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Fuzzybear
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Default Feb 18, 2020 at 11:50 AM
  #1
One of the reasons I have always liked this forum is that some members (maybe many members) sometimes take a moment to read a post from someone who is in distress (not necessarily in crisis) and send a virtual hug, whether this is a posted hug, a row of supportive emojis or a clicked hug. Even if the person does not have advice or information to offer - which is not the sole purpose of this support forum - they still try to send some support. Sometimes (to me anyway) this makes a real difference. So I guess I am saying, to everyone here who tries to be supportive (and I think that is everyone) .. even if you don’t know what to say to a person, or even if you are afraid of upsetting them for some reason (yes misunderstandings etc do occasionally happen on every online forum, as they do in every group of people I have ever engaged with offline... sometimes a hug can go a long way to offer a little bit of support, or maybe even an olive branch (many many years ago I had a minor falling out with a long term online friend/contact. It was a misunderstanding or miscommunication. I do not think either of us were at “fault” ... I sent her a friendly PM. I felt some anxiety ... I did not know how she would react. She sent me a lovely PM back thanking me for the “olive branch”.

I think everyone here is learning and growing. I usually do not close my cave door to people, especially not permanently. I personally do not find that is usually healthy although occasionally it is necessary (especially short term and yes even very occasionally longer term) - as in “real life” I have had to cut a few people out of my life. I never make that decision easily or on impulse. yes occasionally I can be impulsive (not one of my better traits and I try not to be) .. anyway this is a long ramble. I hope someone (anyone) reading this gets something from it and anyone is free to comment.

(I have not spent a very long time writing this post so I apologise for any errors or less than clear points I may have made.)

Respect to all and hugs if accepted

ETA I haven’t been in chat for a long time. I had thought of making a separate post saying thanks to everyone in chat who have always been welcoming to me. That still stands, I hope I’ll be able to chat again soon. I have also found in chat I can say things more easily sometimes without the sometimes long wait, a back and forth conversation is sometimes more healthy for me. I sometimes feel quite exposed making long posts and then waiting... but I think for me it’s healthy sometimes to at least try to express some of what is on my mind, hopefully at least sometimes in a positive or productive way. now I’m tired having written all this standing up on my iPad, I need to move around more. Sorry about the long post.

ETA - re my point about very occasionally having to “cut” someone out of my life, this has usually been someone I trusted too soon and gave my email to and it didn’t “work out”... I try to be more guarded these days and be sure I trust someone before I give an email out. (and for me “trusting someone” enough for that would usually take at least a year)

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Default Feb 18, 2020 at 12:25 PM
  #2
I certainly appreciate what you wrote and everything you do here on the Forums, Fuzzybear. Your hula dancing bear emoji always puts a smile on my face. -Yaowen
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Default Feb 19, 2020 at 01:55 AM
  #3
Very well said fuzzy.
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Default Feb 19, 2020 at 11:04 PM
  #4
(((((( fuzzybear ))))))

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Default Feb 20, 2020 at 03:24 AM
  #5
I use Tapatalk and hug isnt an option but Thanks is so I use that

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Heart Feb 20, 2020 at 05:17 PM
  #6
Dear Fuzzybear, thank you so much for reminding us how even a hug online can mean so much. There were no hugs when I was growing up, except for my 3rd grade teacher, who taught me how to read. One of the things I love about PC is the way we are able to hug each other, almost for real. I really do feel love here. Thank you, Fuzzybear, & everyone who makes that happen. I feel we are very lucky here. God bless you, dear Fuzzybear & others like you. If you only knew how important you are!!
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Default Feb 21, 2020 at 05:14 AM
  #7
Dear Fuzzybear thank you for this lovely topic. I love you, buddy.

My daughter says "Hugs are healing", and she is very right.

Every morning in our kitchen when we come down from waking, we hug one another. Hugging bonds my family. No day has ever passed without a hug.

Some time ago I watched a video called Free Hugs London. Which says it all.

YouTube

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Default Feb 21, 2020 at 09:05 AM
  #8
Thanks, Fuzzybear! I like to give and receive the hugs, too. It's true that I don't always know what to say in reply to all posts, but I do my best to read as many posts, as possible.
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Default Feb 27, 2020 at 10:39 AM
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Default Mar 06, 2020 at 02:06 AM
  #10
You are so right dearest fuzzy one. Picture hugs can really touch a person when things are not going okay. I know that you have brought solace to many including me when you pop out of your cave.

I think a hug can go a long way
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Default Mar 06, 2020 at 07:51 PM
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Default Mar 07, 2020 at 12:29 PM
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I think a hug can go a long way

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Default Mar 09, 2020 at 07:48 AM
  #13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fuzzybear View Post
ETA - re my point about very occasionally having to “cut” someone out of my life, this has usually been someone I trusted too soon and gave my email to and it didn’t “work out”... I try to be more guarded these days and be sure I trust someone before I give an email out. (and for me “trusting someone” enough for that would usually take at least a year)
I can relate to this.. very much so. I have given my email out too soon, and I trusted someone too quickly, only to be burned in the end and only to have to cut off the newly budding friendship. It's an awful situation to put oneself in. I just learned a valuable lesson the hard way.

And yes, hugs can go a very long way. I appreciate every one of them.


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