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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 07:34 AM
  #1
This is one emotion that keeps coming back to me often. Of course I feel other things, too. I try to reason things out and to understand more and that seems to help. I sometimes wonder if I'm just an angry person. I've been diagnosed with 2 major serious diseases in the past year and heard this can cause emotional upheaval. I've come to accept the illnesses and am doing what I can to deal with them.

One thing I do is to challenge the Irrational Beliefs that send me into anger. Sometimes that makes the anger dissipate. Sometimes I just sit and stew, too.

Anyone else get angry a lot? What seems to cause it? Have any answers to deal with it?

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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 08:14 AM
  #2
I'm so sorry, LucyD I do get angry from time to time. I'm sure it happens to all of us. What matters is how we deal with it, and from what you wrote it sounds like you're doing a great job. So good for you! I've heard yoga and meditation are useful exercises for people who have troubled dealing with their own anger. Also, if you want to vent your frustration, perhaps you could try to buy a punching bag. Maybe that could help. I hope some of this advice will be helpful to you. Please don't give up. I hope you will feel better soon. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 09:14 AM
  #3
Yoga and meditation sound good. I will try them when my motivation comes back. I'm not giving up without a good fight...lol... Thank you.

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Smile Jan 23, 2019 at 03:16 PM
  #4
Anger is something I've always struggled with. I'm angry most of the time at myself as well as with everything & everyone around me. And now that I'm aging it seems as though my ability to control it is decreasing. I worry, from time-to-time, where it all may be leading. I try to meet it with mindfulness & compassionate abiding. But, when my anger flares up, it can be like a whirlwind that just carries me away & leaves me trying to play catch-up.

Just today I received the latest mental health newsletter e-mail from PC. And one of the articles is about an anger workbook that is available. It is supposedly targeted at men. But perhaps what's in it could work for you too? Here's a link to the article:

Successful Anger Management | Anger Management

And then here are links to 8 additional articles, from PC's archives, that discuss ways of managing one's anger:

Angry All the Time for No Reason? This Might Be Why

How to Deal with Anger When You're All Too Good at Avoiding It

Understanding Anger Can Empower Women to Live Authentic Lives

10 Ways to Manage Anger and Anxiety | Anger Management

Ten Simple Techniques How to Control Anger

https://psychcentral.com/lib/getting...under-control/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...selves-others/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/tips-fo...g-anger/?all=1


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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 09:57 PM
  #5
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Originally Posted by LucyD View Post
This is one emotion that keeps coming back to me often. Of course I feel other things, too. I try to reason things out and to understand more and that seems to help. I sometimes wonder if I'm just an angry person. I've been diagnosed with 2 major serious diseases in the past year and heard this can cause emotional upheaval. I've come to accept the illnesses and am doing what I can to deal with them.

One thing I do is to challenge the Irrational Beliefs that send me into anger. Sometimes that makes the anger dissipate. Sometimes I just sit and stew, too.

Anyone else get angry a lot? What seems to cause it? Have any answers to deal with it?
I am sorry that you are struggling right now! I am struggling right now myself with anger
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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 07:46 AM
  #6
I'm usually quite a calm person.

I'll get angry only if:

1. somebody starts spreading rumours just because they heard something else, so they turn it around to make me look bad

2. people who interfeere in my life and have no idea what they are doing

and 3, people who do things behind my back and can't explain to me why they have done it (that, or openly tell me they didn't do it)
I'll sit their for a few minits planning how I can get my own back on them, realise that doing that is probably pointless and will get me nowhere, and end up rearanging my room and making a lot of noise by dropping things

decoration therapy. lol
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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 09:02 PM
  #7
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Originally Posted by Skeezyks View Post
Anger is something I've always struggled with. I'm angry most of the time at myself as well as with everything & everyone around me. And now that I'm aging it seems as though my ability to control it is decreasing. I worry, from time-to-time, where it all may be leading. I try to meet it with mindfulness & compassionate abiding. But, when my anger flares up, it can be like a whirlwind that just carries me away & leaves me trying to play catch-up.

Just today I received the latest mental health newsletter e-mail from PC. And one of the articles is about an anger workbook that is available. It is supposedly targeted at men. But perhaps what's in it could work for you too? Here's a link to the article:

Successful Anger Management | Anger Management

And then here are links to 8 additional articles, from PC's archives, that discuss ways of managing one's anger:

Angry All the Time for No Reason? This Might Be Why

How to Deal with Anger When You're All Too Good at Avoiding It

Understanding Anger Can Empower Women to Live Authentic Lives

10 Ways to Manage Anger and Anxiety | Anger Management

Ten Simple Techniques How to Control Anger

https://psychcentral.com/lib/getting...under-control/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...selves-others/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/tips-fo...g-anger/?all=1

Thank you. You are always so helpful!

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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 09:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Buffy01 View Post
I am sorry that you are struggling right now! I am struggling right now myself with anger
Thank you. It's okay to feel anger. When it takes over our lives and causes us consequences I think then we need to see what's going on with us.

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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 09:05 PM
  #9
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Originally Posted by raging vortex View Post
I'm usually quite a calm person.

I'll get angry only if:

1. somebody starts spreading rumours just because they heard something else, so they turn it around to make me look bad

2. people who interfeere in my life and have no idea what they are doing

and 3, people who do things behind my back and can't explain to me why they have done it (that, or openly tell me they didn't do it)
I'll sit their for a few minits planning how I can get my own back on them, realise that doing that is probably pointless and will get me nowhere, and end up rearanging my room and making a lot of noise by dropping things

decoration therapy. lol
I think those things would make anyone angry or upset. You have some good strategies there!

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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 05:09 AM
  #10
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I think those things would make anyone angry or upset. You have some good strategies there!
something else I'm trying to do more of is forgive people.

I'm actually not very good at that, so it will take time, but I'm getting their.
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 08:49 AM
  #11
I used to carry a lot of resentments which led to anger. I learned (through sobriety) to make amends for my part, and let go of the anger-especially if it had any sort of control over me or if it took up too much space in my head. For me it involved some writing and meditation but anyone can do this, it doesnt have to be a 12 step thing. I have written letters before and then burned them. I just do not believe in giving power to things I cant control-especially people in my life. If they are toxic I remove them from my life, if I have to deal with them I come to a place of peace and know that I did what I have to do and they are the ones responsible for their own feelings or behavior. I hope I do not sound preachy. I am not trying to sound like that.

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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 09:10 AM
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something else I'm trying to do more of is forgive people.

I'm actually not very good at that, so it will take time, but I'm getting their.
Forgiveness can be hard, yes.

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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 09:13 AM
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I used to carry a lot of resentments which led to anger. I learned (through sobriety) to make amends for my part, and let go of the anger-especially if it had any sort of control over me or if it took up too much space in my head. For me it involved some writing and meditation but anyone can do this, it doesnt have to be a 12 step thing. I have written letters before and then burned them. I just do not believe in giving power to things I cant control-especially people in my life. If they are toxic I remove them from my life, if I have to deal with them I come to a place of peace and know that I did what I have to do and they are the ones responsible for their own feelings or behavior. I hope I do not sound preachy. I am not trying to sound like that.
I, too, have written letters to those I felt hurt by and sent some of them out. It was what I did and the way it was, not going to beat myself up for it. I ripped a lot of the letters up, too. I read one at someone's grave, too. I have made many amends and people still didn't forgive me. I guess that's a problem with them and not me. I am not an ax murderer as some of them acted like. I find it hard to deal with some people and do get away from them if I feel too uncomfortable with them.

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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 02:42 PM
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Default Jan 30, 2019 at 04:27 PM
  #15
LucyD, thanks for starting this thread. And Skeezyks, thanks for the links.
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Default Feb 10, 2019 at 10:18 PM
  #16
Part of what I'm angry with is myself for getting this cirrhosis of the liver. I must of thought I was indestructible. I was never told that Fatty Liver Disease can lead to cirrhosis. Just always instructed to lose weight and eat low fat. I'm mad at myself for not listening, for being careless with my health. I feel like my family(of origin) blames me for getting cirrhosis, like I brought it on myself so why should they care? They act as if they don't give a flying *&#$. Well, I guess I don't really know what's in their hearts for they don't say. They ignore me for the most part. I understand they have their own health concerns and families and are up in years, too. Not one of them has said anything the least bit comforting to me, though.

I just am really scared under it all. Fearful of getting very sick, of bleeding to death from this disease, of ending up in the hospital for long periods of time, scared my pets will have no one to care for them. But I having been taking positive steps to help my health. Going to see a dietician to find out what is really best to eat, how much and how often with this disease.

Thanks for reading this if you got this far. Just needed to say this stuff.

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Default Feb 11, 2019 at 05:46 AM
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Part of what I'm angry with is myself for getting this cirrhosis of the liver. I must of thought I was indestructible. I was never told that Fatty Liver Disease can lead to cirrhosis. Just always instructed to lose weight and eat low fat. I'm mad at myself for not listening, for being careless with my health. I feel like my family(of origin) blames me for getting cirrhosis, like I brought it on myself so why should they care? They act as if they don't give a flying *&#$. Well, I guess I don't really know what's in their hearts for they don't say. They ignore me for the most part. I understand they have their own health concerns and families and are up in years, too. Not one of them has said anything the least bit comforting to me, though.

I just am really scared under it all. Fearful of getting very sick, of bleeding to death from this disease, of ending up in the hospital for long periods of time, scared my pets will have no one to care for them. But I having been taking positive steps to help my health. Going to see a dietician to find out what is really best to eat, how much and how often with this disease.

Thanks for reading this if you got this far. Just needed to say this stuff.
I had fatty liver disease before I had gastric bypass. Once I lost the weight it went away. I also had elevated liver enzymes due to drinking and those normalized when I stopped. I believe you can reverse fatty liver disease which can sometimes affect your enzymes- would any of that make a difference with cirrosis? Or is it like its too late? I am seriously asking because I do not know. If you undertook a diet or exercise plan would that change anything?

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Default Feb 11, 2019 at 06:15 AM
  #18
I'm so sorry, LucyD It sounds like you're trying your best to take care of your health. Good for you! Please don't be so hard on yourself. Please don't give up. It's definitely not your fault if you've had Fatty Liver Disease. Of course you didn't ask for it. What's important is that you're taking steps to take care of it. Be proud of yourself for that. I'm so sorry you're not getting the support you need and deserve IRL. Remember that we're here for you. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Feb 11, 2019 at 07:18 AM
  #19
I get really angry too, and quite often. I think it's a reasonably normal way of trying to process stress and hardships, it's just obviously not the healthiest way.

I'm going through anger spikes at the moment after ending several abusive relationships recently. Obviously in the long run I know this is the healthiest decision for me, but I have such rage at the people who put me through hell.

Now some of it for me is about having to realise where I went wrong, to accept and acknowledge how I didn't help matters, but to also be kind to myself and realise they were mistakes. And we can't be forever angry at our mistakes, otherwise we'll never move on with life. This also includes trying to come to terms with ill health and to stop putting myself down over it repeatedly. Bad luck also happens, and it sounds as if you've had a fair share of that too.

I know it isn't easy but... be kind to yourself. Keep venting here if it helps
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Default Feb 11, 2019 at 04:20 PM
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I'm so sorry, LucyD It sounds like you're trying your best to take care of your health. Good for you! Please don't be so hard on yourself. Please don't give up. It's definitely not your fault if you've had Fatty Liver Disease. Of course you didn't ask for it. What's important is that you're taking steps to take care of it. Be proud of yourself for that. I'm so sorry you're not getting the support you need and deserve IRL. Remember that we're here for you. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
Yes, I'm working on my health, thanks. Yes, support IRL would be lovely.

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