, as soon as I can afford to, I plan on hiring a professional cuddler quite liberally. I should be able to make decent enough money within the next year if I don't screw anything else up so when that happens, I'll gladly pay an extra several hundred or more dollars a month to have my needs met in a way that doesn't put me at risk of being hurt further.
i hope that you will feel a genuine hug one day. i tend to give them when i meet someone who has suffered a loss because i have been there and can feel their pain.
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Default Mar 26, 2019 at 07:30 PM
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