help me talk about my anxiety?

I went to an Understanding Anxiety course today. Only 7 people turned up though, which meant that the trainer focused on individuals a fair bit. I felt like I was back at school and didn't know what to say really a lot of the time.

I did realise that my anxiety is like a secret that I actually struggle to talk about. I know I've had years of therapy, and I did sort of talk about it there, and I understand a lot. But there's definitely this secretiveness about it for me, probably because of the way that I was brought up.

Can you help me talk about my anxiety?
Thanks.

It can be very anxiety provoking to talk about anxiety. Would it help if you wrote a description about it? Maybe start by describing colors surrounding your emotions. I’m no therapist. This idea just came to me as a suggestion for you to comfortably express yourself.

Thanks.
Well, it's foggy outside this morning, and that's kind of what my anxiety is like, grey and foggy. It sits there and it lingers and I can't see through it.

For me understanding my anxiety doesn't make it go away or any easier to manage.

Being triggered happens long before I can catch it. I am not very good at being aware of my feelings. I find it more helpful to keep a small life, cut out people who trigger me and focus on the nice things that happen. I guess I try and avoid anxiety until I have no choice and it grabs me, suffocates and terrorises me. In reality in is with me most of the time in varying degrees.

I have now got Panic disorder as a result of so much stress from the outside world. I have made friends with a paper bag to breathe in and out of. I wish there was an answer that would cure us.... I hope your course can help

Is your anxiety just a generalized feeling or is it triggered by specific life events?

I understand so much about my anxiety, I just find it hard to describe what it's like.
My anxiety can also terrorise me, so I can totally empathise with that.

So sorry that you've developed panics so intensely. I used to get pretty severe panic attacks too, though they've thankfully lessened over the years, partly because of therapy and partly because of meds.
But I know I'll live with anxiety for the rest of my life, since I started out life very anxious from birth and early attachment trauma, and everything else in my life from then on just added to it.

Thanks for your good wishes.

Both! I feel anxious and worried pretty much all the time to one degree or another. I worry about anything and everything.

But then I also get triggered, mostly by people looking at me, and I feel that they're staring at me and laughing at me, like all the girls who bullied/peer abused me at school did.

I also can't deal with anyone behind me, because of how they followed me and assaulted me back then.

I'm slightly better than I used to me in that I don't have major public meltdowns about it, but I am still very obviously anxious.

Sorry I just got back to you. You’re starting to talk. If you’re around keep going.