advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
researchtopractice
New Member
researchtopractice has no updates.
 
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: Rockville MD
Posts: 2
3 yr Member
Unhappy Sep 01, 2019 at 04:30 PM
  #1
Hello all,

I'm Liz and new here. I've suffered for at least two years, maybe longer.

My grandpa passed in 8/2017 and in 12/2017, my mother passed suddenly. I saw her die over the period of four days. She had COPD (lung disease) and suffocated to death. It was horrifying.

Months later was treated like a criminal by police, handcuffed and dragged to the hospital. they made me feel like a criminal, yelled at me to stop crying because it was hurting his ears, etc.

Then, was admitted to the hospital and had to go to inpatient. It was the worst experience of my life. they called us numbers, and the night staff mocked me for asking them to sharpen me pencil so I could write (since I couldn't sleep). The food was awful so I starved for a few days while I was there. the showers were awful and you have to put your belongings on the dirty, mold covered floor because there are no hooks or benches or anywhere to put it.


This severely complicated my PTSD. I have nightmares about this nearly every night, over a year later.

Now I have a chronic sleep problem (idiopathic hypersomnia, similar to narcolepsy). I get severe night sweats and horrible nightmares/lucid dreams. I hate being asleep, but also hate being awake.


I've tried so many meds and different kinds of therapy, including intensive outpatient, and TMS (twice). I'm just really apathetic now. At the point where I've stopped caring.

Left my job a month ago because I couldn't function, and boss didn't want me to take short term disability again. Now I'm trying to apply for real disability and it's so hard. so much to do. will be without insurance in one month. With the hypersomnia, I barely have energy for anything. With the depression, I don't care about the consequences of not doing things so I have no way to push through.

Man this sucks. Anyway, thanks for reading <3
researchtopractice is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Blueberry21, Open Eyes
 
Thanks for this!
Skeezyks

advertisement
Skeezyks
Disreputable Old Troll
 
Skeezyks's Avatar
Skeezyks has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
17.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Smile Sep 02, 2019 at 12:41 PM
  #2
Hello researchtopractice: Thank you for sharing your concern here on PC. I noticed this is your first posted thread here on PC. So... welcome to Psych Central.

I'm sorry you had such a dreadful inpatient experience. I've been inpatient twice and, although they weren't great experiences, they were certainly a lot better than what you describe.

You mentioned applying for disability. So one additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the Insurance & Finances forum. Here's a link:

https://psychcentralforums.com/insurance-and-finances/

And then here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help:

What is Complicated Grief? | Mental Health Awareness

Complicated Grief: How to Get Unstuck | Bonding Time

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) | Psych Central

Healthy Ways to Cope with PTSD

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
Skeezyks is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,093 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
21.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 02, 2019 at 03:44 PM
  #3
I am VERY sorry, both my parents passed away this year and it was so toxic that it really traumatized me. Often I hear statements like "ya just gotta get over it and move forward etc." yet I have been having a very hard time with the depth of grief I have been experiencing. I had already been struggling with PTSD so going through how toxic the last years of my parent's lives made it even that much harder. I have experienced a lot of night mares, and days where I do as little as possible and mostly just want to sleep due to being so deeply depressed and grief stricken.

Are you seeing a trauma therapist? Yes, I understand how hard it is when it comes to working or trying to even function and not really having enough money where you can just concentrate on mourning and trying to work your way through being so traumatized by the loss of a parent. In my case it was both my parents and it's only been a few months.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:04 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.