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Old 12-19-2018, 10:22 AM   #1
blue592
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Default Lonely

I have a week off of work next week for Christmas. At first I was really excited since I just moved to a new neighborhood and canít wait to explore it but now I all of the sudden feel nervous. Iím nervous about being lonely. Iíve been feeling very lonely lately and wanting to spend time with people I love, who donít have time for me. My best friend never has time for me. The man Iím in love with never has time for me. My mom never has time for me. All my other close friends live a long distance away. Yeah I could try and make friends but thatís hard, and it doesnít make me feel that feeling I want to feel. That feeling of being in the presence of people who understand you, who you trust, and who you can relax with because you know them so well and you know you can be yourself and you just love them. Itís different from hanging out with a person you donít know very well, which often makes me feel MORE lonely. I guess Iíll be spending yet another bunch of days all alone. Any tips for making the most of alone time? I honestly feel like Iím an expert at this at this point, but how do I get around the self-pity and all overall loneliness?
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Old 12-21-2018, 07:57 PM   #2
healingme4me
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Default Re: Lonely

I think being able to appreciate quality alone time involves releasing any and all resentment for being alone. You wrote that your best friend, boyfriend and mother aren't making time for you and I wonder if that will hold you back from enjoying finding things to do for yourself?

Being alone and being lonely are different, in my opinion. One can be in a roomful of familiar faces and still feel lonely. One can be alone and at peace and content without feeling lonely.

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Old 12-22-2018, 01:34 PM   #3
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Default Re: Lonely

Be fed up have a ceremony to let it go!! Own its way of being take a trade do something adventurous
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Old 12-22-2018, 02:28 PM   #4
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Default Re: Lonely

What does usually make you happy, blue592? It seems weird that your family and friends never have time for you, not even around Christmas. Perhaps this is something that's worth discussing with them? Either way, I think it's important to have some time to take care of ourselves. Try to enjoy it for what it is and not think too much about other people. Maybe read a book, watch a movie, or just try to relax as much as you can. If it can help a bit, we'll be here for you as well. I'm so sorry you're feeling lonely, please don't give up. I hope you'll feel better soon. Let us know how it goes. Happy Holidays! Sending many hugs to you
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Old 12-22-2018, 02:39 PM   #5
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Default Re: Lonely

Quote:
Originally Posted by blue592 View Post
I guess Iíll be spending yet another bunch of days all alone. Any tips for making the most of alone time? I honestly feel like Iím an expert at this at this point, but how do I get around the self-pity and all overall loneliness?
I can relate. I will have some time off next week. What bothers me is generally there is nothing to do. For instance lots of things are closed.

So here are my thoughts
- Movies? Netflix etc.
- You Tube?
- Post here of course
- Big project -- like organize your stuff.
- Try to cook something new.
- Hang out at the library / bookstore (assuming they are open)
- travel in a 1 day way.. go for a ride or ride the trains or something.
- day trip to a local city?
- home improvement projects? Paint a cabinet etc.
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Old 12-27-2018, 02:57 AM   #6
sarahsweets
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Default Re: Lonely

Its a tough spot for sure. Its one thing to tell someone to make friends but making friends doesnt automatically make you besties. And making friends isnt always the same as being friends.
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