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Old 10-04-2018, 08:01 AM #1
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Heart Fingers Crossed

After having had a confrontation and being very hurt by a family member, ending with me having a meltdown and depression that has lasted nearly a week now, I just gave my immediate family a group text. In it I explained what I need from them, which is a show of empathy and protection or an explaination of why I am underserving of it. They responded they would abide moving forward. Hereís hoping should I fall into it again, they will have my back and actually show they care. I donít even care if they fake it. Let them just give me some support in hopes of controlling this emotional disorder. Is it possible simple, honest communication can get my needs met?

Please no negative feedback from anyone, only support if you wish to comment at all.
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Old 10-04-2018, 12:38 PM #2
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

Thereís always a possibility, hereís hoping 🤞🏻 My core family couldnít understand my illness at first but after years seeing me suffering and witnessing my fight against it, they became my biggest supporters now. Sending hugs
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Old 10-04-2018, 01:44 PM #3
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Sending hugs
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Old 10-07-2018, 09:47 PM #4
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

Kudos to you for being able to be open and honest with them about your needs. I hope all goes well and you're able to get the support you need.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:16 PM #5
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

I think putting the emphasis on supporting each other as a thing that family members do is a great idea.
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Old 10-09-2018, 11:56 AM #6
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Heart Re: Fingers Crossed

I think it's a great idea to send a message to your family, outlining your needs.

I hope things start looking up soon!


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Old 10-16-2018, 04:44 PM #7
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

My asking for what I need, once again, did not work. They wonít even fake empathy. More tears, every night now. Iím not going to be satisfied until I push everybody away.
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Old 10-16-2018, 07:21 PM #8
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

Tonight was a little better. He was open and supportive. I apologized for reeling over the family rift as I have. My mood is swinging like crazy. Iím wearing myself out. Itís getting better each day.
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Old 10-25-2018, 10:22 PM #9
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Great job! really brave of you being assertive about your needs. I hope they'll be understanding
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Old 10-31-2018, 09:14 AM #10
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Default Re: Fingers Crossed

Iíve come through the horrible family rift in my own mind and am feeling better. I was the only one who made the effort to make peace. Thatís how itís always been. I say Ďin my own mindí because the act of my niece refriending me and my calling my mother and acting like nothing happened gives me a sense of relief from the extreme depression I suffered this past month over this.

As far as the actual family rift, it is what it is. They truly have no empathy for me. Over something as stupid as a difference of political opinion, they want nothing to do with me. They really did Ďdisowní me and never called me again. They didnít call for a month, and I doubt they ever would. My mother, dad, and sister truly wrote me off over nothing. Thatís how little I mean to them.

My kids were told of what happened because I want their empathy and for them to see the family as they truly are. I have no issues with my kids.

My husband who has no empathy and no traits of Ďdefenderí took no actions to help until he had to hear me cry and ***** about it for a month, finally getting through to him about the effort he could have taken to help, which he finally did. So, yeah, I had to manipulate him. But, ultimately that eased my suffering because it got my niece to just refriend me and end this.

Itís unfathomable to me why my whole family didnít act the way I would think a family is supposed to act, to have said to my niece that unfriending her very emotionally unstable aunt over BS was a bad thing to do and just undo it. But, mine is a truly uncaring, mean family and thatís why they donít have my back. They really donít even like me. Thatís why.

So, Iím glad thatís over for my sake. I donít want to get into it with anyone over anything again. Iíll stay away.

It appears that we are at peace. But, really we are estranged. Iíll never forget this hurt.

From here on out, my immediate family will not need to show any empathy to me or defend me because Iíll stay away from conflict.
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